Tio Jaime: Aleph One

Goodbye, Vickie Lynn...

2007-02-08T13:46:00.000-08:00

This post was intended for the SixHertz House of Pain. In fact, why are you still here? Go to the SHoP already!

I was trying to figure out various post titles... here are some of the runners-up. (And note, Little Brains, the correct plural of "runner-up")

Say it ain't so!

If I'm correct, that was the headline in the local papers when Joe Montana announced he was leaving the 49ers... or was it the Giants threatening to move to St. Petersburg?

I would've liked to have known you, but I was billions too poor...

Going with the Candle in the Wind theme here. Believe me, if I could embed some shitty MIDI, I would. And did nobody remember the horrible MIDIs of the mid/late 90s? I put them up at my xanga page for a while, until I myself was too annoyed by them. But WTF, no, now myspace felt the need to reintroduce embedded shit-music? Thanks, assholes.

Oh, I guess the real meat-and-potatoes-and-sweater-kittens of this post? Anna Nicole Smith died at age 39 today. I remember her being pretty hot before going the WHORE route, and then the nasty route. Here. wikipedia entry for you.

Well shit. Since I was stupid enough to link my blogger.com (fuck you, I ain't giving you a link) to my gmail account, now I can't get into the SHoP. And SHoP Overlord SixHertz isn't near his computer. So my devious plan of capitalizing on society's loss in the name of a SixHertz traffic spike is quickly taking a giant shit on itself.

I'm gonna mirror this post somewhere else for now...

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

You are not you. You are me.

2006-03-02T10:11:00.000-08:00

No shit.

There hasn't been anything here since right around the start of December. Just go to the SHoP already. There's been a buttload of posts since then. And you're already behind.

G'won, git!

Tio Jaime

g-sisters still fucking around w/a trailer on a highway

2005-11-30T10:07:00.000-08:00

Draft from last night! 29 November 2005, 2201hrs.

And I think this is the first TAR post whose title didn't reference the little Gaghan shits.

Tio J

Live 3am Criticism of The Amazing Race: Dumbass Edition!

You are now in chat room "YayIM."
TioJ has entered the chat room.
TioJ (8:54:57 PM): hello dere!
TioJ (8:55:16 PM): five minutes until TAR
TioJ (8:59:15 PM): and i had two-and-a-half minutes left of D&M
TioJ (8:59:28 PM): i'll get it on the commercial break
TioJ (9:00:06 PM):

TioJ (9:00:07 PM): here we go
TioJ (9:00:13 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON THE AMAZING RACE
TioJ (9:00:39 PM): Bart the Grizzly Bear!
TioJ (9:01:17 PM): Non-Elimination Leg!
TioJ (9:01:27 PM): A MAZE ING AMAZING A MAZE ING AMAZING
TioJ (9:01:33 PM): A MAZE ING AMAZING A MAZE ING
TioJ (9:01:40 PM): A MAZE ING AMAZING A MAZE ING AMAZING
TioJ (9:01:44 PM): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAMAZIGN RACE
TioJ (9:01:49 PM): AAAAAAAAAAAAMAZING RACE
TioJ (9:01:55 PM): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMAZING RACE
TioJ (9:02:02 PM): A MAZE ING AMAZING A MAZE ING AMAZING!
TioJ (9:02:21 PM): commercial... time for D&M
TioJ (9:04:54 PM): OK another minute left in D&M
TioJ (9:04:55 PM): this is Salt Lake City, UT
TioJ (9:05:05 PM): ninth pit stop!
TioJ (9:05:13 PM): weavers last, not eliminated
TioJ (9:05:36 PM): Linz family first to depart 12:46 am
TioJ (9:05:50 PM): drive to park city HS
TioJ (9:06:21 PM): bransen daughters 2nd to depart 1:23? 1:27?
TioJ (9:06:33 PM): whoa, that bransen daughter is kinda butterfacey
TioJ (9:06:41 PM): g-sisters 3rd to depart 1:30 am
TioJ (9:07:19 PM): wow a high school
TioJ (9:08:05 PM): and wow the linz kids are annoying
TioJ (9:08:15 PM): i want to be molested by megan, but they're still annoying
TioJ (9:08:45 PM): weavers last to depart 5:02 am
TioJ (9:08:54 PM): holy shit, that's like 3-and-a-half hours delay
TioJ (9:10:02 PM): ha ha bottleneck
TioJ (9:10:33 PM): OK that's annoying.... stupid widow weaver
TioJ (9:14:34 PM): drive 14 miles to Heber Valley Railway
TioJ (9:16:15 PM): OK enough with the annoying screaming already
TioJ (9:19:16 PM): STFU and get out of the damn balloon
TioJ (9:19:47 PM): Detour: Spike it or Steam it
TioJ (9:19:58 PM): A Detour is a choice between two tasks, each with its own pros and cons
TioJ (9:21:32 PM): wow you're annoying but i wanna hump you
TioJ (9:21:37 PM): what's "steam it?"
TioJ (9:21:40 PM): i kinda missed that part
TioJ (9:24:43 PM): good hustle, Weavers
TioJ (9:24:56 PM): Linz in first
TioJ (9:25:07 PM): travel 148 miles to Bonneville Salt Flats
TioJ (9:25:45 PM): wow megan linz was totallyh worthless
TioJ (9:25:50 PM): bransen daughters in second
TioJ (9:26:07 PM): nice job weavers
TioJ (9:26:51 PM): weavers in 3rd!
TioJ (9:27:23 PM): ooh g-sister panties!
TioJ (9:27:34 PM): STFU!
TioJ (9:27:42 PM): i want to bang the younger ones, but please STFU
TioJ (9:27:46 PM): FUCK YOU GAGHANS!!!
TioJ (9:29:54 PM): was that asian on asian snogging in the K-mart commercial?
TioJ (9:34:33 PM): bransen daughters first at campsite
TioJ (9:34:39 PM): weavers 2nd at campsite
TioJ (9:34:46 PM): wow, WTF happened to the linz kids?
TioJ (9:35:32 PM): ha ha production error drained the battery
TioJ (9:38:19 PM): in this family edition of TAR, roadblocks sometimes by two family members
TioJ (9:40:14 PM): travel 100+ miles to yellowstone and see Old Faithful
TioJ (9:41:33 PM): heh, chicks with trailers
TioJ (9:46:53 PM): g-sisters still fucking around w/a trailer on a highway
TioJ (9:47:10 PM): "cause you're a retard!"
TioJ (9:47:51 PM): wow, nice job weavers
TioJ (9:48:28 PM): crazy horse shit!
TioJ (9:49:40 PM): linzes in last
TioJ (9:51:28 PM): "it would be disappointing to lose because a team caught up"
TioJ (9:51:34 PM): HOW THE FUCK ELSE DO YOU LOSE IN A RACE?
TioJ (9:52:52 PM): drive south and find something
TioJ (9:53:06 PM): ooh hi tricia g-sister
TioJ (9:56:12 PM): weavers? g-sisters
TioJ (9:56:20 PM): oops i mean g-sisters
TioJ (9:56:38 PM): g-sisters, first... weavers second... not the pit stop
TioJ (9:56:44 PM): yeah no shit TO BE CONTINUED
TioJ (9:56:53 PM): stay chuned for scenes from our next episode
TioJ (9:59:33 PM): on the next episode of TAR...
TioJ (9:59:39 PM): weavers get pulled over
TioJ (9:59:42 PM): what a shitty episode
TioJ has left the chat room.

would've been cool if Bart had mauled the little Gaghan shits

2005-11-30T10:03:00.000-08:00

Draft from 28 November 2005, 2205hrs. Almost done!

Making its debut on TJ:A1 is The Amazing Race: Family Edition! Partially because this season sucks giant butt, but also because I think i had a post which I didn't want to knock off the top of the SHoP...

Tio J

Oh look, it's TAR: Shitty Family Edition finally relegated to TJ:A1!

You are now in chat room "TARPooptacularEdition."
TioJ has entered the chat room.
TioJ (8:56:53 PM): hello dere!
TioJ (8:57:26 PM): taped last week's TAR
TioJ (8:57:33 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON THE AMAZING RACE
TioJ (8:58:25 PM): G-SISTERS TEAM #1
TioJ (8:58:38 PM): bransen daughters last
TioJ (8:58:49 PM): oh yeah, two hour episode
TioJ (9:18:59 PM): sorry
TioJ (9:19:03 PM): Pittsburgh was calling
TioJ (9:19:08 PM): check the timestamps
TioJ (9:19:27 PM): A MAZE ING AMAZING A MAZE ING AMAZING
TioJ (9:19:32 PM): A MAZE ING AMAZING A MAZE ING
TioJ (9:19:39 PM): A MAZE ING AMAZING A MAZE ING AMAZING
TioJ (9:19:44 PM): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAMAZING RACE
TioJ (9:19:49 PM): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMAZING RACE
TioJ (9:19:54 PM): AAAAAAAAAAAAAMAZING RACE
TioJ (9:19:57 PM): A MAZE ING AMAZING
TioJ (9:20:00 PM): A MAZE ING AMAZING
TioJ (9:20:54 PM): This is Lake Powell Arizona
TioJ (9:21:23 PM): G-Sisters first to depart 5:45 AM
TioJ (9:21:35 PM): teams must now drive 136 miles to Monument Valley, UT
TioJ (9:21:46 PM): find John Ford's Point
TioJ (9:22:03 PM): i like the two younger g-sisters
TioJ (9:22:22 PM): yeah let chicks drive campers
TioJ (9:22:33 PM): Linzes 2nd to depart 5:45AM
TioJ (9:23:14 PM): Weavers 3rd to depart 6:06am
TioJ (9:24:29 PM): downloading some Juman in the background right now
TioJ (9:24:37 PM): Bransens last to depart 6:27am
TioJ (9:26:30 PM): you stupid chicks
TioJ (9:28:27 PM): choose two family members to ride helicopter to elephant butte
TioJ (9:30:24 PM): teams must now travel 180 miles to Moab UT to gemini bridges
TioJ (9:34:22 PM): A Detour is a choice between two tasks, each with its own pros and cons
TioJ (9:34:27 PM): ride down or drop down
TioJ (9:34:38 PM): oh drop down, motherfuckers
TioJ (9:35:57 PM): linzes drop down, weavers ride down
TioJ (9:39:03 PM): teams must now drive to green river state park in UT
TioJ (9:40:05 PM): something about a production error dropping the g-sisters in to last place?
TioJ (9:41:39 PM): so how'd they get back up?
TioJ (9:41:56 PM): oh the g-sisters will be there a while, huh?
TioJ (9:42:03 PM): luckily they'll bottleneck
TioJ (9:44:43 PM): linzes first to depart 7:00
TioJ (9:45:04 PM): travel 20 miles to Heber, UT and find Bart the trained grizzly bear
TioJ (9:45:10 PM): Weavers 2nd to depart 7:15
TioJ (9:45:34 PM): Bransen daughters 3rd to depart 7:30
TioJ (9:45:39 PM): g-sisters last to depart 7:45
TioJ (9:45:51 PM): Heber City
TioJ (9:46:20 PM): Krispy Kreme in Heber City, UT!
TioJ (9:46:58 PM): travel 22 miles to Park City UT
TioJ (9:47:10 PM): wow i want a trained grizzly bear
TioJ (9:48:10 PM): would've been cool if Bart had mauled the little Gaghan shits
TioJ (9:48:12 PM): FUCK YOU GAGHANS
TioJ (9:50:29 PM): second of only two Yields
TioJ (9:50:55 PM): you dumbasses
TioJ (9:51:08 PM): should've yielded the last place
TioJ (9:51:14 PM): Roadblock
TioJ (9:51:19 PM): task only one person can perform
TioJ (9:52:14 PM): Linzfamily in first
TioJ (9:52:26 PM): drive 20 miles to salt lake city, pit stop
TioJ (9:53:02 PM): oh well, w/florida in last place, now they're fucked
TioJ (9:53:40 PM): bransens in 2nd
TioJ (9:54:04 PM): g-sisters in 3rd
TioJ (9:57:55 PM): ooh hot Uahan
TioJ (9:58:01 PM): Miss Latin Utah!
TioJ (9:58:07 PM): Linz family team #1
TioJ (9:58:23 PM): trip for 4 to jackson hole, WY
TioJ (9:58:58 PM): bransen daughters team #2
TioJ (9:59:22 PM): g-sisters team #3
TioJ (10:00:35 PM): "welcome to salt lake city!"
TioJ (10:00:40 PM): weavers last team to arrive
TioJ (10:00:43 PM): WTF?
TioJ (10:00:47 PM): non-elimination leg
TioJ (10:00:52 PM): whoa
TioJ (10:01:03 PM): whoops
TioJ (10:01:11 PM): i wanna hump Miss Latin Utah
TioJ (10:01:57 PM): i just wanna play w/Miss Latin Utah's boobs
TioJ (10:02:09 PM): wow, interesting episode
TioJ (10:02:18 PM): Stay Chuned for scenes from our next episode
TioJ (10:03:14 PM): On the next episode of TAR
TioJ (10:03:35 PM): wow, what a shitty season...
TioJ has left the chat room.

and now george is a woman

2005-11-30T09:55:00.000-08:00

Draft from 13 November 2005, 2314hrs.

And a giant hip-hip-hooray for one of the shortest 3am Criticisms ever, if only because of the shittiest episodes of Grey's Anatomy ever. Fun fun fun.

Tio J

Grey's Anatomy slipping deeper and deeper into the abyss of SUCK. And you can read it here first at TJ:A1

You are now in chat room "GACanBiteMe."
TioJ has entered the chat room.
TioJ (9:57:53 PM): hello dere
TioJ (9:58:03 PM): just downloaded some more Zoo music, gonna watch Grey's Anatomy
TioJ (10:00:50 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON GREY'S ANATOMY
TioJ (10:00:54 PM): what a pile of shit
TioJ (10:01:09 PM): ferry!
TioJ (10:02:20 PM): wow shitty dr. izzie/frat cockt0r story line
TioJ (10:02:46 PM): blackt0rs 3 and 1
TioJ (10:03:44 PM): downtown seattle!
TioJ (10:04:27 PM): don't bodies bounce?
TioJ (10:04:39 PM): yay for the dumb shitty opening credits
TioJ (10:04:44 PM): oh they added something
TioJ (10:06:42 PM): wow their hair is hot
TioJ (10:11:55 PM): carpe diem, man! sieze the day!
TioJ (10:15:06 PM): tha'ts a shitty throwaway line...
TioJ (10:15:10 PM): boyfriend torture
TioJ (10:16:59 PM): and now george is a woman
TioJ (10:17:41 PM): stupid show
TioJ (10:18:14 PM): YOU UGLY ASIAN HORSE
TioJ (10:20:06 PM): It's the Cancer episode!
TioJ (10:21:14 PM): yeah no shit he jumped
TioJ (10:21:18 PM): did you just now realize that?
TioJ (10:29:56 PM): ooh victoria's secret commercial
TioJ (10:29:58 PM): yay!
TioJ (10:34:44 PM): WTF are they babbling on about now?
TioJ (10:37:35 PM): so why is dr. izzie all pissed about it?
TioJ (10:49:22 PM): "here's to the ass who's not being supportive"
TioJ (11:00:11 PM): a thanksgiving edition of Grey's Anatomy
TioJ (11:00:14 PM): how shitty
TioJ has left the chat room.

i should play halo

2005-11-30T09:51:00.000-08:00

Draft from 07 November 2005, 1638hrs.

Was trying to 3amC Reunion with LMHBrent, when yay for Fox, they changed up shows on us. We decided to go ahead. Do a little betting, do a little sniping. All in all, not a bad show...

Tio J

Dual Live 3am Criticism of Fox's ~~Reunion~~ The War at Home

You are now in chat room "IWanttoBeMolestedbyChylerLeigh."
TioJaime has entered the chat room.
TioJaime (8:06:47 PM): hello dere
TioJaime (8:07:01 PM): like i just told LMHBrent, i'm gonna work out, and then we're gonna watch Reunion
LMHBrent has entered the chat room.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (8:50:04 PM): OK
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (8:50:09 PM): hello dere
LMHBrent (8:50:13 PM): halo
TioJaime (8:50:27 PM): hello dere
TioJaime (8:50:47 PM): watching Red vs. Blue
LMHBrent (8:50:50 PM): good stuff
TioJaime (8:50:53 PM): yeah
TioJaime (8:51:13 PM): YES on H
LMHBrent (8:51:27 PM): are you going to play halo?
TioJaime (8:51:38 PM): maybe later tonight...
TioJaime (8:53:52 PM): i hope the delayisn't too big
LMHBrent (8:54:04 PM): oh yeah shit
LMHBrent (8:54:06 PM): i forgot about that
TioJaime (8:54:53 PM): how was work dude?
LMHBrent (8:55:17 PM): work was slow
LMHBrent (8:55:36 PM): how about you?
TioJaime (8:55:38 PM): that's cool
TioJaime (8:55:42 PM): work fucking hard this week
TioJaime (8:55:45 PM): holy shit
TioJaime (8:55:54 PM): oh, you wanna watch Starved after this?
LMHBrent (8:56:22 PM): i wish i could. but i gotta go to sleep
TioJaime (8:56:24 PM): watching the end of The OC... a mellow version of that Phantom Planet song
TioJaime (8:56:27 PM): no you don't
LMHBrent (8:56:28 PM): hehee
LMHBrent (8:56:39 PM): i did it last week because i didn't have to work on friday
LMHBrent (8:56:43 PM): but i gotta work tomorrow stupid work
TioJaime (8:56:47 PM): ahh
TioJaime (8:57:00 PM): OK we got a little over 3 minutes
TioJaime (8:57:33 PM): ooh allison mack on Smallville
TioJaime (8:57:41 PM): and is 7th Heaven still on?
LMHBrent (8:57:44 PM): i think so
LMHBrent (8:57:48 PM): hey what channel is it on again?
TioJaime (8:57:53 PM): Fox
LMHBrent (8:57:56 PM): oh yeah
LMHBrent (8:58:28 PM): okay on fox now
LMHBrent (8:58:35 PM): nissan commercial
TioJaime (8:58:53 PM): i have a nutrogena commercial?
TioJaime (8:58:56 PM): neutrogena
LMHBrent (8:59:25 PM): hm
LMHBrent (8:59:29 PM): now it's a red cross one
TioJaime (8:59:35 PM): shit, my vcr is off by 2 minutes?
LMHBrent (8:59:43 PM): the o.c. preview
TioJaime (8:59:50 PM): yeah
TioJaime (9:00:09 PM): WTF?
LMHBrent (9:00:13 PM): WTFFFF
LMHBrent (9:00:15 PM): shit
TioJaime (9:00:16 PM): reunion not on tonight
LMHBrent (9:00:19 PM): yueah
TioJaime (9:00:19 PM): ass holes
LMHBrent (9:00:25 PM): eff that noise
LMHBrent (9:00:27 PM): what is this shit
TioJaime (9:00:34 PM): well fuck me hard
TioJaime (9:00:41 PM): i already missed the beginning of Supernatural
LMHBrent (9:00:45 PM): dammit
TioJaime (9:00:48 PM): yeah fuck you Mary Tyler Moore
LMHBrent (9:00:56 PM): i think we're synced up
TioJaime (9:00:57 PM): fucking bitch
TioJaime (9:01:04 PM): oh i'm sorry
LMHBrent (9:01:04 PM): vicki
LMHBrent (9:01:08 PM): we're out of cerela
TioJaime (9:01:16 PM): my wife vicki
LMHBrent (9:01:18 PM): forgive me
LMHBrent (9:01:20 PM): oh you're ahead
LMHBrent (9:01:22 PM): but 20 secs
TioJaime (9:01:23 PM): nice rack
TioJaime (9:01:24 PM): yeah i think so
LMHBrent (9:01:28 PM): 13 year odl mike
LMHBrent (9:01:32 PM): wet the bed until he was 11
LMHBrent (9:01:34 PM): 4800 bucks
TioJaime (9:01:34 PM): OK this might be funny
LMHBrent (9:01:39 PM): yeah we'll see
LMHBrent (9:01:42 PM): PLACE YOUR BETS NOW
TioJaime (9:01:48 PM): LOL
LMHBrent (9:01:52 PM): AHHAHA
LMHBrent (9:01:53 PM): penis
LMHBrent (9:01:55 PM): he said penis
LMHBrent (9:02:03 PM): he's a dork
TioJaime (9:02:05 PM): dude this could be good
LMHBrent (9:02:12 PM): okay we'll keep watching
LMHBrent (9:02:13 PM): drink baby
LMHBrent (9:02:16 PM): glenlivet?
LMHBrent (9:02:20 PM): oh yeah costco sells glenlivet now
TioJaime (9:02:33 PM): ooh
LMHBrent (9:02:37 PM): ahhaha
LMHBrent (9:02:54 PM): pornography baby
TioJaime (9:02:54 PM): ooh nice rack
LMHBrent (9:02:59 PM): ahahahahah
LMHBrent (9:03:20 PM): she's fat but it's okay
LMHBrent (9:03:26 PM): baby got rack
LMHBrent (9:03:57 PM): he's so gay
TioJaime (9:03:58 PM): oh my baby got rack
LMHBrent (9:04:06 PM): what is this
LMHBrent (9:04:07 PM): the war at home
TioJaime (9:04:08 PM): the war at home
TioJaime (9:04:19 PM): how fucking long is this show?
TioJaime (9:04:21 PM): i should play halo
LMHBrent (9:04:28 PM): half an hour
TioJaime (9:04:46 PM): FUCKING YAHOO! TV DICKS
TioJaime (9:04:52 PM): it fucking says Reunion
LMHBrent (9:05:21 PM): my tv guide said war at home
LMHBrent (9:05:25 PM): pilot episode
LMHBrent (9:05:29 PM): then bernie mac at 9;30
TioJaime (9:05:31 PM): hmm
TioJaime (9:05:49 PM): OK so the war at home until it pisses me off
LMHBrent (9:05:57 PM): okay
TioJaime (9:05:59 PM): and then halo until Starved
TioJaime (9:06:36 PM): back
LMHBrent (9:06:40 PM): okay back now
LMHBrent (9:06:46 PM): we're not that far off
LMHBrent (9:06:52 PM): ps2 educational
LMHBrent (9:07:01 PM): HAHAHAH
TioJaime (9:07:06 PM): WTF?
LMHBrent (9:07:09 PM): he is so gay
TioJaime (9:07:20 PM): LOL
LMHBrent (9:07:24 PM): balloons?
TioJaime (9:07:34 PM): "I don't know why my father thinks I'm gay"
LMHBrent (9:07:40 PM): call this #
TioJaime (9:07:50 PM): i wonder what that number is...
LMHBrent (9:07:53 PM): "a gay"
LMHBrent (9:07:58 PM): yeah i was thinking that too
TioJaime (9:08:00 PM): I AM A GAY
LMHBrent (9:08:03 PM): AHAHHA
LMHBrent (9:08:11 PM): "he's my lover"
TioJaime (9:08:27 PM): i like the flat daughter
TioJaime (9:08:36 PM): ooh yeah
LMHBrent (9:08:38 PM): does she remind you of someone?
TioJaime (9:08:55 PM): hillary duff?
TioJaime (9:08:58 PM): LOL
LMHBrent (9:09:01 PM): ahahaha
LMHBrent (9:09:02 PM): BLEEP
TioJaime (9:09:03 PM): wow two LOLs
LMHBrent (9:09:25 PM): ahhaha
LMHBrent (9:09:27 PM): nice mom
TioJaime (9:09:28 PM): who were you thinking of?
TioJaime (9:09:42 PM): ooh Boots!
LMHBrent (9:09:45 PM): mmm
LMHBrent (9:10:13 PM): he doesn't convince me as a dad yet
LMHBrent (9:10:17 PM): oh that's the guy from frasier
TioJaime (9:10:36 PM): oh shit, i can't play halo after this
LMHBrent (9:10:39 PM): why not?
TioJaime (9:11:01 PM): my xb0x0r is hooked up through my VCR
TioJaime (9:11:07 PM): which is taping on The WB right now
LMHBrent (9:11:08 PM): oh
LMHBrent (9:11:16 PM): what's on The WB?
TioJaime (9:11:22 PM): Supernatural
LMHBrent (9:11:29 PM): o i c
TioJaime (9:12:00 PM): did she say she was grossed out by his colostomy bag?
TioJaime (9:12:11 PM): LOL he's black
LMHBrent (9:12:15 PM): something about a cross to bear
TioJaime (9:12:16 PM): ops sorry
LMHBrent (9:12:16 PM): AHAHHAHAAHAH
LMHBrent (9:12:35 PM): HAHAHAHA
LMHBrent (9:12:40 PM): short for bootay
LMHBrent (9:12:42 PM): that's hilarious
TioJaime (9:12:49 PM): wow, pretty good so far
TioJaime (9:12:51 PM): 3 LOLs
LMHBrent (9:13:47 PM): not bad
TioJaime (9:15:52 PM): OK PLACE BETS NOW
TioJaime (9:16:12 PM): WILL THE SECOND HALF OF THE WAR AT HOME GET MORE THAN TWO LOLs?
LMHBrent (9:16:24 PM): my guess is yes
TioJaime (9:16:30 PM): i think so too
TioJaime (9:16:36 PM): let's see, shall we?
LMHBrent (9:16:39 PM): yes let's
LMHBrent (9:16:48 PM): yeah i knew it
LMHBrent (9:16:50 PM): bait and switch
TioJaime (9:16:51 PM): MAN-FUCKING-GINA
TioJaime (9:17:25 PM): i like the cutaways to the famly members
TioJaime (9:17:32 PM): kinda like Titus, but with the whole family
LMHBrent (9:17:33 PM): it's kinda interesting
LMHBrent (9:17:36 PM): YEAH like titus
TioJaime (9:17:49 PM): who was the chick the daughter reminded you of?
LMHBrent (9:18:01 PM): i'm not sure
LMHBrent (9:18:15 PM): she reminded me of someone though
TioJaime (9:18:38 PM): the mom was hotter on Grounded for Life
LMHBrent (9:18:39 PM): brizown shiznugah
LMHBrent (9:18:46 PM): i never watched that show
TioJaime (9:18:57 PM): good show
TioJaime (9:19:00 PM): mom was waaay hotter
LMHBrent (9:19:01 PM): mom reminds me of someone too
LMHBrent (9:19:29 PM): hahahahaha
LMHBrent (9:19:30 PM): some
TioJaime (9:19:33 PM): oh did you get my e-mail about renee zellweger
TioJaime (9:19:35 PM): i almost laughed
LMHBrent (9:19:38 PM): yeah she broke up
TioJaime (9:19:42 PM): again, almost laughed
LMHBrent (9:19:45 PM): million man march
LMHBrent (9:20:00 PM): ahhaa
TioJaime (9:20:04 PM): WTF dude
LMHBrent (9:20:12 PM): now that was just weird
TioJaime (9:20:17 PM): uh huh
TioJaime (9:20:18 PM): LOL
TioJaime (9:20:23 PM): there's #1
LMHBrent (9:20:25 PM): there'a a LOL
LMHBrent (9:20:28 PM): hahahahahah
TioJaime (9:21:02 PM): chuckled
TioJaime (9:21:05 PM): does that count?
LMHBrent (9:21:11 PM): maybe half
TioJaime (9:21:18 PM): it's technically a laugh
TioJaime (9:21:22 PM): so that's #2
LMHBrent (9:21:26 PM): ok
TioJaime (9:21:35 PM): mom's kinda chubby
LMHBrent (9:21:38 PM): yeah
LMHBrent (9:21:41 PM): like in king of queens
TioJaime (9:21:52 PM): oh i hear she got real chubby
LMHBrent (9:22:04 PM): hahahahaa
TioJaime (9:22:10 PM): WTF
LMHBrent (9:22:11 PM): new york
TioJaime (9:22:37 PM): this is getting weird
LMHBrent (9:23:01 PM): kinda
TioJaime (9:23:21 PM): that was weird
TioJaime (9:23:29 PM): new kelly clarkson CD
LMHBrent (9:23:38 PM): he is gay
LMHBrent (9:23:39 PM): hahaa
LMHBrent (9:23:41 PM): his friend
TioJaime (9:23:43 PM): he was just kidding, right? he doesn't know does he?
TioJaime (9:23:44 PM): LOL
TioJaime (9:23:50 PM): there's #3
LMHBrent (9:23:55 PM): wow
LMHBrent (9:23:58 PM): so it's tied
TioJaime (9:24:07 PM): no i said more than two
LMHBrent (9:24:27 PM): ohhh
LMHBrent (9:24:28 PM): ok
TioJaime (9:25:05 PM): oh shit
TioJaime (9:25:14 PM): his shirt says North Hollywood
TioJaime (9:25:19 PM): go huskies
LMHBrent (9:25:23 PM): OHH SERIOUSLY?
LMHBrent (9:25:26 PM): damn
TioJaime (9:25:30 PM): did you miss it?
LMHBrent (9:25:32 PM): yeah i did
LMHBrent (9:25:35 PM): dammit
TioJaime (9:25:39 PM): are we synced now?
LMHBrent (9:25:52 PM): bowl game that's super?
LMHBrent (9:26:02 PM): sprint together with nextel
TioJaime (9:26:07 PM): i think we're only trailing by about 10s or so?
LMHBrent (9:26:10 PM): yeah
LMHBrent (9:26:13 PM): that sounds about right
TioJaime (9:26:18 PM): oh coo
TioJaime (9:26:21 PM): cool
TioJaime (9:26:22 PM): no way
TioJaime (9:26:26 PM): mario baseball?
LMHBrent (9:26:28 PM): mario
LMHBrent (9:26:29 PM): bowser
LMHBrent (9:26:34 PM): dammit
LMHBrent (9:26:35 PM): not mario
TioJaime (9:26:38 PM): LOL
LMHBrent (9:26:39 PM): ahhahahahaha
LMHBrent (9:26:40 PM): COOL
TioJaime (9:26:44 PM): oh man Mario Superstar Baseball!
LMHBrent (9:26:52 PM): that's kinda cool
LMHBrent (9:27:17 PM): desperate husbands
TioJaime (9:27:48 PM): LOL
TioJaime (9:27:52 PM): omar
LMHBrent (9:28:02 PM): #4
TioJaime (9:28:20 PM): #4?
TioJaime (9:28:27 PM): LOL
TioJaime (9:28:29 PM): oh my
TioJaime (9:28:35 PM): oh duh
TioJaime (9:28:38 PM): yeah #4
TioJaime (9:28:39 PM): and #5
LMHBrent has left the chat room.
TioJaime (9:30:11 PM): where'd he go?
LMHBrent has entered the chat room.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:32:12 PM): Ok watching bernie mac now
LMHBrent (9:32:13 PM): my laptop overheated
LMHBrent (9:32:15 PM): yeah same here
TioJaime (9:32:40 PM): oops
TioJaime (9:32:42 PM): wrong window
TioJaime (9:32:49 PM): maybe i should take a shower
LMHBrent (9:32:54 PM): i should too
TioJaime (9:33:51 PM): OK dude
LMHBrent (9:33:58 PM): okay
TioJaime (9:34:04 PM): so i'll see you @ 10 for Starved
LMHBrent (9:34:13 PM): hahah
LMHBrent (9:34:14 PM): maybe
LMHBrent (9:34:16 PM): i might be asleep
TioJaime (9:34:19 PM): oh YES on H
TioJaime (9:34:32 PM): OK dude, i'll talk to you in a bit
TioJaime has left the chat room.
LMHBrent has left the chat room.

And does nobody find it odd that there are more blackt0rs in Grey's Anatomy then there are black soldiers in OVER * THERE

2005-11-30T09:47:00.000-08:00

Draft from 07 November 2005, 1628hrs. As of post time, OVER * THERE has been cancelled. Ha ha.

Yet another SHoP 3amC demoted to TJ:A1 status.

You are now in chat room "HurtMeBadNickiAycox."
JihadJimmyMWCCDF has entered the chat room.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:01:45 PM): hello dere
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:01:54 PM): TV MA LV
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:02:08 PM): no more Halo for now
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:02:17 PM): time for the season finale of OVER * THERE
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:06:27 PM): OVER * THERE
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:06:31 PM): and jimmy has to pee and poo
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:06:36 PM): shit, no rest for teh tio jaime
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:06:53 PM): FUCK YOU TERRORIST
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:07:06 PM): FUCK YOU TERRORIST
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:07:43 PM): oh shit
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:11:16 PM): hey go fuck yourself Dim-fuck
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:11:27 PM): nice sniping there, FX
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:13:05 PM): fuck that... the last time Angel sang a song a shitty theme song was created
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:13:13 PM): yeah no shit "bad things happen when he sings"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:14:39 PM): that song sucked
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:15:36 PM): commercial, but i don't have to poo
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:20:09 PM): Romolo!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:20:58 PM): And does nobody find it odd that there are more blackt0rs in Grey's Anatomy then there are black soldiers in OVER * THERE
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:21:47 PM): should've humped her while she was hot to trot
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:29:53 PM): ooh why is she doublewide?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:30:03 PM): oh we're not gonna find out huh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:30:32 PM): gonna run down a kid?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:30:57 PM): oops
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:31:00 PM): fuck you terrorist kid?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:39:40 PM): put your fucking helmet back on dim-fuck
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:39:44 PM): didn't you see We Were Soldiers?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:40:00 PM): FUCK YOU TERRORIST
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:40:14 PM): SHIT
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:40:29 PM): medal ceremony
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:50:09 PM): quite a bit of FUCK YOU TERRORISTS
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:53:29 PM): hmm, lieutenant shot in the back, eh?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:56:55 PM): shitty theme song@
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:59:15 PM): OVER * THERE
JihadJimmyMWCCDF has left the chat room.

Way to suck ass, Grey's Anatomy

2005-11-30T09:45:00.000-08:00

Draft from 06 November 2005, 2301hrs.

More 3am Criticism of Grey's Anatomy. A TJ:A1 exclusive. Yay.

You are now in chat room "TioJaimeWhoops."
TioJ has entered the chat room.
TioJ (9:01:09 PM): and apparently since KGO-TV has a desperate housewives recap right now...
TioJ (9:01:21 PM): looks like i screwed up and i'm an hour early
TioJ (9:01:35 PM): OK gonna work out
TioJ (9:01:39 PM): HELLO DERE, btw
TioJ (9:02:06 PM): OK back in about an hour....
TioJ (9:02:10 PM):

TioJ (9:56:27 PM): wonderful.... they're pushing the shitty relationship shit
TioJ (9:56:34 PM): this episode is gonna suck balls
TioJ (9:59:54 PM): and the tail end of desperate housewives looks kinda stupid...
TioJ (10:01:10 PM): oh wonderful, an all new Grey's Anatomy
TioJ (10:01:15 PM): Previously on Grey's Anatomy
TioJ (10:01:44 PM): blah blah blah why didn't you kiss izzy we're a couple pick me
TioJ (10:02:00 PM): Way to suck ass, Grey's Anatomy
TioJ (10:02:07 PM): i miss seattle
TioJ (10:02:29 PM): two black nurses/orderlies?
TioJ (10:02:42 PM): how fucking unrealistic is this diversity?
TioJ (10:02:51 PM): and a black marriage counselor
TioJ (10:03:40 PM): and george sucks now
TioJ (10:03:44 PM): blackt0r 1
TioJ (10:04:11 PM): I have not gone mental
TioJ (10:04:24 PM): shitty shitty episode
TioJ (10:04:36 PM): blackt0r 2
TioJ (10:04:43 PM): blackt0r 1
TioJ (10:05:34 PM): something shitty is afoot
TioJ (10:06:20 PM): HFA
TioJ (10:07:11 PM): you already blew your load in the previews... we weren't surprised
TioJ (10:07:21 PM): ______________
TioJ (10:07:24 PM): GREY'S ANATOMY
TioJ (10:07:26 PM): ______________
TioJ (10:11:38 PM): wow could this be grey's anatomy's first indian
TioJ (10:12:20 PM): Seattle Community!
TioJ (10:13:27 PM): "you want me to babysit the wheelchair chick"
TioJ (10:13:41 PM): and thus a shitty storyline is born
TioJ (10:14:46 PM): and now blackt0r 2 / george sucks
TioJ (10:15:00 PM): i should fucking play GTA: San Andreas
TioJ (10:15:15 PM): God she looks so goddam pathetic
TioJ (10:16:21 PM): "you couldn't be bothered... to kiss me goodnight"
TioJ (10:17:28 PM): blackt0r 1
TioJ (10:18:02 PM): ooh i wanna be molested by keira knightley
TioJ (10:19:17 PM): that was a shitty visa commercial
TioJ (10:19:27 PM): that made no sense
TioJ (10:20:28 PM): yeah i'm sure Destiny's Child does their Christmas shopping at Wal-Mart
TioJ (10:20:55 PM): sorry, i'm unusually pissed off today because of this shitty episode
TioJ (10:21:07 PM): blackt0r 1
TioJ (10:22:29 PM): ha ha take that HFA
TioJ (10:23:28 PM): another black doctor!
TioJ (10:24:42 PM): and now george is a whiny bitch
TioJ (10:24:46 PM): yeah bring the patient by
TioJ (10:25:41 PM): STFU dr izzy
TioJ (10:26:03 PM): another black orderly
TioJ (10:26:19 PM): blackt0r 1
TioJ (10:26:29 PM): blackt0r 2
TioJ (10:26:33 PM): HFA playing the GF-card
TioJ (10:27:01 PM): blackt0r 3
TioJ (10:28:27 PM): oops.. gave his wife a heart attack
TioJ (10:28:46 PM): trade your sister for a cheeseburger
TioJ (10:29:09 PM): wow zathura
TioJ (10:29:11 PM): i wonder how it ends
TioJ (10:32:10 PM): blackt0r 2
TioJ (10:32:41 PM): blackt0rs 1 and 3
TioJ (10:33:27 PM): " i know what that's like"
TioJ (10:33:40 PM): "is that rectal jelly on your scrubs?"
TioJ (10:34:09 PM): wow where is that?
TioJ (10:34:31 PM): above the Port of Seattle building?
TioJ (10:34:42 PM): and dr. patrick dempsey is a tard
TioJ (10:34:53 PM): how hard is this? you chose your wife so ditch your fuckwad GF already
TioJ (10:34:58 PM): blackt0r 2
TioJ (10:37:11 PM): and this chick sucks
TioJ (10:37:39 PM): wow, they're all talking about dr. ellen and dr. patrick dempsey
TioJ (10:38:03 PM): WTF?
TioJ (10:44:10 PM): blackt0r 1
TioJ (10:44:14 PM): (missed a blackt0r 2)
TioJ (10:44:19 PM): the nurse you dumbass)
TioJ (10:44:27 PM): did everybody but you know that?
TioJ (10:45:16 PM): blackt0r 3
TioJ (10:45:20 PM): blackt0r 1
TioJ (10:46:50 PM): "alex, would you kiss me?"
TioJ (10:47:06 PM): And it's official. They've stopped the series.
TioJ (10:48:38 PM): although that was pretty deep what the frat cockt0r said
TioJ (10:49:39 PM): that ws a stupid end to that storyline
TioJ (10:50:37 PM): how the fuck did all those people get in there like that?
TioJ (10:52:52 PM): blackt0r 2 and george having a moment!
TioJ (10:53:28 PM): and now george is touching blackt0r 2
TioJ (10:53:50 PM): space needle!
TioJ (10:55:16 PM): "i will not be meredith grey"
TioJ (10:56:15 PM): blackt0r 3
TioJ (10:58:00 PM): $485 worth of tickets for the tumor operation
TioJ (10:58:16 PM): frat cockt0r
TioJ (10:58:21 PM): oh he's gonna kiss her
TioJ (10:58:22 PM): duh
TioJ (10:58:32 PM): what a pile of shit
TioJ (10:59:13 PM): ________________
TioJ (10:59:18 PM): GREY'S ANATOMY
TioJ (10:59:19 PM): ________________
TioJ has left the chat room.

this was almost a good scene until i realized there were three black people in a room in Seattle

2005-11-30T09:41:00.000-08:00

Draft from 01 November 2005, 2340hrs.

Welcome, Grey's Anatomy, to the pit that is Tio Jaime: Aleph One. Enjoy your stay.

Tio Jaime

3am Criticism of Grey's Anatomy, demoted to TJ:A1

You are now in chat room "AIMsuckspoop."
JihadJimmyMWCCDF has entered the chat room.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:36:44 PM): hello dere
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:36:57 PM): here's a tape delayed 3am criticism of Grey's Anatomy
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:37:01 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON GREY'S ANATOMY
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:37:11 PM): what a shitty show now
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:37:33 PM): whata stupid woman
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:37:46 PM): "pick me"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:37:52 PM): SHUT THE FUCK UP
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:38:27 PM): wow this is shitty
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:38:37 PM): black orderly!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:39:23 PM): train derailment!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:39:32 PM): this is still gonna be a shitty episode
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:39:41 PM): oh yay he showed up
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:40:42 PM): wow this show is getting relegated to TJ:A1
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:41:19 PM): carnage carnage carnage
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:41:31 PM): morbid doctor shit
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:41:51 PM): oh wonderful
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:42:49 PM): "was that a nod?"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:42:55 PM): wow that was the epidome of gay
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:42:59 PM): epitome
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:43:13 PM): whoa
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:43:32 PM): la la la, shitty theme song, la la la
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:43:39 PM): ooh! they deleted it!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:44:50 PM): blackt0rs, blackt0rs everywhere
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:45:59 PM): breathe mint!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:46:02 PM): for me, not for you!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:46:16 PM): FUCK YOU I HOPE YOU LIKE THE SECOND STRING BLOG
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:47:29 PM): whoa a filipino!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:47:37 PM): and she looks like grace/greta
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (10:48:27 PM): i gotta poo... gonna pause
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:01:45 PM): ooh yeah
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:02:39 PM): i don't recall that many black people in the state of Washington
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:05:32 PM): that was a shitty sequence between dr. HFA and blackt0r 3
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:06:31 PM): what kind of triaging is that?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:06:56 PM): why would you try to save the chick who is more injured?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:08:51 PM): stupdi HFA
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:09:48 PM): stupid george
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:09:54 PM): and stupid dr. ellen pompeo
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:13:17 PM): this blackt0r3/HFA exchange sucks
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:15:37 PM): and now she's playing the BF card... to find a leg?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:15:44 PM): fucking stanfurd trash
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:15:59 PM): that was somewhat funny...
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:16:21 PM): "i was trying to talk boy"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:16:25 PM): and now she's talking izzy
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:16:33 PM): FUCKING STUPID EPISODE
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:16:49 PM): and drunk dr. ellen sucks
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:19:10 PM): this was almost a good scene until i realized there were three black people in a room in Seattle
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:19:36 PM): should've thrown in blackt0r 3 and the black orderly just to make it complete
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:20:30 PM): KRAZY LESBIANS!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:20:37 PM): KRAZY THIRD GRADE LESBIANS!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:20:50 PM): how fucking stupid
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:21:05 PM): oh duh of course her water breaks
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:21:24 PM): and of course the phone rings whenever frat cockt0r is around
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:21:28 PM): what a stupid TV show
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:23:56 PM): another black orderly?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:25:36 PM): fucking black orderlies everywhere you look in goddam Seattle
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:25:41 PM): how fucking fake is this show?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:27:36 PM): and i think yet another black orderly/nurse
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:29:18 PM): how wonderful. you were able to fit in the shitty romance storyline too
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:30:06 PM): GET TO THE FUCKING POINT ALREADY
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:30:17 PM): THAT FUCKING LONG TO FIND OUT THAT HE'S STAYING WITH HER?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:32:33 PM): you stupid drunk whore
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:32:38 PM): fucking follow orders already
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:33:19 PM): and finally an end to the shittiest episode of GA ever
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:33:34 PM): and fuck off already with the rosa parks
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:34:12 PM): oh fuck, episode wasn't finished?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:34:23 PM): oh great
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:34:32 PM): la la la addison shepherd
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:34:43 PM): whatever the fuck ever
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:34:57 PM): how nice to jump the shark so early in teh series
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:37:47 PM): heh,funny how they never again reference blackt0r 1 as The Nazi
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:38:04 PM): HORSE FACE ASIAN
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:39:09 PM): "better get cleaned up. rounds in five minutes"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:39:22 PM): how shitty
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:39:33 PM): next sunday all the stupid fucking doctors
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:39:51 PM): in stupid relationships
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:39:54 PM): and a male pregnancy
JihadJimmyMWCCDFhas left the chat room.

if you live w/your folks, your life isn't quite equipped for a woman... as such, you would need one less

2005-11-30T09:38:00.000-08:00

Draft from 30 September 2005, 0024hrs.

Just two months late w/this chat. Sorry. But here's what guys talk about... ya got some complaining about women we don't know yet, complaining about women we know all too well, and then we somehow magically start talking about trucks.

Cool shit, huh?

Tio Jaime

chatting w/MwHCock. Again.
9/29/05, 11:20 PM TioJ: i need a woman MwHCock: I need one more TioJ: no you don't TioJ: four words: TioJ: LORD TioJ: VOL TioJ: DEE TioJ: MEGAN MwHCock: I don't date band chicks TioJ: no tard TioJ: i'm saying "you don't need a woman more than i do. i need a woman more than you do, because of lord volde-megan" MwHCock: no MwHCock: i need a woman more MwHCock: I live with my parents now MwHCock: my social scene is gonna take a drastic hit 11:25 PM TioJ: if anything, that should allow you some leeway MwHCock: no MwHCock: I won't be able to go out as much TioJ: right, so it's understandable if you don't have one MwHCock: but more importantly, i won't really be able to bring chicks home TioJ: OK and so by that logic, why do you need a woman? MwHCock: which is where I used to work my magic MwHCock: oh, I need a woman MwHCock: but life is not cooperating TioJ: OK look... TioJ: I drive a tacoma 11:30 PM TioJ: how badly do i need a bedliner for a Tundra? TioJ: not at all TioJ: if only because with the car that I have right now, that particular bedliner won't fit MwHCock: get a spray on bedliner MwHCock: we have one for our sierra TioJ: if you live w/your folks, your life isn't quite equipped for a woman... as such, you would need one less MwHCock: they are better TioJ: yeah, in hindsight, i would've liked the spray-on 12:00 AM MwHCock: the spray on is good for 2 reasons MwHCock: 1 - it is rock hard MwHCock: 2 - no water or debris can get under it TioJ: yeah i dig that TioJ: how much is the spray-on shit? MwHCock: I wasn't home when my dad got it

chatting w/MwHCock. Again.

9/29/05, 11:20 PM
TioJ: i need a woman
MwHCock: I need one more
TioJ: no you don't
TioJ: four words:
TioJ: LORD
TioJ: VOL
TioJ: DEE
TioJ: MEGAN
MwHCock: I don't date band chicks
TioJ: no tard
TioJ: i'm saying "you don't need a woman more than i do. i need a woman more than you do, because of lord volde-megan"
MwHCock: no
MwHCock: i need a woman more
MwHCock: I live with my parents now
MwHCock: my social scene is gonna take a drastic hit
11:25 PM
TioJ: if anything, that should allow you some leeway
MwHCock: no
MwHCock: I won't be able to go out as much
TioJ: right, so it's understandable if you don't have one
MwHCock: but more importantly, i won't really be able to bring chicks home
TioJ: OK and so by that logic, why do you need a woman?
MwHCock: which is where I used to work my magic
MwHCock: oh, I need a woman
MwHCock: but life is not cooperating
TioJ: OK look...
TioJ: I drive a tacoma
11:30 PM
TioJ: how badly do i need a bedliner for a Tundra?
TioJ: not at all
TioJ: if only because with the car that I have right now, that particular bedliner won't fit
MwHCock: get a spray on bedliner
MwHCock: we have one for our sierra
TioJ: if you live w/your folks, your life isn't quite equipped for a woman... as such, you would need one less
MwHCock: they are better
TioJ: yeah, in hindsight, i would've liked the spray-on
12:00 AM
MwHCock: the spray on is good for 2 reasons
MwHCock: 1 - it is rock hard
MwHCock: 2 - no water or debris can get under it
TioJ: yeah i dig that
TioJ: how much is the spray-on shit?
MwHCock: I wasn't home when my dad got it

each time i talk to you you're becoming more and more the elitist

2005-11-30T09:35:00.000-08:00

Draft from 21 September 2005, 2112 hrs

Bad enough that a good San Josean is growing into the elitist San Franciscan. Worse that he tries to garner my pity and empathy.

TioJ = me LittleBell = HS/college/band friend
8:36 PM TioJ: i bought an accordion!!! LittleBell: shit dog LittleBell: you crazy TioJ: $100 and only one key doesn't work TioJ: other than that, seems to be OK LittleBell: cool 8:45 PM TioJ: should i play w/my accordion or watch e-ring? LittleBell: e-ring got bad reviews in the chronicle LittleBell: i cant believe i read the chronicle now TioJ: i ain't picky LittleBell: ive turned into one of those san franciscans that actually swears by it TioJ: hey motherfucker, don't try to garner my pity TioJ: each time i talk to you you're becoming more and more the elitist TioJ: you should have kids in the City so they can call themselves "natives" LittleBell: haha 8:50 PM LittleBell: whats up with you, dude TioJ: not much TioJ: oh, date tomorrow TioJ: i really should call that chick to confirm TioJ: gotta go make a phone call TioJ: just please stop telling me how one of my san jose brethren is slowly becoming one of them LittleBell: :) LittleBell: i heard from [HAWT CHICK'S NAME CENSORED] today LittleBell: blast from the past! LittleBell: back in the day i really wanted to poke her

TioJ = me
LittleBell = HS/college/band friend

8:36 PM
TioJ: i bought an accordion!!!
LittleBell: shit dog
LittleBell: you crazy
TioJ: $100 and only one key doesn't work
TioJ: other than that, seems to be OK
LittleBell: cool
8:45 PM
TioJ: should i play w/my accordion or watch e-ring?
LittleBell: e-ring got bad reviews in the chronicle
LittleBell: i cant believe i read the chronicle now
TioJ: i ain't picky
LittleBell: ive turned into one of those san franciscans that actually swears by it
TioJ: hey motherfucker, don't try to garner my pity
TioJ: each time i talk to you you're becoming more and more the elitist
TioJ: you should have kids in the City so they can call themselves "natives"
LittleBell: haha
8:50 PM
LittleBell: whats up with you, dude
TioJ: not much
TioJ: oh, date tomorrow
TioJ: i really should call that chick to confirm
TioJ: gotta go make a phone call
TioJ: just please stop telling me how one of my san jose brethren is slowly becoming one of *them*
LittleBell: :)
LittleBell: i heard from [HAWT CHICK'S NAME CENSORED] today
LittleBell: blast from the past!
LittleBell: back in the day i really wanted to poke her

lemme see what i can do

2005-11-30T09:31:00.000-08:00

old draft from waaay back on 06 July 2005, 1800hrs. The SHoP post should be the one referenced. And if it isn't, you couldn't tell the difference anyway...

chatting w/MwHCock
TioJ: lemme work on a SHoP post 5:40 PM MwHCock: Any post which has pictures of hotties automatically gets bonus points TioJ: lemme see what i can do

note to visitors: journalism isn't a real job

2005-11-30T09:25:00.000-08:00

Draft from 06 September 2005 2157hrs

3am Criticism of Gilmore Girls

You are now in chat room "AIMeatspoop."
TioJ has entered the chat room.
TioJ (8:56:20 PM): hello dere
TioJ (8:56:32 PM): drinking a nice tall GDF
TioJ (8:56:40 PM): gonna 3amC gilmore girls
TioJ (8:56:52 PM): giants just took the lead on the go-ahead suicide squeeze
TioJ (8:57:34 PM): and in AL west action...
TioJ (8:57:49 PM): M's up 3-2 over the a's in the T8
TioJ (8:58:08 PM): but now it's time for gilmore girls
TioJ (8:59:42 PM): Supernatural premieres next week
TioJ (9:00:01 PM): oh
TioJ (9:00:13 PM): advertising the season premeire of GG
TioJ (9:00:28 PM): apparently the episode i'm watching ends in lorelai proposing to luke
TioJ (9:02:00 PM): fucking rich pricks
TioJ (9:02:42 PM): mmm... lauren graham
TioJ (9:03:27 PM): ooh liza weil
TioJ (9:06:29 PM): wow
TioJ (9:06:52 PM): last time i watched gilmore girls, I had a job w/Underground
TioJ (9:07:53 PM): oh great
TioJ (9:07:56 PM): FUCK YOU TAYLOR
TioJ (9:08:05 PM): STFU TAYLOR
TioJ (9:08:44 PM): STFU KIRK
TioJ (9:12:09 PM): oh waaa you have to go find a real job
TioJ (9:12:27 PM): note to visitors: journalism isn't a real job
TioJ (9:13:55 PM): i miss devon
TioJ (9:15:40 PM): devon wasn't in
TioJ (9:15:49 PM): (just tried to call her)
TioJ (9:18:43 PM): hey fuck you troubadour
TioJ (9:26:28 PM): wow this lane thing is annoying
TioJ (9:27:09 PM): annoying storyline
TioJ (9:35:17 PM): and back to the shitty lane storyline
TioJ (9:38:02 PM): go to stanfurd
TioJ (9:39:00 PM): yeah fuck you bikers
TioJ (9:41:16 PM): and now emily's pissed
TioJ (9:42:49 PM): aww yeah triple-teaming rory
TioJ (9:43:28 PM): shit giants-dodgers tied 2-2 in ninth
TioJ (9:43:43 PM): mariners finished, not sure of the score
TioJ (9:51:06 PM): wow i didn't think the lane storyline could get any shittier
TioJ (9:51:36 PM): holy shit, Lorelai Kleavage
TioJ (9:52:01 PM): ooh yeah
TioJ (9:52:03 PM): zoom out
TioJ (9:52:05 PM): zoom out
TioJ (9:52:22 PM): goddamit what a dress
TioJ (9:52:45 PM): this is the best season finale ever!
TioJ (9:53:47 PM): ooh and now her arms are crossed
TioJ (9:53:56 PM): am i supposed to be sad right now?
TioJ (9:54:10 PM): because this was the best Gilmore Girls I've ever seen
TioJ (9:55:01 PM): wow fuck you TAYLOR and KIRK
TioJ (9:55:12 PM): "RORY dropped out of Yale"
TioJ (9:55:18 PM): hey
TioJ (9:55:23 PM): magic dress again!
TioJ (9:56:30 PM): blah blah blah "luke will you marry me"
TioJ (9:56:31 PM): "what"
TioJ (9:57:11 PM): hmm, season premiere next week
TioJ (9:57:17 PM): maybe will see you then
TioJ has left the chat room.

e-mail i sent to trosama min asi

2005-11-16T16:22:00.000-08:00

speaking of trose, check out his blog at sufficeittosay.blogspot.com

to: trose from: jimmy
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20051116/ap_en_tv/tv_dvr_usage No, people aren't watching more TV, they're watching more TV shows. There's a difference. I can watch a TV show on DVD like The Shield, but i've never watched The Shield on TV. Huge difference. Main contentions on TiVO or Replay or whatever shitty DVR is the flavor of the day: 1) 92% of people skipping commericals loses a lot of pop culture. Where would things like "where's the beef" be w/unfettered tivo? 2) easy recording of shows allows for more people to bitch at you when you wanna talk about shows the next day. "no! I have it tivo'ed and i'm gonna watch it friday! don't tell me what happens!" and while this happened for the past 20 years with VCRs, people were too stupid to know how to program them. and those who did know how to program them knew enough to STFU when it came to everybody else who just took the time to watch the show. tio jaime

to: trose
from: jimmy

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20051116/ap_en_tv/tv_dvr_usage

No, people aren't watching more TV, they're watching more TV shows. There's a difference. I can watch a TV show on DVD like The Shield, but i've never watched The Shield on TV. Huge difference.

Main contentions on TiVO or Replay or whatever shitty DVR is the flavor of the day:

1) 92% of people skipping commericals loses a lot of pop culture. Where would things like "where's the beef" be w/unfettered tivo?

2) easy recording of shows allows for more people to bitch at you when you wanna talk about shows the next day. "no! I have it tivo'ed and i'm gonna watch it friday! don't tell me what happens!" and while this happened for the past 20 years with VCRs, people were too stupid to know how to program them. and those who did know how to program them knew enough to STFU when it came to everybody else who just took the time to watch the show.

tio jaime

Funny how TiVO can kill something as enjoyable as "Hey, did you see that commercial for--"

"No."

"Oh yeah. You and your precious TiVO."

so you're saying that dr. ellen is mulatto? & hey, that was a mariners jacket!

2005-10-24T08:48:00.000-07:00

Wow, another 3am Criticism sent down from the majors. It's only a matter of time before TAR:Shitty Family Edition makes its TJ:A1 debut...

And for those of you just joining, Grey's Anatomy is grossly inaccurate along racial lines. Three black doctors (herein, blackt0rs) and buttloads of black nurses and orderlies, but no indian doctors, no filipino nurses? Just some Horse-Faced Asian? What a pile of crap.

You wanna live in a world where a ton of blackt0rs isn't a fantasy? Try listening to this guy every once in a while...

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

Doubleheader 3am Criticism of Last Week's Grey's Anatomy and Last Night's Grey's Anatomy. Hard to tell which one sucked more...

You are now in chat room "GreysAnatomyCatchUp."
TioJ has entered the chat room.
TioJ (8:57:09 PM): hello dere
TioJ (8:57:37 PM): so with one episode on tape for right now, and then the broadcast of tonight's, we should be caught up...
TioJ (8:57:58 PM): although no telling when this'll get posted, as I was planning on letting other posts stay at the top of the SHoP for now...
TioJ (9:02:13 PM): and i rewound a bit too much and here's where Dawn gets eliminated from martha's apprentice
TioJ (9:02:20 PM): dawn.... the one i want to have sex with
TioJ (9:02:21 PM): ooh yeah
TioJ (9:03:17 PM): here we go

TioJ (9:03:31 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON GREY'S ANATOMY
TioJ (9:03:57 PM): The Emerald City Bar!
TioJ (9:04:05 PM): oh great
TioJ (9:04:18 PM): now they shot the dr. izzie/frat cockt0r wad
TioJ (9:05:24 PM): blackt0r 1
TioJ (9:05:44 PM): blackt0r 1!
TioJ (9:06:00 PM): and since when did frat cockt0r get assigned to blackt0r 1?
TioJ (9:06:55 PM): HFA out and about
TioJ (9:07:13 PM): ooh HFA panties
TioJ (9:07:32 PM): HFA-mom!
TioJ (9:08:15 PM): wow HFA has a big nose
TioJ (9:08:23 PM): even bigger than what jimmy likes
TioJ (9:09:01 PM): WTF, haven't we relaxed the patrick dempsey yet?
TioJ (9:09:40 PM): "stop being an adulterous bitch"
TioJ (9:10:52 PM): yay for shittyopening credits!
TioJ (9:11:09 PM): __________
TioJ (9:11:14 PM): GREY'S ANATOMY
TioJ (9:11:18 PM): __________
TioJ (9:11:56 PM): port of seattle!
TioJ (9:11:59 PM): alaskan way?
TioJ (9:12:03 PM): blakct0r 2
TioJ (9:13:40 PM): just when i thought this show couldn't get any more annoying, they introduce a asian mother
TioJ (9:13:52 PM): dr izzie is retarded
TioJ (9:17:32 PM): black orderly?
TioJ (9:17:58 PM): this is shit
TioJ (9:18:44 PM): like you can find four black people in a hospital like that
TioJ (9:18:50 PM): blackt0r 3
TioJ (9:19:02 PM): and now dr. ellen's mom thinks that george is her intern
TioJ (9:19:51 PM): nice job interns
TioJ (9:20:18 PM): this show sucks
TioJ (9:24:40 PM): blackt0r 1 is talking sass
TioJ (9:24:56 PM): blackt0r 2
TioJ (9:26:24 PM): blah blah blah mcdreamy
TioJ (9:27:19 PM): dr ellen's mom out and about
TioJ (9:28:05 PM): talk to your kid and tell him IT'S NOT OK
TioJ (9:31:44 PM): blackt0r 3
TioJ (9:35:11 PM): blackt0r 2
TioJ (9:35:26 PM): frat cockt0r
TioJ (9:35:47 PM): ha ha "you shot me"
TioJ (9:36:03 PM): gonna get some more milk
TioJ (9:36:16 PM): blah blah bblah more relationship shit
TioJ (9:38:55 PM): stupid black orderly
TioJ (9:39:09 PM): NO YOU DI-IN'T
TioJ (9:39:34 PM): blackt0r 3
TioJ (9:39:37 PM): and blackt0r 2
TioJ (9:40:36 PM): whoa
TioJ (9:40:47 PM): so you're saying that dr. ellen is mulatto?
TioJ (9:43:41 PM): blackt0r 1 is human?
TioJ (9:43:59 PM): so far blackt0r 1 is the only one who doesn't suck in this season
TioJ (9:48:42 PM): fuckin HFA
TioJ (9:48:48 PM): what a shitty episode
TioJ (9:48:51 PM): blackt0r 3
TioJ (9:50:33 PM): wow this is shitty
TioJ (9:50:38 PM): what a stupid ending
TioJ (9:53:43 PM): ooh hi dr. izzie
TioJ (9:53:47 PM): wow nice boobs
TioJ (9:53:50 PM): what a stupid woman
TioJ (9:54:10 PM): she's going out w/the same guy who posted underwear pictures of her all over the hospital
TioJ (9:55:18 PM): and the "next grey's anatomy" looks uber-annoying
TioJ (9:55:34 PM): sucks that we're gonna watch it in a couple of minutes
TioJ (9:58:39 PM):

and WTF is wrong w/marcia cross's neck?
TioJ (9:58:42 PM): damn that's ugly
TioJ (9:58:45 PM): these chicks are old
TioJ (10:01:03 PM):

TioJ (10:01:09 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON GREY'S ANATOMY
TioJ (10:02:15 PM): he treated her like crap the entire night... what a stupid dumbfuck cunt of a woman
TioJ (10:03:21 PM): seriously, this show sucks
TioJ (10:03:30 PM): ooh izzie boobs
TioJ (10:04:38 PM): porn
TioJ (10:05:35 PM): shitty opening credits time!
TioJ (10:05:47 PM): ________________
TioJ (10:05:53 PM): GREY'S ANATOMY
TioJ (10:06:02 PM): ________________
TioJ (10:07:13 PM): BLACKT0R 3
TioJ (10:08:22 PM): yeah she's not gonna be the woman to begs him to want her
TioJ (10:09:05 PM): ooh cute asian
TioJ (10:09:18 PM): ooh HAWT asian
TioJ (10:10:49 PM): yay for white people?
TioJ (10:11:11 PM): blackt0r 2
TioJ (10:12:25 PM): blackt0r 1
TioJ (10:12:33 PM): another black dude
TioJ (10:16:07 PM): oh, TERI BAUER is on CinC?
TioJ (10:16:26 PM): "i hate alex"
TioJ (10:16:29 PM): what a dumb cunt
TioJ (10:16:34 PM): a hot cunt, yes, but very dumb
TioJ (10:17:40 PM): w/o my porn!
TioJ (10:17:52 PM): HFA
TioJ (10:17:57 PM): I NEED MY PORN!
TioJ (10:18:48 PM): wow all three blackt0rsin front of the elevator
TioJ (10:19:23 PM): "white girl cultural divide"
TioJ (10:19:25 PM): went to UW
TioJ (10:22:52 PM): ellen degeneres sounded hot
TioJ (10:25:05 PM): was that monica potter?
TioJ (10:27:24 PM): blackt0r 1 and blackt0r 3
TioJ (10:28:59 PM): "porn actually sedated you"
TioJ (10:29:04 PM): how retarded
TioJ (10:30:06 PM): yeah you suck frat cockt0r
TioJ (10:31:03 PM): heh
TioJ (10:31:09 PM): just don't cut into the lung or heart
TioJ (10:35:09 PM): getting poo shivers
TioJ (10:35:21 PM): i'm going to DUMPCON 2
TioJ (10:40:04 PM): shit i missed it
TioJ (10:40:34 PM): the space needle near the hospital
TioJ (10:50:43 PM): maddison shepherd looks like a man
TioJ (10:51:35 PM): blah blah blah
TioJ (10:51:37 PM): what a shitty show
TioJ (10:51:46 PM): "so pick me. choose me. love me"
TioJ (10:51:51 PM): what a weak-assed woman
TioJ (10:52:36 PM): WTF? Cindy Sheehan comes to the bay area calling for civil disobedience?
TioJ (10:52:40 PM): you dumb cunt
TioJ (10:52:46 PM): you want a fight? you got it
TioJ (10:54:00 PM): only in the Liberal bay area does cindy sheehan still get airtime
TioJ (10:54:15 PM): and fuck us all, your SHoP Overlord Tio Jaime lives in this very bay area
TioJ (10:54:21 PM): so you get to read all about it
TioJ (10:56:03 PM): he didn't even know she was married?
TioJ (10:57:21 PM): OK, we're a couple, whatever, don't make a big deal about it
TioJ (10:57:23 PM): how shitty
TioJ (10:58:12 PM): "Besides, I touched a heart today. Porny."
TioJ (10:58:19 PM): hey, that was a mariners jacket!
TioJ (10:59:08 PM): shitty episode
TioJ (10:59:13 PM): ______________
TioJ (10:59:15 PM): GREY'S ANATOMY
TioJ (10:59:22 PM): ______________
TioJ (10:59:48 PM): wow a "not-to-be-missed" Grey's Anatomy
TioJ (10:59:54 PM): whatever the fuck ever
TioJ has left the chat room.

Was gonna go w/the post title using "Besides, I touched a heart today. Porny." but I liked the Mariners one better...

BUTTERFACE! & but the Apprentice? what a pile of shit & well fuck, I'd be embarassed to be Iraqi too

2005-10-24T08:29:00.000-07:00

It finally happened. Have relegated these shitty shows to Tio Jaime: Aleph One. Partially because these shows suck, but also because I wanted to keep other SHoP posts up at the top.

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

Craptacular Wednes-dee Night 3am Criticism Triple-header: E-Ring, The Apprentice: Martha Stewart, OVER * THERE

You are now in chat room "WednesdeeNightTVSucks."
TioJ has entered the chat room.
TioJ (7:50:37 PM): hello dere
TioJ (7:50:54 PM): gotta poo before E-Ring
TioJ (7:59:30 PM): OK we are now at DUMPCON 5
TioJ (8:00:24 PM):

The security of the Nation depends on the men and women blah blah blah
TioJ (8:01:48 PM): some rapage, two dudes stopped it, reporter lists as two US marines attack 14 year old girl
TioJ (8:01:53 PM): BUTTERFACE!
TioJ (8:02:12 PM): how hard would it have been to choose a non-janky chick to play benjamin bratt's GF?
TioJ (8:03:28 PM): and now the surinamians are pissed
TioJ (8:04:58 PM): E•RING
TioJ (8:08:36 PM): i'm here, just working out in the background
TioJ (8:08:40 PM): so far, this episode seems mediocre
TioJ (8:08:56 PM): heh, one of the marines is from just outside of San Francisco
TioJ (8:18:45 PM): OK dammit one of the strippers called, and so i've missed all of the show thus far
TioJ (8:20:32 PM): oh, and it was this stripper too
TioJ (8:20:35 PM): shit
TioJ (8:22:14 PM): FUCK YOU MR. SIX
TioJ (8:36:33 PM): OK i was waiting for the marine brotherhood to come up... and here it is!
TioJ (8:41:30 PM): hmm, Apprentice or Halo?
TioJ (8:41:49 PM): i'm two episodes in the hole, so i don't know what's happening
TioJ (8:41:55 PM): oh, and nor do I care, btw
TioJ (8:42:12 PM): even in spite of my Martha Stewart fixation
TioJ (8:42:22 PM): and apparently my Alexandra Stewart fixation too
TioJ (8:51:05 PM): "I want those Marines home, and w/o casualties"
TioJ (8:51:29 PM): see, that's what happens when you inject "politician" into "soldier"
TioJ (9:04:54 PM): looks like Martha fired the one chick on the Apprentice with whom I wanted to have The Sex
TioJ (9:05:01 PM): gonna shower

TioJ (9:10:40 PM): wow that's shitty
TioJ (9:10:54 PM): break up the good team, just to accomodate the weak links?
TioJ (9:11:01 PM): that's not very business savvy
TioJ (9:24:32 PM): Ok gonna shower now
TioJ (9:24:33 PM): brb
TioJ (9:26:58 PM): oh Christ... FUCK the "Donald"
TioJ (9:27:47 PM): OK seriously, brb
TioJ (9:28:45 PM): I hate that dumb motherfucker
TioJ (9:30:24 PM): how is that dumbfuck still there? i come back after two episodes and they haven't even managed to get rid of him?
TioJ (9:30:27 PM): what a useless team
TioJ (9:32:47 PM): you stupid asian chick. a real leader would've pulled him
TioJ (9:47:39 PM): OK Tio Jaime's back
TioJ (9:48:03 PM): and i think i finished my shower in time for the Second Shittiest 10 minutes on TV today!
TioJ (9:48:22 PM): the Conference room of Martha's Apprentice
TioJ (9:49:08 PM): the shittiest ten minutes is the Boardroom of the original Apprentice
TioJ (9:51:21 PM): dumbass
TioJ (9:51:26 PM): yeah, piss off the cigar-guy
TioJ (9:51:29 PM): and there's the cigar
TioJ (9:53:40 PM): this is so shitty
TioJ (9:54:12 PM): let the contestants duke it out verbally?
TioJ (9:54:16 PM): how shitty
TioJ (9:54:30 PM): on TAR, the teams eliminate themselves
TioJ (9:54:44 PM): from what i remember of Survivor, they speak into a camera?
TioJ (9:55:45 PM): but the Apprentice? what a pile of shit
TioJ (9:56:11 PM): dumbfuck just STFU
TioJ (10:00:30 PM): fired the asian chick

TioJ (10:00:42 PM): season finale of OVER * THERE?
TioJ (10:00:49 PM): ooh nicky aycox
TioJ (10:03:24 PM): nice job Dimfuck
TioJ (10:05:37 PM): LOL
TioJ (10:05:40 PM): OK that was funny
TioJ (10:05:42 PM): OVER * THERE
TioJ (10:08:42 PM): Romolo!
TioJ (10:15:58 PM): oh the hybrid synergy drive is it?
TioJ (10:16:29 PM): is this the same one that gets an area per gallon?
TioJ (10:16:41 PM): m²pg, right?
TioJ (10:21:45 PM): IT'S NOT OK
TioJ (10:23:12 PM): "that sound like prejudice to you Dim? Am I not being politically correct?"
TioJ (10:23:33 PM): yeah take that Cornell
TioJ (10:24:35 PM): well fuck, I'd be embarassed to be Iraqi too
TioJ (10:24:55 PM): fuck you Dim
TioJ (10:26:04 PM): ooh cute hair on Mrs. B
TioJ (10:28:57 PM): ooh, Prison Break marathon!
TioJ (10:51:26 PM): FUCK YOU TERRORIST
TioJ (10:52:14 PM): whoa romolo
TioJ (10:53:17 PM): oh bogus
TioJ (10:53:32 PM): the hot chick's husband is dead
TioJ (10:53:45 PM): perfect time for a shitty theme song!
TioJ (10:59:05 PM): oh next wednesday is the season finale
TioJ has left the chat room.

Quite possibly the stupidest blog-quiz I've taken in Tio Jaime Nation history!

2005-10-12T15:16:00.000-07:00

You Are Fall Flowers

Beautiful yet often forgotten.

What Part of Fall Are You?

found at House of Snark

And with that plug, don't let this quiz dissuade you from visiting the Snark, as the rest of her site is top-notch. and she likes The Amazing Race, too...

tio jaime

that's not a real post

2005-10-06T22:38:00.000-07:00

Try to do somebody a favor, and he takes a shit on you. I should put up a MIDI as punishment.

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

MwHCock doesn't appreciate the effort his Tio Jaime puts forth to placate his blog-hankerin'
10:20 PM MwHCock: good night old man TioJ: hold up dude MwHCock: Auto-reply: I am away from my computer. MwHCock: sup? TioJ: gimme two minutes and you'll hav ea new post MwHCock: ok 10:30 PM MwHCock: Auto-reply: I am away from my computer. TioJ: OK there you go MwHCock: that's not a real post TioJ: WTF of course it is MwHCock: no original content on your part MwHCock: You didn't even add a snazy paragraph after MwHCock: with witty criticism or insight 10:35 PM MwHCock: ok, I am serioulsy gonna sleep now TioJ: WTF MwHCock: work in morning TioJ: OK dude MwHCock: I'm just giving you a hard time MwHCock: night man TioJ: you watching ucla this weekend? MwHCock: I am heading out to SF for a friend's birthday, so I doubt it TioJ: i see how it is MwHCock: we are not favored TioJ: yeah i saw that MwHCock: the line is UCLA -1 TioJ: was -2 on monday MwHCock: ESPN picks us to win MwHCock: they say our defense is better MwHCock: but we also just lost a starting tackle for the season MwHCock: so we'll see how the run game goes MwHCock: ok, go bears MwHCock: night TioJ: go bears TioJ: see ya

MwHCock doesn't appreciate the effort his Tio Jaime puts forth to placate his blog-hankerin'

10:20 PM
MwHCock: good night old man
TioJ: hold up dude
MwHCock: Auto-reply: I am away from my computer.
MwHCock: sup?
TioJ: gimme two minutes and you'll hav ea new post
MwHCock: ok
10:30 PM
MwHCock: Auto-reply: I am away from my computer.
TioJ: OK there you go
MwHCock: that's not a real post
TioJ: WTF of course it is
MwHCock: no original content on your part
MwHCock: You didn't even add a snazy paragraph after
MwHCock: with witty criticism or insight
10:35 PM
MwHCock: ok, I am serioulsy gonna sleep now
TioJ: WTF
MwHCock: work in morning
TioJ: OK dude
MwHCock: I'm just giving you a hard time
MwHCock: night man
TioJ: you watching ucla this weekend?
MwHCock: I am heading out to SF for a friend's birthday, so I doubt it
TioJ: i see how it is
MwHCock: we are not favored
TioJ: yeah i saw that
MwHCock: the line is UCLA -1
TioJ: was -2 on monday
MwHCock: ESPN picks us to win
MwHCock: they say our defense is better
MwHCock: but we also just lost a starting tackle for the season
MwHCock: so we'll see how the run game goes
MwHCock: ok, go bears
MwHCock: night
TioJ: go bears
TioJ: see ya

will you go to prom with me?

2005-10-06T22:19:00.000-07:00

You gotta give the ~~people~~ person what ~~they~~ he want(s).

chatting with MwHCock on a fine Thurs-dee night
9:30 PM TioJ: i just met The Flood MwHCock: the flood suck ass TioJ: it was Ok until the big flood dudes started following me TioJ: and then they started jumping from floor to floor MwHCock: and blowing up TioJ: no, they haven't done that yet 10:00 PM MwHCock: http://www.ebaumsworld.com/videos/gotoprom.html MwHCock: that poor chick probably didn't think that would get posted all over 10:05 PM MwHCock: http://littlegreenfootballs.com/weblog/?entry=17556 TioJ: old news man... you gotta pay closer attention to the right-wing blogosphere 10:10 PM MwHCock: so.... MwHCock: will you go to prom with me? TioJ: is that a real song? MwHCock: i never heard it before MwHCock: your other blog need updating 10:15 PM TioJ: I FUCKING POSTED TEN TIMES IN ONE DAY ON THE SHOP MwHCock: but you ignore your own blog TioJ: nobody reads that one MwHCock: i do TioJ: you shouldn't MwHCock: but i do

chatting with MwHCock on a fine Thurs-dee night

9:30 PM
TioJ: i just met The Flood
MwHCock: the flood suck ass
TioJ: it was Ok until the big flood dudes started following me
TioJ: and then they started jumping from floor to floor
MwHCock: and blowing up
TioJ: no, they haven't done that yet
10:00 PM
MwHCock: http://www.ebaumsworld.com/videos/gotoprom.html
MwHCock: that poor chick probably didn't think that would get posted all over
10:05 PM
MwHCock: http://littlegreenfootballs.com/weblog/?entry=17556
TioJ: old news man... you gotta pay closer attention to the right-wing blogosphere
10:10 PM
MwHCock: so....
MwHCock: will you go to prom with me?
TioJ: is that a real song?
MwHCock: i never heard it before
MwHCock: your other blog need updating
10:15 PM
TioJ: I FUCKING POSTED TEN TIMES IN ONE DAY ON THE SHOP
MwHCock: but you ignore your own blog
TioJ: nobody reads that one
MwHCock: i do
TioJ: you shouldn't
MwHCock: but i do

And how do you argue w/that logic?

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

i scare myself sometimes

2005-09-18T23:08:00.000-07:00

perhaps i'll uncensor the chat as the Tio Jaime Nation Ministry of Information and Disinformation permits. Stay chuned.

sun-dee night chat!
11:02 PM TioJ: so as the [CENSORED], is it my job to execute any skeletons in your closet? TioJ: perhaps take your exes fishing in the Berkeley Marina in my new boat? TioJ: see that your enemies have "accidents" when they're on their way to work? 11:05 PM SixH: yeah dude. :) SixH: you're scaring Shiraz. :P TioJ: oh that's fucking sweet TioJ: i scare myself sometimes TioJ: oh man, what a freaky coincidence... SixH: how so? TioJ: was reading a giants recap after i asked you that initial question... SixH: I'm talking to my folks. TioJ: The mother of Laci Peterson, Sharon Rocha, threw out the ceremonial first pitch as the Giants held a "Resolve to stop the violence" ceremony before the game. A photo was shown on the big screen of Laci, whose husband Scott was sentenced to death for killing her and the couple's unborn child. SixH: dude, that's not right. TioJ: i'll get a boat SixH: ok, dude.

sun-dee night chat!

11:02 PM
TioJ: so as the [CENSORED], is it my job to execute any skeletons in your closet?
TioJ: perhaps take your exes fishing in the Berkeley Marina in my new boat?
TioJ: see that your enemies have "accidents" when they're on their way to work?
11:05 PM
SixH: yeah dude. :)
SixH: you're scaring Shiraz. :P
TioJ: oh that's fucking sweet
TioJ: i scare myself sometimes
TioJ: oh man, what a freaky coincidence...
SixH: how so?
TioJ: was reading a giants recap after i asked you that initial question...
SixH: I'm talking to my folks.
TioJ: The mother of Laci Peterson, Sharon Rocha, threw out the ceremonial first pitch as the Giants held a "Resolve to stop the violence" ceremony before the game. A photo was shown on the big screen of Laci, whose husband Scott was sentenced to death for killing her and the couple's unborn child.
SixH: dude, that's not right.
TioJ: i'll get a boat
SixH: ok, dude.

Enjoy the upcoming mon-dee. I know i will.

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

Welcome, SHoP Refugees

2005-09-04T17:17:00.000-07:00

All thee seeking political correctness asylum from the Minitrue, seek what hath been deprived from ye here...

OK let's get down and dirty... anything censored down below? check out Tio Jaime: Aleph One to fill in the blanks...

I wonder if that reprobate can even read.
TioJ: ooh found something naughty on totalfark 11:15 PM SixH: God, I wanna kill that Kanye West asshole. TioJ: url? SixH: http://gorillamask.net/kanyebush.shtml SixH: dude couldn't string a sentence together if his life depended on it. TioJ: Kanye West: "George Bush doesn't care about black people." TioJ: well fuck is this a complaint, or a invitation? 11:20 PM TioJ: heh, i like how you can see Mike Myers shooting mind bullets over to that kid saying "SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP. NOW!!!" SixH: I know! SixH: He wasn't reading from the teleprompter, couldn't you tell? TioJ: OK i'm sorry, you know what? fuck the red cross. TioJ: you wanna try to garner my sympathy that way? SixH: I wonder if that reprobate can even read. TioJ: good call. I'm gonna go out and buy NCAA 06 Football now SixH: haha TioJ: no i was listening to him.... he wasn't speaking full-on ebonics TioJ: he was using verbs and conjugation TioJ: so i think he was trying to look smart TioJ: but he found himself floundering, so he just resorted to the "Bush sucks!" type of leftist bullshit TioJ: that's cool, asshole. I'm buying a video game in honor of your brothers trapped in New Orleans. TioJ: leave it to me to find a way to give the Red Cross a big, giant Fuck You

I wonder if that reprobate can even read.

TioJ: ooh found something naughty on totalfark
11:15 PM
SixH: God, I wanna kill that Kanye West asshole.
TioJ: url?
SixH: http://gorillamask.net/kanyebush.shtml
SixH: dude couldn't string a sentence together if his life depended on it.
TioJ: Kanye West: "George Bush doesn't care about black people."
TioJ: well fuck is this a complaint, or a invitation?
11:20 PM
TioJ: heh, i like how you can see Mike Myers shooting mind bullets over to that kid saying "SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP. NOW!!!"
SixH: I know!
SixH: He wasn't reading from the teleprompter, couldn't you tell?
TioJ: OK i'm sorry, you know what? fuck the red cross.
TioJ: you wanna try to garner my sympathy *that* way?
SixH: I wonder if that reprobate can even read.
TioJ: good call. I'm gonna go out and buy NCAA 06 Football now
SixH: haha
TioJ: no i was listening to him.... he wasn't speaking full-on ebonics
TioJ: he was using verbs and conjugation
TioJ: so i think he was *trying* to look smart
TioJ: but he found himself floundering, so he just resorted to the "Bush sucks!" type of leftist bullshit
TioJ: that's cool, asshole. I'm buying a video game in honor of your brothers trapped in New Orleans.
TioJ: leave it to me to find a way to give the Red Cross a big, giant Fuck You

That last line just about sums up your good buddy Tio Jaime. It's not my sole purpose in life to find the way to find that way, but trust me when I say that I can. I'll be over here if you guys need me...

Condi? Sellout.
SixH: You notice how sellout blacks are the normal, successful ones, while the "hero" blacks are the thug sports celebrities and rappers? 11:25 PM SixH: Condi? Sellout. TioJ: oh yeah. she was a House Negress. TioJ: A regular Aunt Jemima. SixH: Justice Thomas? Sellout. TioJ: More like Justice Uncle Tom SixH: yup

If you couldn't recognize the sarcasm above, perhaps the SHoP is not right for you? Rarely will i want to discourage regular readers from visiting, but really, with your interests in mind, maybe you can glean entertainment from a less intelligent site? Check out SixH's friends from a few posts ago...

And before I forget, check TJ:A1 to see the mild racial invectives that ~~the Minitrue~~ SixH probably wouldn't want on the SHoP...

How dare they make it so quick an argument about race.
SixH: and then you have the black caucus. SixH: which just about made me want to throw my TV out of the window. SixH: Unbelievable what they get away with. TioJ: what'd they say? SixH: http://www.cnn.com/2005/POLITICS/09/02/black.lawmakers.ap/index.html SixH: How dare they make it so quick an argument about race. SixH: to hell with them all, I say. TioJ: fuck em! SixH: I'm not helping a goddam one of them. TioJ: fuck it, let's give 'em reparations in the form of one way tickets back to precious Africa SixH: Just like I didn't help any of those indonesian, america-hating bastards. TioJ: the ones who wear Osama t-shirts? SixH: haha SixH: yup SixH: be careful about posting this, dude. TioJ: yeah that's just what I was thinking TioJ: perhaps an uncensored version @ TJ:A1 SixH: oh god. SixH: :D 11:30 PM TioJ: WTF? TioJ: Watson and others also took issue with the word "refugee" being used to describe hurricane victims."'Refugee' calls up to mind people that come from different lands and have to be taken care of. These are American citizens," Watson said.Added Rep. Elijah Cummings, D-Maryland: "They are not refugees. I hate that word." TioJ: yeah waste our fucking time arguing about semantics and political correctness SixH: That's why they get the big bucks. TioJ: AND THEY'RE GODDAM SEEKING REFUGE! TioJ: WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DO YOU WANT TO CALL THEM?

How dare they make it so quick an argument about race.

SixH: and then you have the black caucus.
SixH: which just about made me want to throw my TV out of the window.
SixH: Unbelievable what they get away with.
TioJ: what'd they say?
SixH: http://www.cnn.com/2005/POLITICS/09/02/black.lawmakers.ap/index.html
SixH: How dare they make it so quick an argument about race.
SixH: to hell with them all, I say.
TioJ: fuck em!
SixH: I'm not helping a goddam one of them.
TioJ: fuck it, let's give 'em reparations in the form of one way tickets back to precious Africa
SixH: Just like I didn't help any of those indonesian, america-hating bastards.
TioJ: the ones who wear Osama t-shirts?
SixH: haha
SixH: yup
SixH: be careful about posting this, dude.
TioJ: yeah that's just what I was thinking
TioJ: perhaps an uncensored version @ TJ:A1
SixH: oh god.
SixH: :D
11:30 PM
TioJ: WTF?
TioJ: Watson and others also took issue with the word "refugee" being used to describe hurricane victims."'Refugee' calls up to mind people that come from different lands and have to be taken care of. These are American citizens," Watson said.Added Rep. Elijah Cummings, D-Maryland: "They are not refugees. I hate that word."
TioJ: yeah waste our fucking time arguing about semantics and political correctness
SixH: That's why they get the big bucks.
TioJ: AND THEY'RE GODDAM SEEKING REFUGE!
TioJ: WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DO YOU WANT TO CALL THEM?

And again, as before. Something somewhat racially insensitive censored above.

Family guy stuff

2005-08-16T15:59:00.000-07:00

I'd also like to voice concern that I watched Family Guy this past sun-dee and was disappointingly unimpressed. The jokes lasted too long sometimes and just weren't funny. It's only a funny show when they have baby Stewie and Brian the dog segments. Aside from that, King of the Hill is a lot funnier.

Tio J

I dunno why, but this one is hilarious.
12:30 AM SixH: some samples of good clips: http://gorillamask.net/famguyarchive.shtml SixH: http://gorillamask.net/famguypuke.shtml SixH: I dunno why, but this one is hilarious. SixH: to me TioJ: oh fuck me hard that's hilarious! TioJ: what was it they drank @ the beginning? 12:35 AM SixH: epicac SixH: TioJ: tha'ts gross, but the funniest thing i sw today TioJ: and i read that WWII dealie like three times SixH: haha SixH: http://gorillamask.net/famguybreakfast.shtml SixH: remember the Pee Wee's big adventure movie? TioJ: yeah SixH: watch it! SixH: http://gorillamask.net/famguyaids.shtml is good too TioJ: of fuck me that was hilarious! SixH: you've got the AIDS! 12:40 AM TioJ: OK time for bed SixH: night SixH: me too SixH: bye

I dunno why, but this one is hilarious.

12:30 AM
SixH: some samples of good clips: http://gorillamask.net/famguyarchive.shtml
SixH: http://gorillamask.net/famguypuke.shtml
SixH: I dunno why, but this one is hilarious.
SixH: to me
TioJ: oh fuck me hard that's hilarious!
TioJ: what was it they drank @ the beginning?
12:35 AM
SixH: epicac
SixH:
TioJ: tha'ts gross, but the funniest thing i sw today
TioJ: and i read that WWII dealie like three times
SixH: haha
SixH: http://gorillamask.net/famguybreakfast.shtml
SixH: remember the Pee Wee's big adventure movie?
TioJ: yeah
SixH: watch it!
SixH: http://gorillamask.net/famguyaids.shtml is good too
TioJ: of fuck me that was hilarious!
SixH: you've got the AIDS!
12:40 AM
TioJ: OK time for bed
SixH: night
SixH: me too
SixH: bye

Talkin' Movies...

2005-08-16T15:40:00.000-07:00

Saw War of the Worlds last night. Good flick, pretty much what you'd expect from a movie about aliens shooting shit up. No boobies, but i wasn't even looking for any.

Practically speaking, if aliens were trying to exterminate the human race, I think many more of our species would be naked with each other, making the beast with two backs-- alien vaporization be damned. But no, none of that. Just aliens and running from aliens and outsmarting aliens and [spoiler]
shoving hand grenades into aliens.
[/spoiler] Nice that unlike Independence Day, it didn't involve a fuity Jeff Goldblum flying an alien craft into an alien mothership and uploading a human virus with an Apple Macintosh.

And yes, "fruity Jeff Goldblum" is redundant. Eff that shitty actor.

Went to see "The Great Raid" over the weekend w/my folks and my little brother and my grandfather. My other grandfather (paternal, passed away in 1989-90?, engineer) was actually in the Bataan Death March when he was an officer in the Philippine Army. Was almost left for dead by Japanese occupation forces. The difference between real life and the movie was probably that back during WWII they probably didn't look as Korean as they did this past weekend.

Cool moment: my grandfather and i were the only ones in the theater laughing when the sergeant emptied his revolver into the already dead Japanese-dude. If we had any sense of shame, I wouldn't have immortalized that little filipino-tidbit here on TJA1. I wanted to yell "Don't fuck with America, you fuckin' Gookers!" but my mom was sitting three seats away. And I don't think that the outside world has the same sense of humor as you readers do. Thank God.

And it could've been because I was up at 6 that morning taking a friend to the airport, but more likely because they Pearl Harbored the movie up. They started diluting the story with some faggy romance crap, sans Faith Hill. Consequently, I fell asleep. I think i started snoring when it got kinda slow and drama-tastic.

Luckily I woke up right before they started shooting shit up. And ooh yeah, that was some cool shit-shooting-up.

And much to my dismay, I found in the closing credits that the chick in the movie was Gladiator's Connie Nielsen! Dammit! The one thing that would've kept me awake and they didn't even tell me until after the shooting part. WTF. Oh, and speaking of chicks, WTF was up w/the Filipinas in the movie? They were all janky! Not a good looking one in the bunch! Well, except for the nurse (heh) who was shot somewhere in the middle, but that's it.

Anyway, final word? Go see War of the Worlds. Don't see The Great Raid even if you're the biggest Connie Nielsen fan in the world.

Charlie and the Chocolate Poop Museum update: good review here. This actually pretty much sums up my feelings towards the new Wonka iteration. Entertaining movie, but Johnny Depp ruins quite a bit of it.

"But what should have been its selling point is its liability. Depp’s one-joke performance makes the film a confection with a hollow center"
On perhaps a subconscious level, Burton made the title change because in his film young Charlie, as played by Freddie Highmore, is far more captivating than reclusive candy man Willy Wonka. What makes this both a disappointment and a shock is that Burton tapped his friend Johnny Depp to play Wonka. Depp has been on a winning streak since “Pirates of the Caribbean,” and two of his most brilliant early performances were in Burton’s “Edward Scissorhands” and “Ed Wood.” Knowing this, you expect a performance to be savored longer than an Everlasting Gobstopper. The ultimate quirky actor playing the ultimate quirky character. Potential damage to children’s psyches aside, what could go wrong? Unfortunately, actor and role short-circuit each other. Depp’s Willy Wonka is a gimmick instead of a character. His performance is a collection of ticks and tricks. He’s Emo Phillips playing Howard Hughes, a clockwork recluse in a sugarplum prison of his own design. That’s not to say Depp isn’t funny. He often is. But his Wonka is just a joke clothed in a purple coat and top hat. Watching Depp push too hard makes you appreciate how marvelous Wilder was as Wonka. Wilder delightfully slid between sane and barmy, but beyond the weirdness you sensed a brilliant mind, and beyond that a person. The magic emanating from Wilder brought the chocolate factory to life. In the new film, the magic of the chocolate factory threatens to crush Depp. Aside from Depp, almost everything else in “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory” is an improvement on the older film.

"But what should have been its selling point is its liability. Depp’s one-joke performance makes the film a confection with a hollow center"

On perhaps a subconscious level, Burton made the title change because in his film young Charlie, as played by Freddie Highmore, is far more captivating than reclusive candy man Willy Wonka. What makes this both a disappointment and a shock is that Burton tapped his friend Johnny Depp to play Wonka.

Depp has been on a winning streak since “Pirates of the Caribbean,” and two of his most brilliant early performances were in Burton’s “Edward Scissorhands” and “Ed Wood.”

Knowing this, you expect a performance to be savored longer than an Everlasting Gobstopper. The ultimate quirky actor playing the ultimate quirky character. Potential damage to children’s psyches aside, what could go wrong?

Unfortunately, actor and role short-circuit each other. Depp’s Willy Wonka is a gimmick instead of a character. His performance is a collection of ticks and tricks. He’s Emo Phillips playing Howard Hughes, a clockwork recluse in a sugarplum prison of his own design.

That’s not to say Depp isn’t funny. He often is. But his Wonka is just a joke clothed in a purple coat and top hat.

Watching Depp push too hard makes you appreciate how marvelous Wilder was as Wonka. Wilder delightfully slid between sane and barmy, but beyond the weirdness you sensed a brilliant mind, and beyond that a person. The magic emanating from Wilder brought the chocolate factory to life. In the new film, the magic of the chocolate factory threatens to crush Depp.

Aside from Depp, almost everything else in “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory” is an improvement on the older film.

Review brings up a good point. Why change the name back to "Charlie and the Poop Chute" when your star plays Willy Wonka? Why not just stick to "Willy Wonka and the Poop Chute"? Were you afraid we'd compare Gene Wilder with Johnny Depp if you didn't rename the movie? Need I point out to you that we did anyway?

You want to be entertained for a couple of hours? Go see War of the Worlds. Don't waste your time with this Chocolate Factory diarrhea of the mind.

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

Movie recommendations

2005-07-31T02:14:00.000-07:00

Don't see Charlie and the C&C Music Factory or whatever the hell it's called. The movie starts taking a shit at Johnny Depp's first voice-over. Doesn't get any better. I expected a buttload more. And also a buttload less Johnny Depp. Don't get me wrong, I loved him in that Keira Knightley movie. But Sweet Merciful Crap, he wasn't that funny as Willy Wonka and WHY MUST THESE LITTLE BRAINS IN THE THEATER KEEP LAUGHING AT HIS SHITTY THROWAWAY LINES?

And why did you Little Brains all collectively gasp in surprise when charlie found the golden ticket? Did you seriously think that they left that part out?

Grandpa Joe dancing? Not funny. Stop laughing like retarded hyenas.

And why must you screw around w/the plot like that, huh? Leaving out Slugworth? Oh wonderful, so the way that Charlie wins the factory is by Johnny Wonka turning around and realizing he's the last kid left? WTF? Oh yay, of course you should make him walk into the Great Glass Elevator. Twice. That would be Great.

Was I supposed to like the 21st century Oompa Loompas? Because they made me want to commit War Crimes. Seriously. And with exception of the third oompa loompa song in this new monstrosity, the rest of the new oompa loompa "improvisations" made me long for the oft-too-repeated-by-my-contemporaries old school oompa loompa songs. And if you know your jimmy history, the old ones made me want to defecate.

Speaking of which. The movie kinda peaked at the Indian chocolate castle. Because when it started to melt on the prince's and concubine-chick's faces i immediately thought, "Oh cool, at least this is going degenerate into a Scheisse film!" But no. Yet another of my hopes was dashed upon the rocks. Clubbed like a baby seal. Beaten like a rented mule. Humiliated like John Kerry and the Democruddy "party".

Seriously. How do you lose to W? Maybe I'm just falling victim to this Bay Area perception. Yeah, I thank God that the rest of America isn't as retarded as everybody around me.

And with that political commentary, this TJ:A1 post has earned a plug on the SHoP.

Last movie is Wedding Crashers. Funny-assed movie! But unfortunately it's a lot like Full Metal Jacket. Starts off nicely and the first half is memorable w/tons of sound bites and cool screen caps (heh boobies) (oh holy shit there were a ton of boobies), but much like how the second half of FMJ kinda trailed off, so too did Wedding Crashers. If i remember correctly, the uninteresting half of the movie began w/the bike ride. Very nice that both movies' first halves ended w/gunplay.

There, I shouldn't have ruined anything for anybody. I recommend Wedding Crashers, despite my disdain for Owen Wilson. And interestingly, I recommend taking a hammer to your non-dominant hand over Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, despite my affinity for Johnny Depp.

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

quiz time

2005-07-20T22:20:00.000-07:00

Wanted to go to Fenton's, but was feeling kinda lazy... found this quiz instead.

Forgot where, but look in the House of Snark and try the link right below the SHoP's trackback...

You Are Chocolate Chip Ice Cream

You are kind, popular, and generous.
You tend to be successful at anything you try.
A social butterfly, you are great at entertaining a crowd.
You are most compatible with strawberry ice cream.

What Flavor Ice Cream Are You?

Ocean's Twelve Sucks Butt

2005-07-17T22:45:00.000-07:00

Watching Ocean's Twelve right now. Oh wonderful. Tess Ocean looks like Julia Roberts? Yes, thanks for reminding us just how many big names went into making this huge Cleveland Steamer of a sequel.

And this ending just got really predictable. Great.

i miss Vegas,
Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

[update time=2255]
Did i say predictable? I meant craptacular.
[/update]

there's no crying in 24!

2005-07-13T00:13:00.000-07:00

3am Criticism of 24 Season Two, 7am - 8am... SEASON FINALE!
You are now in chat room “AIMisHomolicious.”
JihadJimmyMWCCDF has entered the chat room.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:20:20 PM): hello dere
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:20:23 PM): OK last episode
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:20:37 PM): nevermind that it's taken me over a year to watch this season
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:20:45 PM): http://tjalephone.blogspot.com/2004/05/public-429-am.html
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:21:02 PM): (i reserve the right to edit the above URL
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:21:28 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON 24
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:21:32 PM): TONY ALMEIDA!!!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:21:47 PM): ooh ann-chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:21:49 PM): KIM BAUER!!!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:22:14 PM): ~~PRESIDENT~~ DAVID PALMER!!!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:22:18 PM): JACK BAUER!!!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:22:43 PM): oh yeah
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:22:54 PM): THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 7:00 AM AND 8:00 AM
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:23:03 PM): is nosferatu chick dead?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:23:06 PM): oh no she's still alive
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:23:12 PM): oops
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:23:15 PM): truck is broken
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:23:22 PM): seat belt is jammed
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:23:27 PM): WTF?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:24:04 PM): should've shot her when he had the chance
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:24:29 PM): OK way to confuse us in the last episode
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:24:41 PM): hey she's back
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:24:50 PM): heh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:25:01 PM): knife in the glovebox
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:25:14 PM): yeah MIKE NOVICK
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:25:34 PM): ooh it's a file on peter kingsley
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:25:47 PM): phone calls to jonathan wallace that coral snake dude
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:25:57 PM): planes reaching targets w/in hour
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:26:12 PM): yay collateral damage
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:26:57 PM): yeah that's right Chappelle-bitch
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:27:07 PM): yeah just do it you bitch
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:27:28 PM): ooh cleavage
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:27:42 PM): OK so who's this dude?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:27:54 PM): and i'm guessing he's not in LA?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:28:11 PM): ooh yeah ann-chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:28:27 PM): heh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:28:34 PM): TONY ALMEIDA playing the smart-ass card
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:28:48 PM): yah whatever
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:28:49 PM): heh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:29:24 PM): ooh vampire-cleavage
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:29:51 PM): isn't that civvie wondering why the first-bitch is stealing his car?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:29:54 PM): 7:08:41
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:30:00 PM): 7:13:05
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:30:22 PM): so why are these bad guys still hanging around LA whena nuke was supposed to have gone off?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:30:34 PM): heh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:30:38 PM): "i was released"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:30:45 PM): and tony is no longer on crutches
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:31:05 PM): ann-nemecunt
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:31:16 PM): ooh yeah she's looking kinda good
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:31:40 PM): ooh terrorist-bride!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:31:50 PM): terrorist-dad
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:31:56 PM): ooh she looks pisssed
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:32:15 PM): ooh yeah nickelodeon chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:32:34 PM): this is kinda stupid
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:32:45 PM): but i guess with EVENTS OCCURRING IN REAL TIME you gotta fill some space
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:33:11 PM): ooh yeah that chick looks all tore-up
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:33:22 PM): hot-terrorist-style
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:33:39 PM): Daddy's Little Terrorist
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:33:49 PM): Kate
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:33:52 PM): ooh momma
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:34:10 PM): ooh yeah momma in chains
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:34:47 PM): spooky terrorist-chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:36:05 PM): eff the LA coliseum
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:36:37 PM): hey, i've seen U$C lose to cal there three times
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:36:45 PM): ooh yeah take your jacketoff
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:37:24 PM): 7:20:28
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:37:30 PM): 7:24:52
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:38:59 PM): ooh yah alrady 10 mins past the meeting time
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:39:04 PM): ooh they're going
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:39:23 PM): oh she's scared
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:39:38 PM): serves you right you vampire-skank
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:39:59 PM): oh OK she's kind of a good guy now
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:40:01 PM): nice
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:40:31 PM): Heart Attack JACK
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:40:51 PM): ~~PRESIDENT~~ DAVID PALMER
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:42:04 PM): terrorist-first-lady!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:42:26 PM): oh i've marched through there
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:42:35 PM): the clock said 7:30
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:42:39 PM): uh oh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:42:41 PM): sniper rifle
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:42:46 PM): 7:30:07
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:42:51 PM): 7:34:31
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:43:05 PM): OK so she's been standing there for 4 minutes
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:43:17 PM): ooh yeah
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:43:24 PM): FUCK $C
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:43:41 PM): I LIKE HOW THEY SNUCK THE CLOCK IN
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:43:46 PM): i like how they snuck the clock in
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:44:07 PM): ooh yeah vampire chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:46:13 PM): whoa
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:46:32 PM): uh oh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:46:35 PM): he's calling her bluff
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:46:45 PM): uh oh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:46:51 PM): oops, wher'es your sniper
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:46:53 PM): nice
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:46:58 PM): GET SOME MOTHERFUCKER
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:47:03 PM): FUCK YEAH
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:47:07 PM): YEAH YOU BITCHES
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:47:11 PM): GONNA GET ALL JACK BAUER ON YOUR ASSES
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:47:15 PM): RUN MOMMA RUN
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:47:22 PM): DON'T FUCKING STOP RUJNNING
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:47:43 PM): YEAH RUN ZIPPER HEAD
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:47:49 PM): where'd the old dude go?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:47:53 PM): oh he's on the move
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:47:57 PM): RUN MOMMA RUN
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:48:09 PM): did he take out that last dude on the field?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:48:21 PM): wow i've never seen the inside of the stadium
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:48:26 PM): yeah fuck you terrorist
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:48:29 PM): GET SOME
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:48:41 PM): EAT IT FUCKER
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:48:46 PM): SHOOT HIS SHIT
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:49:02 PM): AND JACK JUST BROKE HIS NECK ALL JACK-BAUER STYLE
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:49:10 PM): THAT WAS FUCKING RAD
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:49:16 PM): SHIT
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:49:27 PM): i reserve the right to fix that tag
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:49:36 PM): peter kingsley looks pissed
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:49:47 PM): oops
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:49:50 PM): empty
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:49:58 PM): well watch, so is peter kingsley's
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:50:12 PM): what w/firing at the sniper's position
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:50:25 PM): whoops
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:50:34 PM): CTU CHOPPER, MOTHERFUCKER
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:51:03 PM): hmm
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:51:10 PM): maybe you should call off the bombers or something
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:51:26 PM): ABORT ABORT
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:51:30 PM): missed the timestamp
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:51:33 PM): 7:47:30
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:51:41 PM): oh wait, there's one more climax?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:52:02 PM): ooh hot waitress w/glasses and her hair up
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:52:39 PM): la la
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:52:53 PM): we're sorry we voted against you and shit
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:53:47 PM): well, "strictest standards of proof" is probably a fairytale
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:53:55 PM): but really who am i to say?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:54:08 PM): yay!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:54:19 PM): this is the part where they're supposed to throw up their papers and cheer!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:54:22 PM): they're not cheering
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:54:41 PM): yay for the benevolent black presi-dude
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:54:57 PM): oh yes yes
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:55:07 PM): aww yeah nice job 11th Hour Mike!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:55:37 PM): ha ha
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:55:40 PM): nice job mike
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:55:42 PM): are you crying?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:55:47 PM): there's no crying in 24!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:56:24 PM): yeah with what "we" did
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:56:25 PM): cock
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:56:51 PM): Either fire me, or get out of my chair.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:57:01 PM): ha
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:57:02 PM): pussy
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:57:07 PM): he's getting out of the chair
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:57:11 PM): what a little girl
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:57:15 PM): ooh speaking of girl
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:57:49 PM): ooh yeah momma
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:58:02 PM): i want her to hurt me
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:58:05 PM): is this normal?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:58:24 PM): Ok that was dippy
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:58:28 PM): please don't let that be the ending
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:58:33 PM): oh yeah of course
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:58:39 PM): the spoiler in teh dvd menu
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:58:42 PM): had kim & jack
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:59:03 PM): yeah sure they let kim just run through their line like that
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:59:08 PM): stupid kim
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (11:59:30 PM): whoa, her eyebrows look fucked UP
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:00:00 AM): JACK BAUER is a big boy.... he can take care of himself
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:00:05 AM): perhaps you should take care of me
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:00:08 AM): naked
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:00:11 AM): PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:00:43 AM): la la la
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:00:46 AM): defeat our enemies
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:00:50 AM): God Bless America
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:00:55 AM): la la la
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:00:57 AM): what a stupid ending
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:01:03 AM): oh is it nosferatu chick?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:01:07 AM): no wait something bad's gonna happen
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:01:12 AM): got that feeling
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:01:14 AM): whoa
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:01:19 AM): hot chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:01:26 AM): do it hot chick!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:01:31 AM): OOH MOMMA
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:01:33 AM): OOH YEAH
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:01:40 AM): SHOOT HIM!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:01:49 AM): OR DID SHE ANTHRAX HIM?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:01:54 AM): or did she anthrax him?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:02:07 AM): ooh momma
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:02:09 AM): nice boobs
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:02:12 AM): ooh yeah nice boobs
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:02:18 AM): wait, was that the chick from the firs tseason?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:02:42 AM): ooh yeah
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:02:44 AM): nice boobs
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:03:04 AM): wow. what a plan
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:03:05 AM): uh oh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:03:15 AM): oops
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:04:03 AM): shouldn't the secret service throw him into a limo and speed him to a hospital or something?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:04:06 AM): 8:00:00
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:04:14 AM): that was somewhat of a shitty ending
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:04:22 AM): i liked the first season's ending better
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:04:30 AM): although this season had boobs running down stairs
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:04:32 AM): yay!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (12:04:39 AM): OK bedtime
JihadJimmyMWCCDF has left the chat room.

SACRIFICE THE MEN IN THE PLANES TO PREVENT THE WAR YOU USELESS TARD

2005-07-10T19:02:00.000-07:00

3am Criticism of 24 Season Two 6am - 7am
You are now in chat room “AIMisGoodNOT.”
TioJaime858 has entered the chat room.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:09:05 PM): hello dere!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:09:30 PM): no sense in stopping now...
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:09:45 PM): and dammit, i'm getting hungry
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:09:49 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON 24
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:09:55 PM): DAVID PALMER
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:09:59 PM): heh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:10:07 PM): TONY ALMEIDA!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:10:11 PM): been reassigned
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:10:20 PM): KIM BAUER!!!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:10:43 PM): jack bauer
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:10:46 PM): JACK BAUER!!!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:11:19 PM): THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 6:00 AM AND 7:00 AM
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:11:32 PM): ooh yeah taking chapelle out of the equation
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:12:45 PM): rogue CTU agents!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:13:27 PM): yeah like JACK BAUER isn't gonna find you and go all JACK BAUER on your ass
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:14:34 PM): oh yeah
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:14:35 PM): sunlight
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:14:39 PM): cool effect
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:14:57 PM): hey that was a good idea
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:15:14 PM): accupuncutre chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:15:18 PM): who's this new chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:15:53 PM): ooh yeah the chick who was supposed to get hewitt
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:16:19 PM): aww yeah
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:16:23 PM): see, you pissed JACK off
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:16:30 PM): and now he's gonna ruin your shit
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:16:34 PM): stupid kid
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:16:41 PM): ha ha dead end
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:16:55 PM): uh oh he's got a gun
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:17:16 PM): stupid kid
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:17:47 PM): LOL
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:17:51 PM): aww
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:17:57 PM): OK he fell like 10 feet
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:18:11 PM): what is he dying?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:18:31 PM): yeah you bitch
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:19:00 PM): nice job pulling a gun on a federal agent
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:19:02 PM): uh oh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:19:05 PM): his head's bleeding?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:19:21 PM): hmm, this could be very bad
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:19:23 PM): 6:09:43
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:19:29 PM): 6:14:08
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:19:38 PM): stupid kid
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:19:46 PM): los angeles got cloudy real fast
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:20:19 PM): "had to take [Chapelle] out of play"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:20:23 PM): B node 1212
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:20:35 PM): ooh yeah ann-chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:20:53 PM): ooh hi ann-chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:20:58 PM): hi ann-nemecunt
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:21:23 PM): i don't like this chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:22:31 PM): some new lawyer dude
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:23:06 PM): good advice
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:23:13 PM): "get him to untie your hands"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:23:26 PM): hey take her out of the equation too
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:23:42 PM): uh oh goons
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:23:44 PM): phone
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:24:52 PM): OK back to the CTU goons
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:25:04 PM): goons who think that there' s a problem
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:25:34 PM): ann-nemecunt!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:25:37 PM): don't like her
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:25:40 PM): don't want to make out w/her
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:26:01 PM): yeah get rid of DAVID PALMER and now you need his help
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:26:55 PM): now the lawyer is playing the history card
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:28:03 PM): yeah kick the door down
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:28:10 PM): oops, it's chapelle
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:28:24 PM): nice job stupid-ass
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:28:30 PM): you shouldn't have pulled the gun on JACK BAUER that's what's happening to you
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:29:04 PM): hmm, if that kid dies, you have just over an episode to fix this shit
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:29:05 PM): uh oh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:29:15 PM): they're calling back, the chopper
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:29:19 PM): oh that's uncool
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:29:28 PM): WTF
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:29:36 PM): bogus
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:29:50 PM): phone
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:30:30 PM): OK one more episode, then dinner, then the finale
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:30:38 PM): shit, chopper is recalled
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:31:04 PM): nice that you don't give a damn about ann-chick not being able to get you a chopper, but she really couldn't 6:23:48
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:31:08 PM): 6:28:13
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:31:37 PM): wait, so did nosferatu chick die?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:31:54 PM): she's been ther efor about half an hour
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:32:13 PM): LOL
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:32:44 PM): like i said before, you fired DAVID PALMER and now you need his help
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:32:54 PM): well, yeah he should help
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:32:57 PM): or maybe not
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:32:58 PM): [phpoe
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:33:01 PM): phon
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:33:02 PM): phone
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:33:52 PM): OK nosferatu chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:34:26 PM): and yeah, you can either save the american bomber pilots
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:34:44 PM): or sacrifice them to prevent the war
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:34:58 PM): or get vampire chick to deliver kingsley
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:35:06 PM): is he having a heart attack or something?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:35:12 PM): whoa
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:35:23 PM): "my heart stopped when kingsley's men were interrogating me"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:35:36 PM): and when people say stuff like "you wouldn't dare hurt me"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:35:42 PM): you're just asking to be hurt
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:35:56 PM): ooh yeah
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:36:06 PM): "hewitt's gonna talk to him"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:36:09 PM): heh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:36:49 PM): wait so peter kingsley is answering to somebody else?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:37:02 PM): LOL
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:37:22 PM): ann-cunt
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:37:38 PM): i don't like that cunt
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:38:20 PM): hewitt was able to recreate people's voices
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:40:21 PM): yeah it's as simple as finding a program on a menu
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:40:23 PM): uh oh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:40:27 PM): they found ann-chick, JACK BAUER
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:40:50 PM): ooh ann-chick in handcuffs
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:40:56 PM): i lke her boobs
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:40:59 PM): 6:37:16
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:41:04 PM): 6:41:41
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:41:31 PM): well that's stupid
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:41:48 PM): sure, sacrifice american bombers to prevent a war
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:41:58 PM): yeah you stupid
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:42:20 PM): SACRIFICE THE MEN IN THE PLANES TO PREVENT THE WAR YOU USELESS TARD
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:42:30 PM): what, kate warner is just now showing up to the matheson's house?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:42:35 PM): uh oh kim's gone
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:42:45 PM): put her back in the bubble bath
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:42:53 PM): oh is kim gonna shoot her?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:43:00 PM): ooh kim has that crazed look in her eyes
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:43:34 PM): uh oh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:43:59 PM): krazy kim!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:44:21 PM): he'd send somebody he'd just met so you could shoot her
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:44:24 PM): makes for good TV
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:44:27 PM): SHOOT HER
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:44:31 PM): SHOOT HER
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:44:39 PM): DAMMIT
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:44:50 PM): KIM IS VERY VULNERABLE RIGHT NOW
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:44:51 PM): sorry
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:44:55 PM): kim is very vulnerable right now
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:45:00 PM): i think she needs to molest me
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:45:20 PM): "hey, we're in Holding 2... we should get all kinds of naked..."
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:46:00 PM): yay for ann-chick!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:46:17 PM): yay for ann-chick molesting me!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:46:33 PM): oh yeah so DAVID PALMER talked to the turk
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:46:56 PM): la la
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:47:31 PM): 6:48:05
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:47:35 PM): 6:52:29
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:47:52 PM): oh. Kim didn't shoot kate warner
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:48:28 PM): ooh yeah elisha cuthbert
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:48:41 PM): YOUR DAD WOULD BE HAPPIER IF YOU FUCKING LISTENED TO HIM EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:49:06 PM): yeah, you both lost your mothers. yay
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:49:10 PM): thanks for making me fall asleep
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:49:48 PM): well isn't it enough to show CTU the devices used to make the recording?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:50:09 PM): what w/the ID of the dead techie... that should be evidence enough
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:51:33 PM): LA coliseum gate 18
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:51:34 PM): boo
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:51:37 PM): fuck the trojans
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:51:51 PM): weekend at hewitt's
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:51:54 PM): ooh nice boobs
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:51:57 PM): HOLY JESUS
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:52:08 PM): ooh boobs
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:52:32 PM): you can take your shirt of
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:52:33 PM): off
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:52:37 PM): oh is he gonna kill her?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:52:41 PM): she's kinda old
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:52:43 PM): but i'm Ok w/that
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:52:46 PM): whore-earrings
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:53:20 PM): OK fell asleep there.... lemme rewind
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:53:35 PM): he's hugging the boobs
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:53:45 PM): and now he has a knife
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:53:46 PM): uh oh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:53:47 PM): poor boobs
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:54:38 PM): OK boobs is dead
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:54:49 PM): there was a montage
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:54:56 PM): and now jack's heart is failing and shit
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:55:10 PM): sweet! LA river!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:55:15 PM): 7:00:00
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:55:25 PM): not much to that episode
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:55:55 PM): if only because there's one more to go w/all the fixins
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:56:24 PM): Heather Salmon as "boobs"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:56:32 PM): stay chuned for scenes from our next episode
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:56:37 PM): dinner time
TioJaime858 has left the chat room.

you should pistol whip the nosferatu chick

2005-07-10T18:06:00.000-07:00

3am Criticism of 24 Season Two 5am - 6am
You are now in chat room “AIMSmellsLikePoop.”
TioJaime858 has entered the chat room.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:13:26 PM): hello dere!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:13:40 PM): gonna see if i can finish off 24 Season Two
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:14:42 PM): lemme check TJA1 to see which hour is next
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:15:58 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON 24
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:16:03 PM): DAVID PALMER
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:16:09 PM): lol they took away the PRESIDENT
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:16:32 PM): TONY ALMEIDA
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:16:46 PM): KIM BAUER!!!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:17:04 PM): heh, she made the SHoP
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:17:06 PM): JACK BAUER
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:17:29 PM): nosferatu chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:17:43 PM): THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 5:00 AM AND 6:00 PM
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:17:45 PM): SHIT
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:17:53 PM): the following takes place between 5am and 6am
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:17:59 PM): pig-effer
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:18:37 PM): ooh yeah attackage
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:19:21 PM): ooh ~~PRESIDENT~~ DAVID PALMER is mad!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:19:36 PM): the ceremonial handing over of the keycodes
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:20:16 PM): hi ann-chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:20:18 PM): ooh yeah
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:21:46 PM): nice job TONY ALMEIDA for standing up to district and thie hill
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:22:29 PM): JACK BAUER, BITCH!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:22:46 PM): ex-secret service
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:22:56 PM): ha ha shouldn't have said "ex"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:23:09 PM): nosferatu-chick!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:24:09 PM): i don't like her
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:24:13 PM): she scares the crap out of me
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:24:25 PM): LOL shoot her!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:24:29 PM): aww, he didn't shoot her
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:25:21 PM): peter kingsley is an oil dude and he wants the US to go to war w/the middle east
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:25:23 PM): yay
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:25:40 PM): shoot the nerd!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:26:05 PM): you should pistol whip the nosferatu chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:26:06 PM): 5:10:20
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:26:14 PM): 5:14:45
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:26:32 PM): pistol whip him!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:26:53 PM): he wants a lawyer
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:26:57 PM): just pistol whip him
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:27:16 PM): if i was a CTU badass, I'd pistol whip civilians to get them to talk
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:27:22 PM): civvies like mrs. palmer
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:28:08 PM): jack should've shot nosferatu chick so this nerd-dude wouldn't be able to talk to her
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:29:00 PM): and now she's trying to strike a deal to save herself
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:29:08 PM): let's follow along shall we?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:29:19 PM): chick was mad at her husband
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:29:24 PM): wanted revenge
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:29:36 PM): kingsley's oil would be tripled by war
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:30:07 PM): only one to corroborate story is sound tech nerd
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:30:46 PM): STFU ~~PRESIDENT~~ DAVID PALMER
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:31:11 PM): and now ~~PRESIDENT~~ DAVID PALMER is playing the jack bauer card
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:31:55 PM): blah blah blah, your best would be to help me
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:31:59 PM): gonna talk to jack bauer
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:33:17 PM): ooh yeah gloves coming off?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:33:56 PM): ha ha ann-nemesis is mad
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:34:33 PM): ann-nemesis going to confirm what ann-chick?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:34:51 PM): ann-neme-cunt
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:34:53 PM): 5:23:24
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:35:02 PM): 5:27:52
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:36:26 PM): nosferatu-chick wheeling and dealing w/the nerd
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:37:24 PM): something is afoot
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:37:39 PM): ooh ann-chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:38:21 PM): TONY ALMEIDA's been reassigned
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:38:25 PM): sending him home right now
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:38:26 PM): whoa
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:38:32 PM): what a dick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:39:13 PM): he he has a titanium
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:39:42 PM): that's great geek
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:40:34 PM): you tards
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:40:49 PM): now would be a good time to shoot mrs. palmer
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:41:09 PM): wow i'd like to make out with her
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:41:12 PM): not sure why
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:42:19 PM): ooh yeah she likes you
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:42:22 PM): should've shot her
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:42:29 PM): 5:34:44
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:42:37 PM): 5:39:11
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:42:48 PM): ooh KIM BAUER back at the house
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:42:57 PM): ooh kim yeah
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:43:07 PM): i would like to make out w/elisha cuthbert
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:43:25 PM): nicehouse
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:43:28 PM): nice house
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:44:00 PM): yeah mr. ~~PRESIDENT~~
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:44:02 PM): ha
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:45:19 PM): whoa falling asleep here
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:45:27 PM): "sherri's here w/me"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:45:29 PM): ooh yeah
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:45:41 PM): taken out of context that sounds kinda hump-licious
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:45:49 PM): don't trust the nosferatu chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:45:51 PM): no shit
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:46:27 PM): she agreed to stay out of the way?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:46:41 PM): i'm gonna have egg on my face if nosferatu chick turns up good
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:47:27 PM): WTF, was that the crazy dude?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:47:49 PM): ooh yeah kim
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:48:02 PM): i forget what this dude's nickname was
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:49:19 PM): oh he called him "Mr. President"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:49:35 PM): hey try asking the new guy for a phone
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:49:39 PM): see how far that gets you
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:49:45 PM): and hwy wouln't the cop come inside?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:49:46 PM): tard
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:49:59 PM): uh oh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:50:02 PM): crazy-dad has a gun
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:50:10 PM): and he has that wild lok in his eyes
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:50:20 PM): and he just took something out from a lamp
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:50:35 PM): oh he has a passport and money and other shit
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:50:38 PM): shoot kim
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:50:41 PM): take her out of the equation
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:50:51 PM): i'd like to molest elisha cuthbert in san jose
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:51:45 PM): are they gonna pistol whip Chapelle from District?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:51:52 PM): uh oh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:51:55 PM): that's not good
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:52:10 PM): heh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:52:14 PM): 5:47:15
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:52:20 PM): 5:51:27
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:54:37 PM): uh oh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:54:42 PM): dude he killed the cop?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:54:44 PM): oh that's not good
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:54:51 PM): oh shit
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:54:54 PM): you kim-tard
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:55:32 PM): Look out, he's nuts!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:55:55 PM): his wife wasn't that good looking
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:55:59 PM): i liked the terrorist chick better
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:56:09 PM): WTF?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:56:11 PM): stupid-kim
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:56:26 PM): hey take his gun
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:56:30 PM): what did she do?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:56:53 PM): rewinding
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:57:09 PM): did she hit him on the head or something?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:57:13 PM): ooh yeah kim
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:58:04 PM): maybe you should get out instead of hanging around a big, mad dude
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:58:09 PM): we know how well you did w/guns
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:58:42 PM): shoot the dad!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:59:02 PM): OH YES
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:59:07 PM): THAT WAS HOT
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:59:41 PM): OH MAN AND THAT WAS HOTTER!!!!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (5:59:54 PM): DUDE I LOVE CHICKS W/GUNS
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:00:15 PM): wow
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:00:19 PM): cool man
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:00:32 PM): ooh yeah vampire chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:00:39 PM): ooh kate warner
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:00:42 PM): WTF?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:00:55 PM): stupid kate warner
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:01:01 PM): ooh yeah go pick up kim
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:01:30 PM): oops
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:01:40 PM): he stabbed mrs. vampire chick
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:01:48 PM): uh oh
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:01:57 PM): 6:00:00
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:02:08 PM): rad-assed episode
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (6:02:33 PM): stay chuned for scenes from our next episode
TioJaime858 has left the chat room.

A or B: Las Vegas or San Diego?

2005-07-06T04:16:00.000-07:00

you still up for it?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:13:16 PM): hey shit i almost forgot to mention
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:13:28 PM): this new job? allows me to go to vegas in the middle of the month
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:13:40 PM): you still up for it?
SixHertz (9:14:01 PM): I'm headed to Philly for 10 days for business. I leave tonight
SixHertz (9:14:13 PM): I wont know my sched until after this training.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:14:42 PM): Ok well at the least have your GF send her friends to vegas
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:14:56 PM): tell them to meet us at the craps table at NY, NY
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:15:03 PM): we'll take care of the rest
SixHertz (9:16:09 PM): haha, I'll let her know

you still up for it?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:13:16 PM): hey shit i almost forgot to mention JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:13:28 PM): this new job? allows me to go to vegas in the middle of the month JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:13:40 PM): you still up for it? SixHertz (9:14:01 PM): I'm headed to Philly for 10 days for business. I leave tonight SixHertz (9:14:13 PM): I wont know my sched until after this training. JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:14:42 PM): Ok well at the least have your GF send her friends to vegas JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:14:56 PM): tell them to meet us at the craps table at NY, NY JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:15:03 PM): we'll take care of the rest SixHertz (9:16:09 PM): haha, I'll let her know

And really, SixH's presence in vegas is surprisingly optional. We can just as easily comemmorate his b-day w/o him.

And why NY, NY you ask? Their complimentary scotch whisky is The Glenlivet. Almost makes up for their shitty sportsbook and racebook.

she has big boobs.
SixHertz (9:18:47 PM): Dude, you wanna come down here for the weekend of the 16th? I get back in Friday the 15th at night. One of shiraz's GF's from Tuscon (single/available, conservative republican, blonde) will be here.
SixHertz (9:19:00 PM): that entire weekend. She turns 26 in October.
SixHertz (9:19:31 PM): Shiraz has been wanting to meet you. We can go to the Casinos here in the SD area.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:19:34 PM): you tard, that's the vegas weekend i just asked you about
SixHertz (9:19:40 PM): I know
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:19:41 PM): whoa, you said the magic words
SixHertz (9:19:42 PM): I can't go
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:19:50 PM): did somebody say casino?
SixHertz (9:19:50 PM): I CAN stick around here.
SixHertz (9:19:55 PM): yup
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:20:01 PM): no sorry dude
SixHertz (9:20:03 PM): Her name is Tiffany. She likes to gamble too
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:20:10 PM): hey, stop it
SixHertz (9:20:15 PM): (am getting this info from Shiraz while we speak)
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:20:17 PM): uncool man
SixHertz (9:20:21 PM): haha
SixHertz (9:20:22 PM): ok
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:20:35 PM): jimmy's looking for one more buzzword
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:20:45 PM): if you can hit it, i'll kiss vegas goodbye
SixHertz (9:20:55 PM): she has big boobs.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:21:06 PM): ohh no thanks for playing
SixHertz (9:21:15 PM): but she does. I saw them.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:21:24 PM): OK yes. i believe you
SixHertz (9:21:34 PM): Buzzword for what?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:21:45 PM): and i also question your wisdom at commenting on your woman's friend's boobs with your woman in close proximity
SixHertz (9:21:56 PM): Dude, she told me to tell you that.

Ahh, see how easily we are distracted? For a few seconds there, I was not thinking about complimentary scotch.

what's the damn buzzword, I'm sure it's involved.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:22:05 PM): well you hit two buzzwords so far: republican, gamble
SixHertz (9:24:18 PM): There will be plenty of drinking/booze/cigar smoking here. She is a beer representative for Coors.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:25:19 PM): cigar... another buzzword, but still not the one i'm looking for
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:25:43 PM): lemme tell you man, san diego is looking almost as nice as vegas right now
SixHertz (9:25:43 PM): what's the damn buzzword, I'm sure it's involved.
SixHertz (9:26:42 PM): You can stay for free at my place. I have a friggin' 52" HDTV. What more do you want?
SixHertz (9:26:53 PM): :D
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:27:21 PM): well thanks for playing, we're up on a break
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:27:27 PM): the secret word was "guns"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:27:34 PM): OK dude, i'm out... gonna go bowling
SixHertz (9:27:36 PM): hahah
SixHertz (9:27:41 PM): fine, dude.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:27:56 PM): lemme think about SD, but chances are i'll be headed to vegas
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:28:02 PM): had my heart set on that for several months now
SixHertz (9:28:08 PM): I understand, dude.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:28:09 PM): w/exception of a slight setback
JihadJimmyMWCCDF (9:28:17 PM): what w/getting shitcanned and all

Vegas, baby, vegas. Please to be joining us for birthday celebrations on the weekend of 15-17 July 2005.

Cordially,
Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

another false alarm

2005-07-05T21:22:00.000-07:00

note the time stamps...

i posted this instead
You are now in chat room “aimblows.”
TioJaime858 has entered the chat room.
TioJaime858 (8:37:57 PM): hello dere
TioJaime858 (8:38:01 PM): gonna watch some more 24
TioJaime858 (8:38:09 PM): while waiting for a friend
TioJaime858 (8:38:13 PM): for bowling
TioJaime858 (8:38:15 PM): maybe zoo
TioJaime858 (8:38:48 PM): so i've set up the chat room, and lemme make two D&M sounds
TioJaime858 (9:17:58 PM): well OK
TioJaime858 (9:18:10 PM): i posted this instead
TioJaime858 (9:18:13 PM): never got the 24 started
TioJaime858 (9:18:25 PM): i'm gonna pull the plug, we'll try this later tonight
TioJaime858 has left the chat room.

i posted this instead
You are now in chat room “aimblows.” TioJaime858 has entered the chat room. TioJaime858 (8:37:57 PM): hello dere TioJaime858 (8:38:01 PM): gonna watch some more 24 TioJaime858 (8:38:09 PM): while waiting for a friend TioJaime858 (8:38:13 PM): for bowling TioJaime858 (8:38:15 PM): maybe zoo TioJaime858 (8:38:48 PM): so i've set up the chat room, and lemme make two D&M sounds TioJaime858 (9:17:58 PM): well OK TioJaime858 (9:18:10 PM): i posted this instead TioJaime858 (9:18:13 PM): never got the 24 started TioJaime858 (9:18:25 PM): i'm gonna pull the plug, we'll try this later tonight TioJaime858 has left the chat room.

enjoying the waning days of jimmy unemployment-palooza 2k5

2005-07-05T14:01:00.000-07:00

Just finished Dan Brown's Angels and Demons on the advice of my neighbor. Picked it up Saturday night in Santa Monica at the B&N on the 3rd street Promenade, and was gonna work out and have lunch this morning when I started reading it on the crapper and couldn't put it down until it was done.

Very well written, very intriguing. Would make a good movie, if that's of any indication of my reviewing skills. About five or six rad-assed plot twists at the very end, and I'm pleased to note that I caught two of them? Very good read.

Note on ambigrams: they're not as uncommon as Brown leads you to believe when he says that computers have been unable to create an Illuminati ambigram. You can make them by hand, as we were screwing around with them in Doc Schleimer's Calc AB class back in high school.

so what else is left for unemployment-palooza? gonna finish watching 24 Season Two (and tune in to TJ:A1 for 3am Criticisms!) and maybe bowling. And that's just today.

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

yeah you fucker because i was trying to change the region code

2005-07-01T19:14:00.000-07:00

Ok. Quote for the post title has nothing to do with 24. But it should illustrate the difference between a 3amC and a regular recap. The focus isn't so much the show, but the jimmy thought process.

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

3am Criticism of 24 Season Two, 4am - 5am
You are now in chat room “bitemeaim.”
TioJaime858 has entered the chat room.
TioJaime858 (6:25:15 PM): hello dere
TioJaime858 (6:25:24 PM): and WTF did AIM miss a line last time?
TioJaime858 (6:25:43 PM): DAMMIT I ALREADY PUT MY DVD AWAY
TioJaime858 (6:25:47 PM): GOTTA TAKE IT OUT AGAIN
TioJaime858 (6:25:54 PM): FUCK EM, THEY OWE ME A RIDE TO THE THEATER TONIGHT
TioJaime858 (6:26:50 PM): you fuckers
TioJaime858 (6:26:57 PM): stupid apple dvd player
TioJaime858 (6:28:33 PM): coulda been halfway through the fucking episode by now if it wasn't for my friends
TioJaime858 (6:28:36 PM): PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER
TioJaime858 (6:28:50 PM): VICE PRESIDENT JIM PRESCOTT!!!
TioJaime858 (6:29:02 PM): KIM BAUER!!!
TioJaime858 (6:29:11 PM): ooh yeah KIM BAUER
TioJaime858 (6:29:16 PM): TONY ALMEIDA
TioJaime858 (6:29:37 PM): JACK BAUER, YOU BITCHES
TioJaime858 (6:29:56 PM): THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 4:00 AM AND 5:00 AM
TioJaime858 (6:30:28 PM): i like how they put the dumb guy in a trucker hat
TioJaime858 (6:31:30 PM): he's going all barefoot john mcclain style
TioJaime858 (6:31:42 PM): yippie-kay-yay motherfuckers
TioJaime858 (6:31:55 PM): bombers awaiting refueling
TioJaime858 (6:32:04 PM): ooh president to the conference room
TioJaime858 (6:32:30 PM): oh you are the president of the united states
TioJaime858 (6:32:46 PM): there's probably only a number of times you can pull that card on somebody on your own staff
TioJaime858 (6:33:04 PM): like, no shit, mr. president you're the POTUS
TioJaime858 (6:33:08 PM): ya fucking think?
TioJaime858 (6:33:14 PM): going to the conference room
TioJaime858 (6:33:15 PM): ooh yeah
TioJaime858 (6:33:40 PM): you were busy jim
TioJaime858 (6:33:53 PM): ooh yeah this is a unique situation
TioJaime858 (6:34:04 PM): kinda like Air Force One being hijacked
TioJaime858 (6:34:11 PM): we are invoking the 25th amendment
TioJaime858 (6:34:36 PM): section 4
TioJaime858 (6:35:02 PM): VP and majority of cabinet determine unable to discharge duties of office la la
TioJaime858 (6:35:15 PM): didn't PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER watch Air Force One?
TioJaime858 (6:35:43 PM): and, VICE PRESIDENT JIM PRESCOTT have you ever watched 24? ever heard of that jack bauer guy?
TioJaime858 (6:35:51 PM): could've watched season 1
TioJaime858 (6:36:12 PM): instead of a shot of the video screen you could've showed the VICE PRESIDENT
TioJaime858 (6:37:12 PM): gonna show a pattern of irrational behavior
TioJaime858 (6:37:14 PM): ooh yeah
TioJaime858 (6:37:26 PM): how is the camera following PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER
TioJaime858 (6:38:15 PM): ooh serious questions raised
TioJaime858 (6:39:05 PM): ooh yeah dueling politicians
TioJaime858 (6:39:12 PM): yeah i wonder who's gonna win
TioJaime858 (6:39:24 PM): yeah, probably not the best thing to say
TioJaime858 (6:39:26 PM): 4:11:13
TioJaime858 (6:39:37 PM): 4:15:42
TioJaime858 (6:40:58 PM): oh lucky for JACK BAUER he has an adapter
TioJaime858 (6:41:09 PM): heh, ran into some interference
TioJaime858 (6:41:15 PM): ooh hi ann-chick
TioJaime858 (6:41:32 PM): run a background check on Peter Kingsley
TioJaime858 (6:42:00 PM): ooh yeah michelle are you ready for me
TioJaime858 (6:42:04 PM): that sounds hot
TioJaime858 (6:42:15 PM): LOL it's the reporter
TioJaime858 (6:43:00 PM): ooh hustled into a room
TioJaime858 (6:43:08 PM): oh eff the first amendment
TioJaime858 (6:43:59 PM): well, the bill of rights is probably more important than lives
TioJaime858 (6:44:07 PM): oh well, maybe not
TioJaime858 (6:44:10 PM): eh who gives a fuck
TioJaime858 (6:44:19 PM): la la la, legal precedent
TioJaime858 (6:44:23 PM): ooh yeah testification
TioJaime858 (6:44:42 PM): ooh yeah ann-chick
TioJaime858 (6:44:55 PM): chip is damaged
TioJaime858 (6:45:25 PM): KIM BAUER!!!
TioJaime858 (6:45:41 PM): what? he'/s gonna let kim through?
TioJaime858 (6:46:00 PM): KIM BAUER!!!
TioJaime858 (6:46:09 PM): yay!
TioJaime858 (6:46:18 PM): yay back to the matheson's house
TioJaime858 (6:46:35 PM): OK enough of the social bullshit, grab a cot!
TioJaime858 (6:46:56 PM): ooh elisha cuthbert mmm
TioJaime858 (6:48:32 PM): yes we get it YOU'RE THE FUCKING PRESIDENT
TioJaime858 (6:48:42 PM): you don't call me by my first name!
TioJaime858 (6:48:44 PM): 4:24:49
TioJaime858 (6:48:54 PM): 4:29:15
TioJaime858 (6:49:08 PM): ooh yeah
TioJaime858 (6:49:12 PM): who's this man
TioJaime858 (6:49:16 PM): heh roger stanton
TioJaime858 (6:49:40 PM): the dude who was tortured
TioJaime858 (6:49:41 PM): heh
TioJaime858 (6:49:43 PM): funny shit
TioJaime858 (6:50:15 PM): arrived at the OC, had raeburn dismissed
TioJaime858 (6:50:27 PM): well, yes it was true
TioJaime858 (6:51:02 PM): i thought he did know more about the bomb
TioJaime858 (6:51:48 PM): ooh yeah jack sent the data
TioJaime858 (6:52:03 PM): ooh should take about 15 mins, ann-chick said
TioJaime858 (6:52:16 PM): zap-suppers!
TioJaime858 (6:52:24 PM): zap!
TioJaime858 (6:52:27 PM): zap-zap!
TioJaime858 (6:52:29 PM): heh
TioJaime858 (6:52:53 PM): "we knew about the bomb weeks ago"
TioJaime858 (6:53:44 PM): oops
TioJaime858 (6:53:48 PM): no rest of the tape
TioJaime858 (6:54:13 PM): well then how the hell did they find the bomb at norton airfield?
TioJaime858 (6:54:47 PM): oops
TioJaime858 (6:55:42 PM): yeah you know, i'm sold, i'd have to side w/PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER
TioJaime858 (6:56:17 PM): ooh yeah analyze the evidence momma
TioJaime858 (6:56:27 PM): perhaps some nude interludes w/ann-chick
TioJaime858 (6:56:37 PM): oops audio files gone
TioJaime858 (6:57:09 PM): LOL
TioJaime858 (6:57:12 PM): 4:37:33
TioJaime858 (6:57:13 PM): oops
TioJaime858 (6:57:14 PM): 32
TioJaime858 (6:57:17 PM): 4:37:32
TioJaime858 (6:57:21 PM): 4:42:00
TioJaime858 (6:57:33 PM): ooh yeah jack has shoes
TioJaime858 (6:57:42 PM): kate warner!!!
TioJaime858 (6:58:01 PM): eh, it's not really your fault
TioJaime858 (6:58:15 PM): well, whatever
TioJaime858 (6:59:13 PM): hey waste precious time w/some smoochy-smoochy
TioJaime858 (6:59:51 PM): hax0r named alex hewitt!
TioJaime858 (7:00:06 PM): the programmer who maybe made the recording
TioJaime858 (7:00:11 PM): also in NORTH HOLLYWOOD!!!
TioJaime858 (7:00:20 PM): ooh take her w/you or something
TioJaime858 (7:00:28 PM): heh, her father is still @ CTU
TioJaime858 (7:01:38 PM): well, things change because the show is called 24, VICE PRESIDENT JIM PRESCOTT
TioJaime858 (7:03:39 PM): novick is pushing for the attack again
TioJaime858 (7:03:59 PM): that's kinda retarded.... wouldn't you want to make sure first?
TioJaime858 (7:04:29 PM): secretary of transportaion yes
TioJaime858 (7:04:35 PM): secretary of treasure no
TioJaime858 (7:04:39 PM): 4:49:18
TioJaime858 (7:04:47 PM): 4:53:43
TioJaime858 (7:05:09 PM): a caltech nerd
TioJaime858 (7:05:19 PM): and now he went crazy
TioJaime858 (7:05:20 PM): phone
TioJaime858 (7:10:13 PM): ooh T is coming over and we're gonna hve ice cream
TioJaime858 (7:10:24 PM): secretary of defense yes
TioJaime858 (7:10:30 PM): and my DVD player is being shitty again
TioJaime858 (7:10:32 PM): stupid apple
TioJaime858 (7:10:46 PM): yeah you fucker because i was trying to change the region code
TioJaime858 (7:10:48 PM): bitch
TioJaime858 (7:11:13 PM): i swear apple's dvd player is so buggy
TioJaime858 (7:11:46 PM): ANGER
TioJaime858 (7:12:05 PM): FUCK YOU APPLE DVD PLAYER
TioJaime858 (7:12:12 PM): WHY ARE YOU AN UNBEARABLE PIECE OF SHIT?
TioJaime858 (7:12:37 PM): STUPID ASSHOLE
TioJaime858 (7:13:34 PM): OK gonna save this 3amC because my entire computer is taking a shit right now
TioJaime858 (7:13:37 PM): hopefullyi didn't lose it
TioJaime858 (7:14:29 PM): wow, wonderful work apple
TioJaime858 (7:14:55 PM): because really, who would want to do something like pause a DVD?
TioJaime858 (7:15:27 PM): Scene selection
TioJaime858 (7:15:41 PM): The Deciding Vote
TioJaime858 (7:15:46 PM): Secretary of Defense Yes
TioJaime858 (7:16:03 PM): Secretary of Agriculture...
TioJaime858 (7:16:06 PM): ... no
TioJaime858 (7:16:14 PM): 7 - 6
TioJaime858 (7:16:20 PM): Secretary of Interior...
TioJaime858 (7:16:25 PM): No
TioJaime858 (7:16:29 PM): 7-all!
TioJaime858 (7:16:42 PM): Seretary of State... deciding vote!
TioJaime858 (7:16:57 PM): yeah just vote already you pigfucker
TioJaime858 (7:17:27 PM): hmm, what part of we might not need to go to war don't you pigfuckers understand?
TioJaime858 (7:17:40 PM): lucky for us little brains in the audience, we know that JACK BAUER will prevail
TioJaime858 (7:18:28 PM): whoa, they're taking ~~PRESIDENT~~ DAVID PALMER AWAY
TioJaime858 (7:19:29 PM): the ~~president~~ should try to over power the marines
TioJaime858 (7:19:52 PM): well, PLACE BETS NOW
TioJaime858 (7:19:55 PM): is the programmer dead?
TioJaime858 (7:19:59 PM): or a chick?
TioJaime858 (7:20:04 PM): uh oh
TioJaime858 (7:20:15 PM): probably not a chick
TioJaime858 (7:20:31 PM): ~~VICE~~ PRESIDENT JIM PRESCOTT BEING SWORN IN
TioJaime858 (7:20:44 PM): yeah nice job w/the spoiler there you pigfuckers
TioJaime858 (7:20:46 PM): KIM BAUER
TioJaime858 (7:21:03 PM): maybe DAVID PALMER should pullan ensign ro and set shit on fire
TioJaime858 (7:21:14 PM): uh oh, bad shit coming up to the loft
TioJaime858 (7:21:23 PM): JACK BAUER HIDING
TioJaime858 (7:21:27 PM): a glock!
TioJaime858 (7:21:46 PM): that was a long 2 minutes
TioJaime858 (7:21:49 PM): 5:00:00
TioJaime858 (7:21:59 PM): whoa NOSFERATU CHICK!!!
TioJaime858 has left the chat room.

false alarm

2005-07-01T18:15:00.000-07:00

you fucking people are driving me crazy. now i have to open up a whole new goddam window because it turns out i have time now to watch more 24.

3am Criticism of 24 Season Two, 4am - 5am
You are now in chat room “aimsucksmybutt.”
TioJaime858 (5:54:03 PM): hello dere
TioJaime858 (5:57:36 PM): OK last disc of Season Two!
TioJaime858 (5:57:39 PM): 4am - 5am!
TioJaime858 (5:57:41 PM): 24!
TioJaime858 (5:57:58 PM): on the title is the First Nosferatu!
TioJaime858 (5:58:17 PM): OK the spoiler was teh VP swearing in?
TioJaime858 (5:58:20 PM): thanks you assholes
TioJaime858 (5:58:24 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON 24
TioJaime858 (5:58:31 PM): PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER!!!
TioJaime858 (5:58:49 PM): VICE PRESIDENT JIM PRESCOTT!!!
TioJaime858 (5:59:02 PM): KIM BAUER!!!!
TioJaime858 (5:59:06 PM): OOH YEAH MOMMA
TioJaime858 (5:59:09 PM): i mean ooh yeah momma
TioJaime858 (5:59:13 PM): TONY ALMEIDA!!!
TioJaime858 (5:59:36 PM): JACK MOTHERFUCKING BAUER, BITCHES
TioJaime858 (5:59:38 PM): OH THAT'S RIGHT
TioJaime858 (5:59:54 PM): THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 4:00 AM AND 5:00 AM
TioJaime858 (6:00:03 PM): which one was sarah wynter?
TioJaime858 (6:01:25 PM): yeah fuck you retards
TioJaime858 (6:01:31 PM): oh it's chip time
TioJaime858 (6:01:44 PM): pentagon briefing that the bombers aren't going to their bases.
TioJaime858 (6:01:46 PM): who's calling?
TioJaime858 (6:02:32 PM): dammit, it's marla
TioJaime858 (6:02:38 PM):

TioJaime858 (6:10:30 PM): OK pulling the plug because my wonderful friends are shooting for the 7:20 bewitched
TioJaime858 (6:10:37 PM): nicole kidman is hot
TioJaime858 has left the chat room.

JACK BAUER TIME MOTHERFUCKERS!

2005-07-01T17:35:00.000-07:00

3am Criticism of 24 Season Two, 3am - 4am
You are now in chat room “GayIM.”
TioJaime858 has entered the chat room.
TioJaime858 (4:47:26 PM): hello dere!
TioJaime858 (4:47:38 PM): another episode for ye
TioJaime858 (4:47:43 PM): to finish off this DVD
TioJaime858 (4:47:46 PM): this disc
TioJaime858 (4:48:17 PM): here we go
TioJaime858 (4:48:25 PM): and the spoiler was some chick on the ground
TioJaime858 (4:48:29 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON 24
TioJaime858 (4:48:34 PM): PRESIDENT JACK BAUER
TioJaime858 (4:48:39 PM): fuck
TioJaime858 (4:48:44 PM): PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER
TioJaime858 (4:48:56 PM): MIKE NOVICK
TioJaime858 (4:49:03 PM): always thought it was Novak
TioJaime858 (4:49:13 PM): KATE WARNER!!!
TioJaime858 (4:49:28 PM): JACK BAUER!!!
TioJaime858 (4:50:02 PM): THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 3:00 AM AND 4:00 AM
TioJaime858 (4:50:19 PM): it's pronounced nucular
TioJaime858 (4:50:31 PM): oops
TioJaime858 (4:50:35 PM): patient was shot
TioJaime858 (4:50:49 PM): you probably don't want to go around shooting people and shit
TioJaime858 (4:50:53 PM): just an idea
TioJaime858 (4:50:56 PM): just a suggestion
TioJaime858 (4:51:23 PM): heh stark pushed BAUER a little too far
TioJaime858 (4:51:28 PM): oops
TioJaime858 (4:51:46 PM): i bet that doctor's pissed
TioJaime858 (4:51:57 PM): crazy crazy North Hollywood
TioJaime858 (4:51:58 PM): go huskies
TioJaime858 (4:52:53 PM): hmm, all ammonia and no nina myers makes jack a dead CTU Agent
TioJaime858 (4:53:01 PM): nice job torture-tard
TioJaime858 (4:53:12 PM): LOL
TioJaime858 (4:54:08 PM): yeah no shit it's critical that the president doesn't find out his Cabinet is being aligned against him
TioJaime858 (4:55:18 PM): PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER
TioJaime858 (4:56:40 PM): ooh ensign ro getting mad
TioJaime858 (4:56:57 PM): ooh yeah ensign ro w/tools
TioJaime858 (4:56:58 PM): and shit
TioJaime858 (4:57:03 PM): ooh yeah
TioJaime858 (4:57:29 PM): ooh oops they took the chip
TioJaime858 (4:58:19 PM): crazy mob mentality
TioJaime858 (4:58:44 PM): heh
TioJaime858 (4:58:45 PM): psyche
TioJaime858 (4:58:53 PM): didn't shoot the foreigner
TioJaime858 (4:59:08 PM): hate crime licious!
TioJaime858 (4:59:46 PM): how convenient a pay phone booth within crawling distance
TioJaime858 (4:59:49 PM): oops
TioJaime858 (4:59:51 PM): 911 is busy
TioJaime858 (4:59:54 PM): poor fucker
TioJaime858 (5:00:32 PM): the doctor's gonna die
TioJaime858 (5:00:35 PM): poor fucker
TioJaime858 (5:01:40 PM): good point he's gonna kill you anyway
TioJaime858 (5:02:01 PM): and really, shouldn't one of the dudes be watching at all times?
TioJaime858 (5:02:11 PM): nice job dumb-terrorist wanna be
TioJaime858 (5:02:18 PM): 3:14:03
TioJaime858 (5:02:25 PM): 3:18:27
TioJaime858 (5:02:33 PM): ooh yeah ann-chick
TioJaime858 (5:02:41 PM): and it's Chapelle from Division
TioJaime858 (5:04:08 PM): "what i want is to do what's right"
TioJaime858 (5:04:13 PM): good call TONY ALMEIDA
TioJaime858 (5:04:35 PM): nice job ensign ro
TioJaime858 (5:04:42 PM): LOL
TioJaime858 (5:04:47 PM): like nobody saw that coming
TioJaime858 (5:04:56 PM): run ensign
TioJaime858 (5:05:11 PM): boingy boingy
TioJaime858 (5:05:19 PM): uh oh
TioJaime858 (5:05:24 PM): ahh
TioJaime858 (5:05:42 PM): wow, i was totally surprised by that
TioJaime858 (5:05:50 PM): i forgot about the chick at the bottom of the stairwell
TioJaime858 (5:07:24 PM): you stupid fuck of a president
TioJaime858 (5:07:43 PM): you're asking your secret service agent and getting mad when he can't answer your dumbfuck questions?
TioJaime858 (5:07:47 PM): tard
TioJaime858 (5:08:24 PM): white dudes worrying about a military response
TioJaime858 (5:08:30 PM): is one of these bob warner?
TioJaime858 (5:10:08 PM): ooh yeah
TioJaime858 (5:10:12 PM): nice job brave doctor dude
TioJaime858 (5:10:21 PM): ha ha
TioJaime858 (5:10:28 PM): ha ha
TioJaime858 (5:10:31 PM): LOL
TioJaime858 (5:11:18 PM): ooh yeah jack's back
TioJaime858 (5:11:23 PM): "peter kingsley"
TioJaime858 (5:11:35 PM): nice job not dying
TioJaime858 (5:11:37 PM): 3:27:38
TioJaime858 (5:11:42 PM): 3:32:02
TioJaime858 (5:11:48 PM): nice job not dying, you wacky doctor dude
TioJaime858 (5:12:00 PM): mike novick!
TioJaime858 (5:12:05 PM): MIKE NOVICK!!!
TioJaime858 (5:13:25 PM): uh oh he wants lynn to go over the shit now
TioJaime858 (5:13:26 PM): heh
TioJaime858 (5:14:30 PM): la la
TioJaime858 (5:14:41 PM): aww yeah jack dude
TioJaime858 (5:15:04 PM): yeah aren't you like an hour late to meet them?
TioJaime858 (5:15:17 PM): lazy-ass
TioJaime858 (5:15:21 PM): busy gettnig tortured and shit
TioJaime858 (5:15:48 PM): la la Chapelle la la
TioJaime858 (5:17:16 PM): if that was me being questioned by the president, i'd do some doo dee doo motions and roll my eyes and shit like that
TioJaime858 (5:17:22 PM): 3:37:38
TioJaime858 (5:17:25 PM): 3:42:03
TioJaime858 (5:17:34 PM): ann-cunt
TioJaime858 (5:17:39 PM): i don't like that cunt
TioJaime858 (5:17:57 PM): somewhere between encino and studio city
TioJaime858 (5:18:25 PM): la la
TioJaime858 (5:18:43 PM): did jack just take a car randomly?
TioJaime858 (5:19:23 PM): yo whattup foreigner dude!
TioJaime858 (5:19:41 PM): Usef you crazy muslim!
TioJaime858 (5:19:47 PM): Don't you go dyin' on me!
TioJaime858 (5:19:50 PM): oops
TioJaime858 (5:20:53 PM): maybe you should've told them about the spare key first
TioJaime858 (5:21:27 PM): is that the mexidude from Training Day
TioJaime858 (5:21:37 PM): neurological damage ooh yeah ensign ro
TioJaime858 (5:22:44 PM): heh, bogus
TioJaime858 (5:22:51 PM): crazy mike!
TioJaime858 (5:23:01 PM): 3:47:36
TioJaime858 (5:23:08 PM): 3:52:03
TioJaime858 (5:23:28 PM): ann-nemecunt
TioJaime858 (5:23:41 PM): STFU you cunt
TioJaime858 (5:23:50 PM): C.U.N.T.
TioJaime858 (5:24:26 PM): wow, what a cunt
TioJaime858 (5:24:29 PM): Whore City
TioJaime858 (5:25:36 PM): ooh yeah director of CTU
TioJaime858 (5:25:47 PM): nice job TONY ALMEIDA
TioJaime858 (5:27:09 PM): LOL
TioJaime858 (5:27:14 PM): oops
TioJaime858 (5:27:29 PM): uh oh
TioJaime858 (5:27:40 PM): Ok and now they're tryingt okill her in her own house
TioJaime858 (5:27:54 PM): yeah JACK BAUER
TioJaime858 (5:28:14 PM): OOH YEAH IT'S JACK TIME MOTHERFUCKERS
TioJaime858 (5:28:17 PM): GET SOME
TioJaime858 (5:28:40 PM): WTF?
TioJaime858 (5:28:42 PM): stupid dvd
TioJaime858 (5:29:27 PM): yeah my dvd gets jumpy right at the climax
TioJaime858 (5:30:03 PM): la la gimme a minute
TioJaime858 (5:30:11 PM): see, do you get this in a shitty recap?
TioJaime858 (5:30:16 PM): no
TioJaime858 (5:31:06 PM): la la Scene Selection
TioJaime858 (5:31:28 PM): The Standoff!
TioJaime858 (5:31:49 PM): fast forwarding
TioJaime858 (5:31:56 PM): chasing kate through teh house
TioJaime858 (5:32:05 PM): gonna shoot her but oops
TioJaime858 (5:32:09 PM): JACK BAUER TIME MOTHERFUCKERS!
TioJaime858 (5:32:11 PM): GET SOME
TioJaime858 (5:32:20 PM): YOU'RE GONNA DIE CLOWNS!
TioJaime858 (5:32:32 PM): OH YOU'VE FUCKED W/THE WRONG CTU AGENT
TioJaime858 (5:33:05 PM): oh just shoot their shit up
TioJaime858 (5:33:20 PM): great the chip is in the hands of retards
TioJaime858 (5:33:25 PM): oh they'll be fine
TioJaime858 (5:34:18 PM): ooh treason-licious
TioJaime858 (5:34:46 PM): vice president: PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER is unfit to remain president
TioJaime858 (5:34:48 PM): 4:00:00
TioJaime858 (5:34:54 PM): good episode!
TioJaime858 (5:35:04 PM): still no KIM BAUER =(
TioJaime858 (5:35:10 PM): time for one more?
TioJaime858 has left the chat room.

yeah no shit when jack gets here you wanna know if it's real

2005-07-01T16:40:00.000-07:00

whoa this episode was 100% KIM BAUER free!!! but they made up for the defficiency w/the ann-chick.

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

3am Criticism of 24 season 2, 2am-3am
You are now in chat room “aimsucksbutt.”
TioJaime858 has entered the chat room.
TioJaime858 (3:47:38 PM): hello dere!
TioJaime858 (3:47:48 PM): having a late lunch, gonna watch 2am-3am
TioJaime858 (3:48:33 PM): and for the third time, the spoiler where jack's captured
TioJaime858 (3:48:46 PM): gonna be eating lunch during this episode, so this may be a bit sparse
TioJaime858 (3:48:50 PM): here we go
TioJaime858 (3:49:09 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON 24
TioJaime858 (3:49:14 PM): TONY ALMEIDA!!!
TioJaime858 (3:49:16 PM): ann-chick!
TioJaime858 (3:49:31 PM): JACK BAUER???
TioJaime858 (3:49:35 PM): i missed it
TioJaime858 (3:49:43 PM): oh no there it was
TioJaime858 (3:49:46 PM): JACK BAUER
TioJaime858 (3:49:54 PM): oh good thing i didn't see this part accidentally
TioJaime858 (3:50:15 PM): PREISDENT DAVID PALMER
TioJaime858 (3:50:44 PM): THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 2:00 AM AND 3:00 AM
TioJaime858 (3:52:32 PM): 20,000 is a huge increase in casualties
TioJaime858 (3:52:36 PM): stupid hollywood
TioJaime858 (3:52:57 PM): tony it's jack!@
TioJaime858 (3:52:59 PM): sorry
TioJaime858 (3:53:04 PM): TONY it's JACK
TioJaime858 (3:53:29 PM): NORTH HOLLYWOOD!!!
TioJaime858 (3:53:50 PM): yeah tony
TioJaime858 (3:53:54 PM): take orders from jack and shit
TioJaime858 (3:53:59 PM): uh oh
TioJaime858 (3:54:03 PM): it's a transponder
TioJaime858 (3:54:28 PM): and how do you know if you can disconnect a transponder like that?
TioJaime858 (3:54:29 PM): wtf man
TioJaime858 (3:55:10 PM): funny how tony lets these things go
TioJaime858 (3:55:13 PM): "who was that?"
TioJaime858 (3:55:15 PM): "no one"
TioJaime858 (3:55:31 PM): and KIM BAUER from last episode
TioJaime858 (3:55:42 PM): some Head of CTU he turned out to be
TioJaime858 (3:56:42 PM): yeah good idea
TioJaime858 (3:56:45 PM): trust the foreigner
TioJaime858 (3:57:59 PM): yeah good spy work there
TioJaime858 (3:58:05 PM): 2:09:08
TioJaime858 (3:58:11 PM): 2:13:20
TioJaime858 (4:00:34 PM): and now the president's calling off the attack
TioJaime858 (4:01:12 PM): dude, isn't there plenty of time to call off an attack?
TioJaime858 (4:01:59 PM): ensign ro
TioJaime858 (4:02:05 PM): needs a spanking and a molestation
TioJaime858 (4:02:14 PM): aren't the planes 3 hours away?
TioJaime858 (4:03:05 PM): yeah no shit when jack gets here you wanna know if it's real
TioJaime858 (4:03:09 PM): WTF kinda order is that?
TioJaime858 (4:03:18 PM): TONY ALMEIDA sucks as CTU-head
TioJaime858 (4:03:53 PM): now what did i say about the foreigner?
TioJaime858 (4:03:55 PM): he's gonna kill her
TioJaime858 (4:04:01 PM): and take the chip
TioJaime858 (4:04:07 PM): Ok maybe not
TioJaime858 (4:04:15 PM): but you can't trust foreigners anyway
TioJaime858 (4:05:09 PM): oops
TioJaime858 (4:05:17 PM): he took the tracker off the chip
TioJaime858 (4:05:20 PM): oh shit
TioJaime858 (4:05:29 PM): oopsthey just tazed him
TioJaime858 (4:05:33 PM): tard
TioJaime858 (4:05:38 PM): what kind of secret agant was that?
TioJaime858 (4:05:45 PM): 2:21:05
TioJaime858 (4:05:51 PM): 2:25:17
TioJaime858 (4:06:38 PM): VP wants cabinet members present
TioJaime858 (4:06:44 PM): are they going Air Force One on us?
TioJaime858 (4:07:12 PM): JACK BAUER puking
TioJaime858 (4:07:22 PM): hmm
TioJaime858 (4:07:33 PM): looks like they're going to commit atrocities on him
TioJaime858 (4:08:11 PM): OK crazy white dudes making jack puke and now they wanna talk to him
TioJaime858 (4:08:49 PM): yeah the chip isn't for sale la la la
TioJaime858 (4:09:54 PM): torture-suppers!
TioJaime858 (4:10:17 PM): i didn't see what the liquid was
TioJaime858 (4:10:21 PM): but it looks bad
TioJaime858 (4:10:46 PM): yeah that was bad
TioJaime858 (4:11:30 PM): it was ammonia
TioJaime858 (4:11:36 PM): is this bad?
TioJaime858 (4:12:04 PM): ann-chick, looking lonely
TioJaime858 (4:12:16 PM): ann-nemesis looking shitty
TioJaime858 (4:12:48 PM): cunt
TioJaime858 (4:13:26 PM): ooh yeah bad blood
TioJaime858 (4:13:33 PM): let's take some time off of fighting terrorists
TioJaime858 (4:13:38 PM): and let's talk about our feelings
TioJaime858 (4:13:50 PM): ann-chick's brother
TioJaime858 (4:13:58 PM): what a stupid story
TioJaime858 (4:14:09 PM): ann-chick's brother almost killed himself over ann-nemesis
TioJaime858 (4:14:41 PM): and ann-chick's brother is here!
TioJaime858 (4:14:42 PM): yay!
TioJaime858 (4:15:06 PM): nice job w/CTU there tony
TioJaime858 (4:15:40 PM): ooh yean ann-chick
TioJaime858 (4:15:50 PM): and crazy ann-brother
TioJaime858 (4:16:23 PM): OK she's earned the name ann-cunt
TioJaime858 (4:16:39 PM): 2:33:59
TioJaime858 (4:16:45 PM): 2:38:11
TioJaime858 (4:17:01 PM): yeah like that ann-cunt's been standing there for 4 minutes
TioJaime858 (4:17:03 PM): in real time
TioJaime858 (4:18:08 PM): now i really don't like ann-cunt
TioJaime858 (4:18:13 PM): ooh ann-chick is crying
TioJaime858 (4:18:18 PM): i too am feeling vulnerable
TioJaime858 (4:18:35 PM): that was convenient
TioJaime858 (4:18:47 PM): how tony asked about ann-brother right before
TioJaime858 (4:18:55 PM): oohyeah ann-chick boobs
TioJaime858 (4:19:48 PM): perhaps you need to stop crying and engage in some Active Love
TioJaime858 (4:20:04 PM): ooh yeah CTU-horniness
TioJaime858 (4:20:09 PM): ooh yeah
TioJaime858 (4:20:14 PM): i wanna make out w/ann-chick
TioJaime858 (4:20:19 PM): and who's watching them?
TioJaime858 (4:20:21 PM): LOL
TioJaime858 (4:20:34 PM): well duh, obviously that was gonna happen
TioJaime858 (4:20:41 PM): what a waste of 10 minutes
TioJaime858 (4:21:52 PM): OK that's not cool
TioJaime858 (4:22:01 PM): he's gonna take a soldering iron to JACK BAUER
TioJaime858 (4:22:08 PM): uncool
TioJaime858 (4:22:15 PM): that's bogus
TioJaime858 (4:22:54 PM): Saved by the Bell
TioJaime858 (4:23:06 PM): not that phones ring with bells anymore
TioJaime858 (4:24:05 PM): Section 4 of the 25th amendment
TioJaime858 (4:24:18 PM): president can be removed w/majority approval of the cabinet
TioJaime858 (4:25:08 PM): ooh yeah
TioJaime858 (4:25:14 PM): they're gonna take ensign ro out of the equation
TioJaime858 (4:26:19 PM): blah blah blah
TioJaime858 (4:26:25 PM): 2:49:04
TioJaime858 (4:26:35 PM): 2:53:17
TioJaime858 (4:26:57 PM): la la hate crimes la la
TioJaime858 (4:27:08 PM): well it's fitting
TioJaime858 (4:27:16 PM): umm, yeah didn't he say fifteen minutes?
TioJaime858 (4:27:33 PM): whoops almost got your shit taken out of the equation
TioJaime858 (4:27:58 PM): oh just shoot both of them
TioJaime858 (4:28:06 PM): and see? isn't it good that we have guns and shit?
TioJaime858 (4:28:12 PM): oops
TioJaime858 (4:28:19 PM): that's not good
TioJaime858 (4:28:26 PM): OK slap the terrorist-sister
TioJaime858 (4:28:32 PM): should've just shot them
TioJaime858 (4:31:24 PM): hold on phone
TioJaime858 (4:35:17 PM): that was marla
TioJaime858 (4:35:29 PM): back to 24
TioJaime858 (4:35:40 PM): division dude Chapelle is coming to CTU
TioJaime858 (4:35:53 PM): and now TONY ALMEIDA wants ann-chick to come up to make out some more?
TioJaime858 (4:35:59 PM): oh no i guess not
TioJaime858 (4:36:22 PM): oohyeah you're not sorry you naughty baby
TioJaime858 (4:36:32 PM): WTF why waste time like this?
TioJaime858 (4:36:58 PM):
TioJaime858 (4:37:39 PM): oohyeah playing the Kim Card
TioJaime858 (4:38:00 PM): and ironally enough that's not synonymous w/the Tard Card
TioJaime858 (4:38:58 PM): oops jack's not responding
TioJaime858 (4:39:07 PM): and the foreigner is getting the crap kicked out of him
TioJaime858 (4:39:24 PM): see what happens when you don't listen to jack? you dawdle and now you're being hate crimed
TioJaime858 (4:39:47 PM): 3:00:00
TioJaime858 (4:40:11 PM): Ok episode except for TONY ALMEIDA and ann-chick and ann-brother and all that useless shit
TioJaime858 has left the chat room.

naomi called

2005-07-01T14:54:00.000-07:00

you like the iChat format? although it's not w/balloons like i like, it's getting closer...

2:45 PM
naomi called
oh
she's on the DL retroactive to a week ago with appendicitis
and and
sorry
oh that sucks
on the 30-day DL
that really sucks
yeah

funny how civilians w/handguns were able to take out commandos in elevated, protected positions with assault rifles

2005-07-01T02:43:00.000-07:00

Was gonna call this post "frottage-city!" but went with the assault rifle one instead...

Jihad Jimmy, Mininster of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

3am Criticism of 24 season 2, 1am to 2am
You are now in chat room “aimblows.”
TioJaime858 has entered the chat room.
TioJaime858 (1:48:07 AM): hello dere
TioJaime858 (1:48:42 AM): OKsound turned off on iChat
TioJaime858 (1:49:19 AM): according to the Blogspot Province, we're due for 2am - 3am
TioJaime858 (1:49:46 AM): and if i was feelign cooler, i'd time the episode so it actually goes from 2-3am CA time
TioJaime858 (1:49:52 AM): but that's too much work
TioJaime858 (1:49:56 AM): so use your fucking imagination
TioJaime858 (1:50:16 AM): and nice job w/teh spoiler, DVD
TioJaime858 (1:50:23 AM): it's jack shirtless and gagged
TioJaime858 (1:50:25 AM): thanks
TioJaime858 (1:50:37 AM): here we go!
TioJaime858 (1:50:44 AM): PREVIOUSLY ON 24
TioJaime858 (1:50:49 AM): TONY ALMEIDA!!!
TioJaime858 (1:50:54 AM): ann-chick!
TioJaime858 (1:51:13 AM): OOPS
TioJaime858 (1:51:16 AM): did i miss something?
TioJaime858 (1:51:58 AM): oops i did it again
TioJaime858 (1:52:09 AM): we're due for 1am - 2am
TioJaime858 (1:52:34 AM): OK here we go!
TioJaime858 (1:52:37 AM): (again!)
TioJaime858 (1:52:41 AM): PREVIOUSLY ON 24
TioJaime858 (1:52:51 AM): PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER!
TioJaime858 (1:53:09 AM): KIM BAUER!!!
TioJaime858 (1:53:13 AM): and her mexidude friend
TioJaime858 (1:53:20 AM): TONY ALMEIDA!!!
TioJaime858 (1:53:24 AM): ann-chick!
TioJaime858 (1:53:31 AM): JACK BAUER!!!
TioJaime858 (1:54:01 AM): Ok dudes shooting at jack and the commando
TioJaime858 (1:54:11 AM): THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 1:00 AM AND 2:00 AM
TioJaime858 (1:54:27 AM): shooting and shit
TioJaime858 (1:54:32 AM): they got one
TioJaime858 (1:54:57 AM): got kate out of the trunk
TioJaime858 (1:55:33 AM): funny how civilians w/handguns were able to take out commandos in elevated, protected positions with assault rifles
TioJaime858 (1:55:51 AM): it was a follow-up team of commandos
TioJaime858 (1:55:59 AM): oh they're using nextels!
TioJaime858 (1:56:24 AM): commando dude is going nuts
TioJaime858 (1:57:15 AM): oh yeah jack using the ann-chick for backup
TioJaime858 (1:57:22 AM): she needs a spanking or a crotch-molesting
TioJaime858 (1:57:49 AM): she's gonna see what she can do
TioJaime858 (1:57:59 AM): yeah make the foreigner wait a few minutes for satellite
TioJaime858 (1:58:08 AM): ooh hi dumbkim
TioJaime858 (1:58:47 AM): the gun was mine!
TioJaime858 (1:58:52 AM): my name is KIM BAUER
TioJaime858 (1:59:03 AM): District Headwuarters
TioJaime858 (1:59:12 AM): Violence Erupts in Marrietta, GA
TioJaime858 (1:59:56 AM): sorried abotu something, rewinding
TioJaime858 (2:00:13 AM): gonna rewind w/captions
TioJaime858 (2:00:33 AM): Posse Comitatus
TioJaime858 (2:00:40 AM): whatever
TioJaime858 (2:00:59 AM): ooh ann-chick
TioJaime858 (2:01:09 AM): ann-nemesis
TioJaime858 (2:01:46 AM): for some reason i'd like to engage her in auto-erotic asphyxiation ooh yeah momma
TioJaime858 (2:02:13 AM): ooh yeah ann-chick
TioJaime858 (2:02:51 AM): oh yeah they're repositioning
TioJaime858 (2:03:38 AM): ooh yeah ann chick
TioJaime858 (2:03:58 AM): i do't like ann-nemesis
TioJaime858 (2:04:07 AM): 1:10:46
TioJaime858 (2:04:11 AM): 01:15:11
TioJaime858 (2:04:47 AM): yeah, in so many words, STFU kim
TioJaime858 (2:05:05 AM): ohyeahshe thinks jack's dead
TioJaime858 (2:05:22 AM): yeah click on the button that says "Analyze"
TioJaime858 (2:05:54 AM): ooh ann-chick
TioJaime858 (2:06:02 AM): ann-chick in teh bathroom
TioJaime858 (2:06:24 AM): 11 bad guys including a friendly
TioJaime858 (2:06:45 AM): ooh CTU chicks
TioJaime858 (2:06:54 AM): TONY ALMEIDA!!!
TioJaime858 (2:07:11 AM): i'd like ann-chick to break my protocols
TioJaime858 (2:07:56 AM): i wanna make out w/ann a/o ann-chick
TioJaime858 (2:09:14 AM): ensign ro
TioJaime858 (2:09:58 AM): civil unrest up and down the east coast
TioJaime858 (2:10:16 AM): militias going all nutso
TioJaime858 (2:10:57 AM): cuckoo
TioJaime858 (2:11:45 AM): ooh yeah calling out the national guard
TioJaime858 (2:12:01 AM): "we will not put up with racism and xenophobia"
TioJaime858 (2:12:04 AM): 1:22:59
TioJaime858 (2:12:07 AM): 1:27:23
TioJaime858 (2:12:36 AM): ooh turning on the smoke
TioJaime858 (2:13:16 AM): shooty-shooty!
TioJaime858 (2:14:02 AM): shoot him you tard
TioJaime858 (2:14:25 AM): ooh nice job momma
TioJaime858 (2:15:20 AM): making a getaway
TioJaime858 (2:15:25 AM): commando dude was hit
TioJaime858 (2:16:48 AM): "unacceptable. I want the law enforced"
TioJaime858 (2:17:33 AM): ooh hi ann-chick
TioJaime858 (2:17:42 AM): and by talk, he means "make out w/jimmy"
TioJaime858 (2:18:52 AM): 1:34:08
TioJaime858 (2:18:58 AM): 1:38:32
TioJaime858 (2:19:10 AM): KIM BAUER!!!
TioJaime858 (2:19:32 AM): did they find her tard bf?
TioJaime858 (2:20:49 AM): off the hook for everything!
TioJaime858 (2:20:58 AM): except for escaping
TioJaime858 (2:21:02 AM): tard
TioJaime858 (2:22:02 AM): and somehow kate warner has CIA clearance through her daddy
TioJaime858 (2:22:22 AM): uh oh
TioJaime858 (2:23:28 AM): when TONY ALMEIDA asks you what happened, please to not be telling him "it doesn't matter"
TioJaime858 (2:23:46 AM): OMG
TioJaime858 (2:24:28 AM): LADY I AM THE POLICE
TioJaime858 (2:24:38 AM): he's actually CTU, but eh
TioJaime858 (2:25:02 AM): ooh hi kim
TioJaime858 (2:25:04 AM): oh
TioJaime858 (2:25:12 AM): OK she's calling the BF tard
TioJaime858 (2:25:14 AM): WTF
TioJaime858 (2:25:42 AM):
TioJaime858 (2:26:02 AM): oh please let him be dying
TioJaime858 (2:26:38 AM): yeah no shit you shouldn't have done that shit
TioJaime858 (2:26:46 AM): and now he's breaking up w/KIM BAUER
TioJaime858 (2:26:57 AM): WTF is this stupid shit?
TioJaime858 (2:27:08 AM):
TioJaime858 (2:27:09 AM):
TioJaime858 (2:27:19 AM): wow that was fucking stupid
TioJaime858 (2:27:24 AM): hey bite me
TioJaime858 (2:27:29 AM): 1:51:20
TioJaime858 (2:27:32 AM): missed the timestamp
TioJaime858 (2:27:52 AM): ann-chick
TioJaime858 (2:28:28 AM): i would like to engage ann-chick in dry-humpage
TioJaime858 (2:28:42 AM): and mutual masturbation
TioJaime858 (2:28:45 AM): nobody reads these anyway
TioJaime858 (2:29:07 AM): frottage-city!
TioJaime858 (2:29:11 AM): ann-chick-boobs!
TioJaime858 (2:29:58 AM): developing in marietta
TioJaime858 (2:30:20 AM): national guard killed two
TioJaime858 (2:30:22 AM): eh
TioJaime858 (2:30:24 AM): pity
TioJaime858 (2:30:32 AM): other was a young boy
TioJaime858 (2:30:36 AM): middle eastern
TioJaime858 (2:30:37 AM): BFD
TioJaime858 (2:30:58 AM): dude, whatever the fuck ever
TioJaime858 (2:31:13 AM): this is somewhat unprecedented
TioJaime858 (2:31:50 AM): what w/a fictitious NUCULAR BOMB going off in the fictitious MOJAVE DESERT
TioJaime858 (2:32:58 AM): ooh hi red
TioJaime858 (2:34:16 AM): memory chip
TioJaime858 (2:34:23 AM): with source recordings
TioJaime858 (2:34:36 AM): shit
TioJaime858 (2:34:41 AM): inside somewhere...
TioJaime858 (2:34:49 AM): check his pooper
TioJaime858 (2:35:06 AM): just start opening things
TioJaime858 (2:35:17 AM): d'oh
TioJaime858 (2:35:35 AM): he should get captured soon?
TioJaime858 (2:35:53 AM): ann-chick
TioJaime858 (2:36:39 AM): i was somewhat kidding when i said it was inside of him
TioJaime858 (2:36:46 AM): 2:00:00
TioJaime858 (2:37:07 AM): good episode
TioJaime858 has left the chat room.

but then I thought, pinacoladaberg is sooooo much better

2005-06-27T23:04:00.000-07:00

A gem of a find from my good buddy Rafterman! And if he’s reading this, I know that you don’t like that name. Wait until I find something better for you…

The link Rafterman e-mailed to me is the first link in the blockquote caption. Enjoy!

fans of Bill Paxton's Coconut Pete songs from Club Dread!
10:20 PM
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: yo
Rafterman: check your email!!!
Rafterman: now!!!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: NP
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: did i eff kiemanh's # up?
Rafterman: three words
Rafterman: pina
Rafterman: colada
Rafterman: berg
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: 917 555 5555 (i changed the number, you animals. duh.)
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: no
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: No
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: NO
Rafterman: oh yeah
Rafterman: check your email
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: OH YEAH
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: OH HOLY JESUS
10:25 PM
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: that's rad!
Rafterman: hells yeah
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: suh-weet-ah
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: oh bill paxton is rad!
Rafterman: i was having a margarita, so I looked for margaritaville on itunes
Rafterman: but then I thought, pinacoladaberg is sooooo much better
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: Are you ready to go back to Titanic?
Rafterman: and found my way to his website
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: oh this song is the best!
Rafterman: sooooooo good
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: weird science links too
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: is this his page, or a fan page?
Rafterman: he page
Rafterman: his page
Rafterman: official bill paxton page
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: you are a badass.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: thank you for this musical bounty
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: you've made the blog
10:30 PM
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: "i'm too drunk to sing this song!"
Rafterman: haha
Rafterman: I shouldn't have smoked that bong
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: what a fucking dope-assed song!
Rafterman: yeah
Rafterman: these aren't on the club dread soundtrack
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: hey did i get kiemanh's number right? i tried it, but says the system's busy all night
Rafterman: so everyone was giving the soundtrack one star on amazon, because it didn't have this song
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: yeah, why the fuck wouldn't you put this on the soundtrack?
Rafterman: or these songs, rather
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: tards
Rafterman: but then one guy said you could get them from his website
Rafterman: bam
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: nice job dude
10:35 PM
Rafterman: that's the number I have
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: hmm
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: OK
Rafterman: it might be old
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: eh
Rafterman: you have his email?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: lemme see
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: oh that's all i have, apparently
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: naughty cal! i remember this song from teh movie
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: underwater bordello

fans of Bill Paxton's Coconut Pete songs from Club Dread!
10:20 PM JihadJimmyMWCCDF: yo Rafterman: check your email!!! Rafterman: now!!! JihadJimmyMWCCDF: NP JihadJimmyMWCCDF: did i eff kiemanh's # up? Rafterman: three words Rafterman: pina Rafterman: colada Rafterman: berg JihadJimmyMWCCDF: 917 555 5555 (i changed the number, you animals. duh.) JihadJimmyMWCCDF: no JihadJimmyMWCCDF: No JihadJimmyMWCCDF: NO Rafterman: oh yeah Rafterman: check your email JihadJimmyMWCCDF: OH YEAH JihadJimmyMWCCDF: OH HOLY JESUS 10:25 PM JihadJimmyMWCCDF: that's rad! Rafterman: hells yeah JihadJimmyMWCCDF: suh-weet-ah JihadJimmyMWCCDF: oh bill paxton is rad! Rafterman: i was having a margarita, so I looked for margaritaville on itunes Rafterman: but then I thought, pinacoladaberg is sooooo much better JihadJimmyMWCCDF: Are you ready to go back to Titanic? Rafterman: and found my way to his website JihadJimmyMWCCDF: oh this song is the best! Rafterman: sooooooo good JihadJimmyMWCCDF: weird science links too JihadJimmyMWCCDF: is this his page, or a fan page? Rafterman: he page Rafterman: his page Rafterman: official bill paxton page JihadJimmyMWCCDF: you are a badass. JihadJimmyMWCCDF: thank you for this musical bounty JihadJimmyMWCCDF: you've made the blog 10:30 PM JihadJimmyMWCCDF: "i'm too drunk to sing this song!" Rafterman: haha Rafterman: I shouldn't have smoked that bong JihadJimmyMWCCDF: what a fucking dope-assed song! Rafterman: yeah Rafterman: these aren't on the club dread soundtrack JihadJimmyMWCCDF: hey did i get kiemanh's number right? i tried it, but says the system's busy all night Rafterman: so everyone was giving the soundtrack one star on amazon, because it didn't have this song JihadJimmyMWCCDF: yeah, why the fuck wouldn't you put this on the soundtrack? Rafterman: or these songs, rather JihadJimmyMWCCDF: tards Rafterman: but then one guy said you could get them from his website Rafterman: bam JihadJimmyMWCCDF: nice job dude 10:35 PM Rafterman: that's the number I have JihadJimmyMWCCDF: hmm JihadJimmyMWCCDF: OK Rafterman: it might be old JihadJimmyMWCCDF: eh Rafterman: you have his email? JihadJimmyMWCCDF: lemme see JihadJimmyMWCCDF: oh that's all i have, apparently JihadJimmyMWCCDF: naughty cal! i remember this song from teh movie JihadJimmyMWCCDF: underwater bordello

In hindsight, I should've used SpacemanSpiff. Eh. Next time, hopefully i'll remember

Jihad Jimmy, Mininster of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

kinda got out of hand

2005-06-25T02:58:00.000-07:00

I'd tell you to go to the Blogspot Province, but shit, you're already here. Enjoy. If any exist, comments are to be found on the old Xanga Province archives. Click on the post titles to be led to the corresponding Xanga Province page in a separate window.

hope all is well,
Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

2:20 AM
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: oh you'll like my montage
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: fuck xanga, i'm finally gone, but not before my disembarking "fuck you"
2:45 AM
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: http://www.xanga.com/item.aspx?user=TioJaime&tab=weblogs&uid=291125392
Tinkleflower: hahah
Tinkleflower: cool
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: i just wanted a couple of fall of saigon pics
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: kinda got out of hand
Tinkleflower: i like the slut Tom Cruise bitch at the end
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: hey calm down there
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: they're not married anymore
Tinkleflower: i know, i know
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: and how can i get the sniper to align to the center of her cell?
2:50 AM
Tinkleflower: dunno.
Tinkleflower: I've had problems centering images in the blogs.

shit, the show sounds good streamed

2005-06-23T23:19:00.000-07:00

chatting w/MwHCock on tuesday, didn't post it until now. don't worry, you won't even notice the difference...

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

chatting w/MwHCock
11:51 AM
MwHCock: it's been 2 days
MwHCock: no SHoP update
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: working on one righ tnow
MwHCock: what is your other blog's address?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: tjalephone.blogspot.com
11:55 AM
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: SHoP updated
12:05 PM
MwHCock: i commented
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: shit, did you get it
12:10 PM
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: nice job man
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: shit, the show sounds good streamed
MwHCock: yeah
MwHCock: are you recording it?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: no
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: how can i do that?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: do i need some special hardware?
MwHCock: no audio jijack
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: like a radio shark or somethin?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: wow, this is better quality than the archives i have right now
MwHCock: http://www.rogueamoeba.com/audiohijack/
MwHCock: it is good quality
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: wow i can set up a timer too?
MwHCock: yeah
MwHCock: i use it to record a bbc show
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: ooh, and only $16?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: what kind of audio is this?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: will it be able to do it if you tell is just a random firefox stream?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: OK dude, gotta go
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: happy D&M-ing
MwHCock: iyou can record from firefox
MwHCock: where you going?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: lunch w/my dad
MwHCock: ok
MwHCock: later
12:15 PM
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: see ya

chatting w/MwHCock
11:51 AM MwHCock: it's been 2 days MwHCock: no SHoP update JihadJimmyMWCCDF: working on one righ tnow MwHCock: what is your other blog's address? JihadJimmyMWCCDF: tjalephone.blogspot.com 11:55 AM JihadJimmyMWCCDF: SHoP updated 12:05 PM MwHCock: i commented JihadJimmyMWCCDF: shit, did you get it 12:10 PM JihadJimmyMWCCDF: nice job man JihadJimmyMWCCDF: shit, the show sounds good streamed MwHCock: yeah MwHCock: are you recording it? JihadJimmyMWCCDF: no JihadJimmyMWCCDF: how can i do that? JihadJimmyMWCCDF: do i need some special hardware? MwHCock: no audio jijack JihadJimmyMWCCDF: like a radio shark or somethin? JihadJimmyMWCCDF: wow, this is better quality than the archives i have right now MwHCock: http://www.rogueamoeba.com/audiohijack/ MwHCock: it is good quality JihadJimmyMWCCDF: wow i can set up a timer too? MwHCock: yeah MwHCock: i use it to record a bbc show JihadJimmyMWCCDF: ooh, and only $16? JihadJimmyMWCCDF: what kind of audio is this? JihadJimmyMWCCDF: will it be able to do it if you tell is just a random firefox stream? JihadJimmyMWCCDF: OK dude, gotta go JihadJimmyMWCCDF: happy D&M-ing MwHCock: iyou can record from firefox MwHCock: where you going? JihadJimmyMWCCDF: lunch w/my dad MwHCock: ok MwHCock: later 12:15 PM JihadJimmyMWCCDF: see ya

24 Season 2, 12am - 1am

2005-06-21T21:37:00.000-07:00

3am Criticism of 24, Season 2, 12am - 1am
You are now in chat room “aimsucksbutt.”
TioJaime858 has entered the chat room.
TioJaime858 (8:44:03 PM): hello dere!
TioJaime858 (8:44:12 PM): OK gonna watch the next episode of 24 season 2
TioJaime858 (8:44:17 PM): and 3am Criticize it
TioJaime858 (8:44:41 PM): for the new blog
TioJaime858 (8:44:48 PM): lemme get it set up
TioJaime858 (8:44:57 PM): and i'll be eating through the episode, so it may be sparse
TioJaime858 (8:45:07 PM): but first lemme find the next episode in sequence
TioJaime858 (8:45:48 PM): OK we're due for 12am!
TioJaime858 (8:47:09 PM): and from what i remember, jack just hit tony after jimmy predicted that the seventh commando was the shooter
TioJaime858 (8:48:03 PM): OK let's see what the DVD menus want to spoil for me...
TioJaime858 (8:48:23 PM): OK accidentally clicked on the 2am episode
TioJaime858 (8:48:27 PM): jack gets captured
TioJaime858 (8:48:33 PM): and is about to be tortured
TioJaime858 (8:48:36 PM): FUCK YOU, DVD
TioJaime858 (8:48:56 PM): 12am DVD menu has jack holding somebody @ gunpoint
TioJaime858 (8:49:02 PM): not that that is a stretch
TioJaime858 (8:49:07 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON 24
TioJaime858 (8:49:11 PM): MICHELLE DESSLER!
TioJaime858 (8:49:16 PM): ANN-CHICK!
TioJaime858 (8:49:23 PM): PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER
TioJaime858 (8:49:41 PM): KIM BAUER!
TioJaime858 (8:49:57 PM): stupid girl
TioJaime858 (8:49:59 PM): JACK BAUER
TioJaime858 (8:50:10 PM): ok the dude wants *kate* warner
TioJaime858 (8:50:25 PM): did he break tony's ankle too?
TioJaime858 (8:50:34 PM): THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 12:00 AM AND 1:00 AM
TioJaime858 (8:50:54 PM): "do you trust me?"
TioJaime858 (8:51:17 PM): how did tony break his ankle?
TioJaime858 (8:51:35 PM): uh oh, security is letting jack through
TioJaime858 (8:51:38 PM): or are they?
TioJaime858 (8:51:51 PM): ha ha
TioJaime858 (8:51:54 PM): jack on the run
TioJaime858 (8:52:28 PM): yeah tell the chick that she's Bait
TioJaime858 (8:52:36 PM): and what would he want w/the terrorist-sister?
TioJaime858 (8:52:44 PM): and not terrorist-chick herself?
TioJaime858 (8:53:01 PM): "i'm not going to lie to you. this is very very dangerous"
TioJaime858 (8:53:24 PM): yeah, and flying a cessna w/a NUCLEAR BOMB wasn't?
TioJaime858 (8:53:29 PM): sorry, "nu-cular"
TioJaime858 (8:54:04 PM): ooh ann-chick's not-as-hot nemesis ratting ann-chick out
TioJaime858 (8:54:11 PM): president and ensign ro in LA
TioJaime858 (8:54:58 PM): oh it's the vice president
TioJaime858 (8:55:24 PM): "possibility we may not go through w/the attack"
TioJaime858 (8:55:34 PM): ooh yeah cypress recording might be fake
TioJaime858 (8:56:02 PM): "too late for second thoughts"
TioJaime858 (8:56:04 PM): well duh, no shit
TioJaime858 (8:56:40 PM): so you lauched bombers, NP. just don't give them the go for weapons
TioJaime858 (8:56:46 PM): oh it's krazy kim!
TioJaime858 (8:57:21 PM): you crazy mexidude!
TioJaime858 (8:57:39 PM): he just had a pregnant wife, give him a break dude!
TioJaime858 (8:57:55 PM): you crazy mexidude
TioJaime858 (8:57:59 PM): "please don't die!"
TioJaime858 (8:58:19 PM): hmm
TioJaime858 (8:58:33 PM): so can't jack just tell tony that somebody told him the tape was a ake?
TioJaime858 (8:58:36 PM): ooh, they're being followed
TioJaime858 (8:58:44 PM): is it ann chick?
TioJaime858 (8:59:09 PM): oh it's the foreign dude
TioJaime858 (8:59:39 PM): ooh yeah
TioJaime858 (8:59:46 PM): listen to the sneaky foreigner
TioJaime858 (8:59:57 PM): he wants to help you
TioJaime858 (9:00:06 PM): ooh hi ann-chick boobs
TioJaime858 (9:00:13 PM): gonna get some milk
TioJaime858 (9:02:27 PM): OK ann-chick lied to tony and said she didn't draw away the dude
TioJaime858 (9:02:40 PM): and also that ann-nemesis wants to step to her shit
TioJaime858 (9:02:48 PM): and i missed the timestamp
TioJaime858 (9:03:18 PM): putting the mexi-wife on the phone
TioJaime858 (9:03:26 PM): no!
TioJaime858 (9:03:42 PM): ramon! mi hijo!
TioJaime858 (9:04:22 PM): oh yay, they're going to monterrey!
TioJaime858 (9:04:31 PM): and then he'll let go of KIM BAUER
TioJaime858 (9:05:09 PM): ooh yeah
TioJaime858 (9:05:17 PM): jack bauer going all jack bauer on somebody
TioJaime858 (9:05:32 PM): what was the point of bringing kate if you're just gonna leave her in the car?
TioJaime858 (9:06:18 PM): OK so jack got the drop on this dude?
TioJaime858 (9:07:03 PM): jonathan wallace, captain
TioJaime858 (9:07:12 PM): la la la
TioJaime858 (9:07:16 PM): he's the missing commando
TioJaime858 (9:07:22 PM): "you're the seventh man"
TioJaime858 (9:07:31 PM): "i was responsible for two things"
TioJaime858 (9:07:44 PM): making sure the bomb went off, planting the cypress recording
TioJaime858 (9:08:01 PM): and it's big oil
TioJaime858 (9:08:22 PM): he's about to do something w/electricity....
TioJaime858 (9:08:26 PM): electricity
TioJaime858 (9:08:34 PM): hmm
TioJaime858 (9:08:40 PM): and the sign signalled somebody
TioJaime858 (9:08:47 PM): uh oh
TioJaime858 (9:08:51 PM): that's not good
TioJaime858 (9:09:01 PM): OK and now they have kate warner
TioJaime858 (9:09:18 PM): and the foreigner knocked the dude out
TioJaime858 (9:09:47 PM): so really, who cares when he was signalled
TioJaime858 (9:10:30 PM): and it's something about the warner's company?
TioJaime858 (9:11:12 PM): and now they're bringing kate in
TioJaime858 (9:11:23 PM): 12:26:46
TioJaime858 (9:11:29 PM): 12:31:06
TioJaime858 (9:11:41 PM): oh wow, it's District
TioJaime858 (9:12:38 PM): and now chief-of-staff jack wants to talk to jack behind PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER's back
TioJaime858 (9:13:00 PM): OK chief-of-staff mike
TioJaime858 (9:13:04 PM): not mike
TioJaime858 (9:14:16 PM): i don't like the ann-nemesis
TioJaime858 (9:14:24 PM): ooh hi ann-chick
TioJaime858 (9:14:38 PM): i would like to make out w/her in front of the actual ann
TioJaime858 (9:14:42 PM): and then vice versa
TioJaime858 (9:15:44 PM): oh my ann-chick needs a jimmy-spanking
TioJaime858 (9:15:56 PM): and i think i'm just the jimmy to provide her w/said spanking
TioJaime858 (9:16:45 PM): yeah kim, it's your fault! "you pointed this gun at me"
TioJaime858 (9:16:56 PM): "you ruined my life. it's all your fault"
TioJaime858 (9:17:22 PM): OK play the dead-dad card
TioJaime858 (9:17:35 PM): nice job kim
TioJaime858 (9:17:43 PM): and for once, no, it wasn't your fault
TioJaime858 (9:18:42 PM): yeah nice job you're able to escape before trying to escape
TioJaime858 (9:18:57 PM): OK now you're fucked, mexidude
TioJaime858 (9:19:11 PM): torture him!
TioJaime858 (9:19:25 PM): nice job foreign dude!
TioJaime858 (9:19:47 PM): he's gonna approach in a sweep pattern
TioJaime858 (9:19:50 PM): well hello mr. fancypants
TioJaime858 (9:20:08 PM): 12:39:50
TioJaime858 (9:20:14 PM): 12:44:14
TioJaime858 (9:20:31 PM): i don't like ann-nemesis-cunt
TioJaime858 (9:20:50 PM): i would much rather engage ann-chick herself in heavy petting
TioJaime858 (9:21:30 PM): ooh yeah heavy petting
TioJaime858 (9:21:50 PM): ooh and now it's time for some office-CTUin
TioJaime858 (9:22:15 PM): you sneaky bitch-momma
TioJaime858 (9:24:06 PM): soldier dude gonna take kate, eventually gonna tell jack where the evidence is
TioJaime858 (9:24:52 PM): ooh yeah
TioJaime858 (9:25:10 PM): umm, what did he say in the car?
TioJaime858 (9:25:24 PM): 12:49:17
TioJaime858 (9:25:28 PM): 12:53:41
TioJaime858 (9:25:52 PM): yeah good thing you're keeping kim so close to the standoff
TioJaime858 (9:26:00 PM): who's this guy?
TioJaime858 (9:26:00 PM): it's Danny!
TioJaime858 (9:26:23 PM): ooh yeah the kids
TioJaime858 (9:26:38 PM): LOL
TioJaime858 (9:26:46 PM): she's listening to the line and she was just called a bitch
TioJaime858 (9:26:52 PM): h aha
TioJaime858 (9:26:57 PM): ha ha
TioJaime858 (9:27:31 PM): just do it mexidude
TioJaime858 (9:27:48 PM): loco ramon!
TioJaime858 (9:28:04 PM): STFU kim
TioJaime858 (9:28:15 PM): whoops
TioJaime858 (9:28:30 PM): is mexidude mexidead?
TioJaime858 (9:28:45 PM): and it's the veep again
TioJaime858 (9:29:30 PM): well, wouldn't you wanna call this off if at all possible?
TioJaime858 (9:30:40 PM): OK this is where they're losign me
TioJaime858 (9:30:49 PM): how is not bombing somebody a disaster?
TioJaime858 (9:31:25 PM): ooh yeah get in the trunk kate
TioJaime858 (9:31:42 PM): ann-chick!
TioJaime858 (9:31:48 PM): mexidead!Q
TioJaime858 (9:32:09 PM): ooh yeah they're tracking kate
TioJaime858 (9:32:17 PM): and now they're shooting
TioJaime858 (9:32:24 PM): 1:00:00
TioJaime858 (9:32:32 PM): OK this was the stupidest episode this season
TioJaime858 (9:32:41 PM): we discovered nothing new, learned nothing important
TioJaime858 (9:32:59 PM): this is what's known as the Terri Gets Amnesia Episode
TioJaime858 has left the chat room.

Family Guy - "Road to Rhode Island"

2005-06-20T15:29:00.000-07:00

these 30 minute episodes make for really short 3amCs, especially when the randomness prevents coherent thought oh my part...

jihad jimmy

3am Criticism of The Family Guy, "Road to Rhode Island"
You are now in chat room “aimfelchesgoats.”
TioJaime858 has entered the chat room.
TioJaime858 (3:06:05 PM): hello dere
TioJaime858 (3:06:08 PM): i'm @ home in san jose
TioJaime858 (3:06:27 PM): gonna watch some Family Guy w/my little brother
TioJaime858 (3:06:36 PM): "Road to Rhode Island"
TioJaime858 (3:06:55 PM): wow our TV is shitty
TioJaime858 (3:07:05 PM): "somewhere near austin Texas
TioJaime858 (3:07:06 PM): "
TioJaime858 (3:07:38 PM): it's a puppy farm in texas
TioJaime858 (3:08:18 PM): i like the alcoholic dog
TioJaime858 (3:09:36 PM): i also like the willing suspension of disbelief
TioJaime858 (3:11:00 PM): "not just Jugs or Cremesicle"
TioJaime858 (3:11:15 PM): "and an inner ear infection"
TioJaime858 (3:13:23 PM): heh, they worked in a snuff film
TioJaime858 (3:14:37 PM): "that's it mr. giraffe, lick off all the marmalade"
TioJaime858 (3:16:13 PM): heh, do you really want to hurt me
TioJaime858 (3:16:27 PM): they're playing six degrees of kevin bacon
TioJaime858 (3:16:41 PM): LOL
TioJaime858 (3:17:07 PM): "you suck!"
TioJaime858 (3:18:15 PM): yay for wacky incest
TioJaime858 (3:20:11 PM): "I was the one who could talk"
TioJaime858 (3:20:26 PM): "i bet you lost your virginity to a mechanical bull"
TioJaime858 (3:24:17 PM): that was cool how brian's head turned slowly towards stewie
TioJaime858 (3:25:04 PM): and now they've broken into song
TioJaime858 (3:25:46 PM): like a masochist in newport
TioJaime858 (3:27:48 PM): "is it kitty?"
TioJaime858 has left the chat room.

3am Criticism of 24 Season Two, 11pm - 12am

2005-06-20T01:07:00.000-07:00

One more before I go to bed...

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

3am criticism of 24 season 2, 11pm - 12am
ooh baby the bomb just went off
You are now in chat room “BiteMeAIM.”
TioJaime858 has entered the chat room.
TioJaime858 (12:16:49 AM): hello dere
TioJaime858 (12:17:07 AM): and WTF, i can have Bite Me AiM as a chat room name, but not 24seas211pm?
TioJaime858 (12:17:12 AM): dumbfucks
TioJaime858 (12:17:28 AM): here we go
TioJaime858 (12:17:36 AM): PREVIOUSLY ON 24
TioJaime858 (12:17:45 AM): PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER
TioJaime858 (12:18:04 AM): TONY ALMEIDA
TioJaime858 (12:18:14 AM): that's the first time i've seen tony on the opening sequence
TioJaime858 (12:18:24 AM): i hope i've been spelling it right so far
TioJaime858 (12:18:27 AM): KIM BAUER
TioJaime858 (12:18:37 AM): !
TioJaime858 (12:18:40 AM): JACK BAUER!
TioJaime858 (12:18:56 AM): did george mason say "parachute" last episode?"
TioJaime858 (12:19:15 AM): THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 11:00 PM AND 12:00 AM
TioJaime858 (12:19:29 AM): wow nice graphic of the mushroom cloud
TioJaime858 (12:19:48 AM): why would there be a shadow from the mushroom cloud?
TioJaime858 (12:20:20 AM): it's pronounced nu-cular!
TioJaime858 (12:20:34 AM): well OK then!
TioJaime858 (12:20:38 AM): pep talk over!
TioJaime858 (12:20:40 AM): no more bomb!
TioJaime858 (12:20:51 AM): and yet we're still here
TioJaime858 (12:20:57 AM): i'm still 3am Criticizing
TioJaime858 (12:21:00 AM): and you're still reading
TioJaime858 (12:21:18 AM): and kim's still crying
TioJaime858 (12:21:24 AM): which is a nice respite from her fucking shit up
TioJaime858 (12:21:34 AM): jack flaring again!
TioJaime858 (12:21:53 AM): CTU chopper!
TioJaime858 (12:22:00 AM): "whose chopper is this?"
TioJaime858 (12:23:19 AM): nice job CTU
TioJaime858 (12:23:40 AM): dude, the foreign national is standing right there
TioJaime858 (12:24:55 AM): ha ha terrorist bitch-ass
TioJaime858 (12:25:07 AM): andnow ann-chick is interrogating you
TioJaime858 (12:25:08 AM): ha ha
TioJaime858 (12:25:27 AM): eh, just torture the fucker
TioJaime858 (12:25:38 AM): ooh yeah guantanamo
TioJaime858 (12:25:57 AM): hmm
TioJaime858 (12:26:08 AM): sayed ali is denying the meeting took place
TioJaime858 (12:26:30 AM): ooh hi ann-chick
TioJaime858 (12:26:35 AM): i wanna lick her face
TioJaime858 (12:26:55 AM): and now it's getting stickier
TioJaime858 (12:27:21 AM): ooh yeah audio analysizing
TioJaime858 (12:28:07 AM): black dude says there's no doubt that the recording is authentic
TioJaime858 (12:28:15 AM): ann-chick in the meeting
TioJaime858 (12:29:04 AM): ooh
TioJaime858 (12:29:13 AM): "your experience as an interrogator is limited"
TioJaime858 (12:29:47 AM): meanwhile, aboard Air Force One...
TioJaime858 (12:30:03 AM): get over it, president dude
TioJaime858 (12:30:14 AM): oh! it wasn't bauer
TioJaime858 (12:31:03 AM): and the president getting the report confirming the Cypress recordings
TioJaime858 (12:31:16 AM): yeah no shit you don't have the option of not responding
TioJaime858 (12:31:41 AM): ooh yeah
TioJaime858 (12:31:49 AM): emergency session of congress 11:14:07
TioJaime858 (12:31:53 AM): 11:18:18
TioJaime858 (12:32:03 AM): during which he'll ask for a formal declaration of war
TioJaime858 (12:32:06 AM): ooh ann chick
TioJaime858 (12:32:22 AM): bitch-fest?
TioJaime858 (12:33:13 AM): 8-10 weeks for full-scale invasion
TioJaime858 (12:33:17 AM): rolling start
TioJaime858 (12:33:18 AM): ooh yeah
TioJaime858 (12:33:32 AM): ooh yeah
TioJaime858 (12:33:38 AM): surgical strikes starting in 6 hours
TioJaime858 (12:34:04 AM): deputy prime minister calling for the president
TioJaime858 (12:34:14 AM): oh just invade his shit
TioJaime858 (12:35:16 AM): deputy prime minister trying to blow smoke up the POTUS's ass... la la la
TioJaime858 (12:35:22 AM): "please don't bomb our shit"
TioJaime858 (12:35:37 AM): "you'll hear from us soon"
TioJaime858 (12:35:43 AM): oh yes motherfuckers
TioJaime858 (12:35:49 AM): they're transferring sayed ali
TioJaime858 (12:35:55 AM): and here's where teh shit gets fucked up
TioJaime858 (12:36:05 AM): oh yeah, still pissed about your son?
TioJaime858 (12:36:22 AM): San Jose Sheriff's dept!
TioJaime858 (12:36:38 AM): didn't know we had a sheriff
TioJaime858 (12:36:44 AM): since it's Santa Clara County
TioJaime858 (12:36:52 AM): jack leaving CTU...
TioJaime858 (12:36:59 AM): or is he?
TioJaime858 (12:37:03 AM): making a phone call first
TioJaime858 (12:37:26 AM): WTF?
TioJaime858 (12:37:31 AM): not sure what's happening...
TioJaime858 (12:37:38 AM): ann-chick looking kinda suspicious
TioJaime858 (12:38:02 AM): ann-chick voicing concerns about recording
TioJaime858 (12:38:04 AM): ooh hi boobs
TioJaime858 (12:38:20 AM): boobs!
TioJaime858 (12:38:31 AM): i wanna make out w/ann-chick
TioJaime858 (12:38:35 AM): and ann herself
TioJaime858 (12:39:05 AM): yeah eff you terrorist
TioJaime858 (12:39:45 AM): should've killed his kids anyway
TioJaime858 (12:39:46 AM): oops
TioJaime858 (12:39:52 AM): sayed ali was shot
TioJaime858 (12:40:08 AM): 11:26:57
TioJaime858 (12:40:13 AM): 11:31:09
TioJaime858 (12:40:32 AM): hmm, this complicates things
TioJaime858 (12:40:53 AM): now jack thinks ali was telling the truth
TioJaime858 (12:41:52 AM): ooh tony getting pissy
TioJaime858 (12:42:13 AM): see, there's a reason this show isn't called The Tony Almeida Show
TioJaime858 (12:42:16 AM): it's because jack is right
TioJaime858 (12:42:22 AM): this should be good
TioJaime858 (12:42:25 AM): yeah stupid kim
TioJaime858 (12:42:29 AM): the store's closed
TioJaime858 (12:42:42 AM): you still have your gun?
TioJaime858 (12:42:56 AM): WTF?
TioJaime858 (12:43:00 AM): kim you tard
TioJaime858 (12:43:18 AM): you stupid tard of a chick
TioJaime858 (12:43:23 AM): he's gonna get shot
TioJaime858 (12:43:56 AM): 10-30k american casualties
TioJaime858 (12:44:22 AM): phone call for the president
TioJaime858 (12:44:25 AM): it's jack bauer
TioJaime858 (12:44:40 AM): but it's important enough to interrupt
TioJaime858 (12:45:43 AM): yeah sayed ali was assassinated
TioJaime858 (12:45:57 AM): blah blah blah don't wanna take military action based on erroneous information
TioJaime858 (12:46:06 AM): ha ha jab at bush ha ha
TioJaime858 (12:46:11 AM): 11:37:16
TioJaime858 (12:46:15 AM): 11:41:28
TioJaime858 (12:46:33 AM): "This is Dessler"
TioJaime858 (12:47:07 AM): Usef Auda
TioJaime858 (12:47:11 AM): not usef audi
TioJaime858 (12:47:18 AM): ooh kate warner!
TioJaime858 (12:47:30 AM): ooh yeah momma
TioJaime858 (12:47:34 AM): "it's a long story"
TioJaime858 (12:48:05 AM): agent gooker is gonna debrief her
TioJaime858 (12:48:13 AM): meanwhile, aboard Air Force One...
TioJaime858 (12:49:09 AM): "telephone conversation w/jack bauer keeps replaying in my head"
TioJaime858 (12:49:19 AM): liability-licious
TioJaime858 (12:49:29 AM): oh stop speaking so presidential
TioJaime858 (12:49:36 AM): "everyone except jack bauer"
TioJaime858 (12:49:44 AM): yeah that sounds very leader-riffic
TioJaime858 (12:50:11 AM): was mike cry8ing?
TioJaime858 (12:50:25 AM): crying
TioJaime858 (12:50:31 AM): there was a tear moving down his left cheek
TioJaime858 (12:50:57 AM): yeah fuck you foreigner
TioJaime858 (12:51:52 AM): hey, maybe the prevention of your arab country getting all blow'd up is worth something
TioJaime858 (12:52:10 AM): somebody planted evidence to frame ali
TioJaime858 (12:52:20 AM): and he's talking to jack
TioJaime858 (12:52:30 AM): meridian and moorpark!
TioJaime858 (12:52:40 AM): this dude wants marie warner
TioJaime858 (12:52:55 AM): and oh yes, it was the missing commando!
TioJaime858 (12:52:57 AM): damn i'm good
TioJaime858 (12:52:59 AM): 11:48
TioJaime858 (12:53:00 AM): something
TioJaime858 (12:53:02 AM): 11:52:30
TioJaime858 (12:53:11 AM): ooh kim yeah
TioJaime858 (12:53:25 AM): Touch it.
TioJaime858 (12:53:36 AM): uh oh
TioJaime858 (12:53:54 AM): you dumbfuck
TioJaime858 (12:54:10 AM): ooh yeah get some guns
TioJaime858 (12:54:15 AM): oh he's just calling the cops
TioJaime858 (12:54:27 AM): Soledad Canyon road off route 14!
TioJaime858 (12:54:31 AM): oh he's gonna die
TioJaime858 (12:54:48 AM): uh oh
TioJaime858 (12:55:01 AM): oh this isn't gonna end well
TioJaime858 (12:55:05 AM): NO DON'T GET YOUR GUN YOU TARD
TioJaime858 (12:55:27 AM): OH JUST SHOOT HIM
TioJaime858 (12:55:59 AM): and now he's getting bread
TioJaime858 (12:56:04 AM): kinda like that aerosmith video
TioJaime858 (12:56:13 AM): should've shot him
TioJaime858 (12:56:23 AM): "you're gonna have to trust me"
TioJaime858 (12:56:26 AM): ooh ann-chick
TioJaime858 (12:56:42 AM): WTF is he paying for it?
TioJaime858 (12:56:52 AM): yeah you're not a criminal
TioJaime858 (12:56:54 AM): you tard
TioJaime858 (12:57:16 AM): Palmdale!
TioJaime858 (12:57:22 AM): oh shit
TioJaime858 (12:57:26 AM): Ok we're fucked
TioJaime858 (12:57:33 AM): i mean *you're* fucked
TioJaime858 (12:57:39 AM): oh crazy mesxidude
TioJaime858 (12:57:41 AM): oops
TioJaime858 (12:57:56 AM): stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid kim
TioJaime858 (12:57:59 AM): STUPID KIM
TioJaime858 (12:58:03 AM): dammit
TioJaime858 (12:58:11 AM): ooh ann-chick
TioJaime858 (12:58:19 AM): need you some humpage, perhaps?
TioJaime858 (12:58:56 AM): wait, did the dude want kate or marie warner?
TioJaime858 (12:59:00 AM): maybe it was kate
TioJaime858 (12:59:09 AM): ooh janky mulatto chick
TioJaime858 (12:59:11 AM): mulatta
TioJaime858 (12:59:40 AM): thought kim was being held hostage
TioJaime858 (12:59:56 AM): ooh tony
TioJaime858 (1:00:02 AM): i mean, whoa tony
TioJaime858 (1:00:30 AM): another instance of jack not being able to tell anybody anything
TioJaime858 (1:00:34 AM): and now he just hit tony
TioJaime858 (1:00:36 AM): 12:00:00
TioJaime858 (1:00:43 AM): fucking sweet!
TioJaime858 (1:01:15 AM): yeahnice visual effects, Fuzzy Logic
TioJaime858 (1:02:00 AM): only 8 more episodes to go? maybe 7
TioJaime858 (1:02:02 AM): but it's late
TioJaime858 (1:02:06 AM): OK goodnight kids
TioJaime858 has left the chat room.

3am Criticism of 24 Season Two, 10pm - 11pm

2005-06-20T00:13:00.000-07:00

So, we meet again...

Didn't put this on the SHoP, as this was happening long before I was invited to the blog. But if you're here from the SHoP, welcome! No shame in plugging my director's cut of jimmy on the high-traffic blog...

enjoy, there's buttloads more where this came from. and take a look around, see the archives grow right before your eyes w/o having to visit the xanga province.

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

ps- keeping this short because the 24 DVD menu screen is playing in the background and it keeps playing the 24 theme song over and over. that got annoying fast.

24, season two, 10pm-11pm
You are now in chat room “mangina.”
TioJaime858 has entered the chat room.
TioJaime858 (11:06:25 PM): EFF YOU AIM
TioJaime858 (11:06:26 PM): TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH
TioJaime858 (11:06:45 PM): HOW HARD IS IT TO HAVE A CHAT ROOM NAMED "24seas211pm"?
TioJaime858 (11:06:49 PM): assholes
TioJaime858 (11:06:54 PM): so hello dere
TioJaime858 (11:09:23 PM): and we're still waiting
TioJaime858 (11:09:32 PM): because i jsut have to set up iTunes to update Sookie
TioJaime858 (11:09:44 PM): who apparently has twice as much D&M as I would have liked
TioJaime858 (11:11:25 PM): OK so now i'm copying the 144 D&M clips from Emily to Sookie
TioJaime858 (11:11:39 PM): but let's get ~~retarded~~ it started
TioJaime858 (11:11:51 PM): and by it, i mean 3am Criticism of 24, Season Two!
TioJaime858 (11:11:55 PM): i left off about a year ago
TioJaime858 (11:12:06 PM): when my roommate moved away and took his copy of 24
TioJaime858 (11:12:19 PM): my parents recently bought me seasons 2 and 3 on DVD for my b-day
TioJaime858 (11:12:36 PM): i also reserve the right to insert links above
TioJaime858 (11:12:37 PM): OK
TioJaime858 (11:12:42 PM): hopefully i remembered how to do this
TioJaime858 (11:13:01 PM): but lucky for us, i was reading my 3amC's when I was watching the DVDs again
TioJaime858 (11:13:05 PM): so let's get to work!
TioJaime858 (11:13:46 PM): and still haven't really decided where to put this
TioJaime858 (11:13:54 PM): will probably just put this on TJ:A1
TioJaime858 (11:14:00 PM): PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER!
TioJaime858 (11:14:10 PM): whoa
TioJaime858 (11:14:12 PM): wrong episode
TioJaime858 (11:14:31 PM): whoa, it wasn't 11pm that was next
TioJaime858 (11:14:35 PM): it was 10pm
TioJaime858 (11:14:37 PM): and SHIT
TioJaime858 (11:14:51 PM): SPOILERS IN THE DVD MENUS AGAIN YOU ASSHOLES
TioJaime858 (11:14:56 PM): i saw a mushroom cloud
TioJaime858 (11:17:05 PM): OK here we go
TioJaime858 (11:17:06 PM): again
TioJaime858 (11:17:07 PM): 24
TioJaime858 (11:17:12 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON 24
TioJaime858 (11:17:17 PM): GEORGE MASON
TioJaime858 (11:17:18 PM): !
TioJaime858 (11:17:25 PM): stepping down
TioJaime858 (11:17:28 PM): KIM BAUER!
TioJaime858 (11:17:47 PM): PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER!!!
TioJaime858 (11:17:56 PM): nosferatu-bitch!
TioJaime858 (11:18:04 PM): MARIE WARNER!!!
TioJaime858 (11:18:06 PM): oops
TioJaime858 (11:18:17 PM): JACK BAUER!!!
TioJaime858 (11:18:21 PM): yeah bitches!
TioJaime858 (11:18:31 PM): ooh, look it's a bomb
TioJaime858 (11:18:43 PM): THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 10:00PM AND 11:00PM
TioJaime858 (11:18:51 PM): working on the bomb in hangar 12
TioJaime858 (11:19:06 PM): bomb dudes!
TioJaime858 (11:19:15 PM): ooh reiko aylseworth
TioJaime858 (11:19:19 PM): i believe that's ann-chick
TioJaime858 (11:19:55 PM): this episode's gonna suck if it's 50 mins of watching the bomb squad
TioJaime858 (11:20:04 PM): George Mason!
TioJaime858 (11:20:11 PM): thought he stepped down
TioJaime858 (11:20:36 PM): nice job closure-dude!
TioJaime858 (11:20:49 PM): hmm
TioJaime858 (11:20:55 PM): bomb dudes panicking?
TioJaime858 (11:21:03 PM): "is there a problem?"
TioJaime858 (11:21:23 PM): no way to disarm this bomb!
TioJaime858 (11:21:55 PM): they're gonna fly the bomb out, ooh yeah!
TioJaime858 (11:22:10 PM): how much time?
TioJaime858 (11:22:12 PM): 55 minutes!
TioJaime858 (11:22:20 PM): i wonder if there'll be a next episode?!?
TioJaime858 (11:22:24 PM): 10:05:18
TioJaime858 (11:22:28 PM): and kim is on teh highway!
TioJaime858 (11:22:35 PM): and luckily there's a car coming
TioJaime858 (11:22:45 PM): or two motorcycles
TioJaime858 (11:23:02 PM): and an el camino!
TioJaime858 (11:23:08 PM): that stands for The Camino...
TioJaime858 (11:23:15 PM): trying to get to San Jose!
TioJaime858 (11:23:22 PM): "santa clara, actually!"
TioJaime858 (11:23:24 PM): whoa
TioJaime858 (11:23:36 PM): that's just trippy
TioJaime858 (11:23:40 PM): oops
TioJaime858 (11:23:49 PM): ooh nice move chick
TioJaime858 (11:24:01 PM): that sucks
TioJaime858 (11:24:12 PM): got your shit shot out because he was trying to be nice
TioJaime858 (11:24:18 PM): or rapalicious
TioJaime858 (11:25:09 PM): president is tinkering w/ideas
TioJaime858 (11:25:18 PM): could fly it into the ocean
TioJaime858 (11:25:45 PM): blah blah blah environmental impact
TioJaime858 (11:26:12 PM): BFD, get the fucking bomb out of LA
TioJaime858 (11:26:36 PM): again, BFD isolated hikers and campers
TioJaime858 (11:26:43 PM): WTF, fall out over las vegas?
TioJaime858 (11:26:46 PM): eff that!
TioJaime858 (11:27:15 PM): umm, what about fallout from the desert?
TioJaime858 (11:27:47 PM): ooh, it's a suicide mission!
TioJaime858 (11:28:01 PM): yeah president palmer
TioJaime858 (11:28:04 PM): so you lose a dude
TioJaime858 (11:28:06 PM): BFD
TioJaime858 (11:28:36 PM): a few volunteers for the pilot
TioJaime858 (11:28:49 PM): oohyeah family take-carage!
TioJaime858 (11:29:11 PM): ooh yeah
TioJaime858 (11:29:25 PM): oh yeah maybe george mason is a bad idea
TioJaime858 (11:29:42 PM): load this bomb, we are a go!
TioJaime858 (11:29:49 PM): that's right motherfuckers!
TioJaime858 (11:29:52 PM): 10:12:51
TioJaime858 (11:30:00 PM): 10:17:05
TioJaime858 (11:30:14 PM): tony almeida!
TioJaime858 (11:30:24 PM): new dude?
TioJaime858 (11:30:27 PM): usef audi?
TioJaime858 (11:30:41 PM): not sur ewho he is
TioJaime858 (11:30:44 PM): because i was busy blogging
TioJaime858 (11:31:00 PM): lemme rewind
TioJaime858 (11:31:24 PM): ann-chick!
TioJaime858 (11:31:27 PM): tony almeida!
TioJaime858 (11:31:56 PM): some government liason who helped CTU into sayed ali's safehouse
TioJaime858 (11:32:25 PM): ann-chick
TioJaime858 (11:32:27 PM): yeah momma
TioJaime858 (11:33:06 PM): you stupid C.U.N.T.
TioJaime858 (11:33:08 PM): just do your job
TioJaime858 (11:33:29 PM): an encrypted hard drive!
TioJaime858 (11:33:40 PM): loading the bomb, dude!
TioJaime858 (11:33:46 PM): haven't found Kim yet
TioJaime858 (11:34:13 PM): shit man
TioJaime858 (11:34:32 PM): there's gotta be a second or two to find otu of somebody else would rather fly the bomb-plane
TioJaime858 (11:34:39 PM): hi kim
TioJaime858 (11:34:41 PM): dumbass
TioJaime858 (11:34:48 PM): oh it's anothercar
TioJaime858 (11:35:24 PM): ooh hi jeep chick 4usf627
TioJaime858 (11:35:26 PM): CA plates
TioJaime858 (11:35:36 PM): ooh yeah momma
TioJaime858 (11:35:45 PM): heh
TioJaime858 (11:35:54 PM): yeah get this chick to take you to san jose
TioJaime858 (11:36:10 PM): OK kim, just STFU RIGHT NOW
TioJaime858 (11:36:12 PM): jesus
TioJaime858 (11:36:43 PM): if I was president, i'd fly the bomb far, far away from Las Vegas
TioJaime858 (11:37:26 PM): ooh yeah goodbye terrorist-sister
TioJaime858 (11:38:28 PM): 10:24:31
TioJaime858 (11:38:33 PM): 10:28:45
TioJaime858 (11:38:47 PM): oh it's a statement for tomorrow morning
TioJaime858 (11:39:10 PM): what about the seventh commando?
TioJaime858 (11:39:26 PM): did we ever find out what happened to that dude?
TioJaime858 (11:39:34 PM): president wants to fly to LA
TioJaime858 (11:39:47 PM): his staff doesn't want him to
TioJaime858 (11:40:22 PM): jack bauer dude!
TioJaime858 (11:40:45 PM): so maybe you're gonna have air force 1 intercept jack bauer in mid-air?
TioJaime858 (11:40:50 PM): not that there's enough time
TioJaime858 (11:41:06 PM): maybe they should give him a fighter escort or something?
TioJaime858 (11:41:33 PM): kim w/the hopefully-rapist chick
TioJaime858 (11:41:39 PM): "i'm in a plane"
TioJaime858 (11:42:26 PM): nice job kim
TioJaime858 (11:42:33 PM): see what you did this time?
TioJaime858 (11:42:44 PM): yeah just get to san jose you dumbfuck
TioJaime858 (11:43:02 PM): yes you have been so mean and so bad BECAUSE YOU'RE A DUMBFUCK
TioJaime858 (11:43:06 PM): now take your shirt off
TioJaime858 (11:43:21 PM): is this chick gonna molest kim soon?
TioJaime858 (11:44:39 PM): Ok how's kim gonna fuck this up now?
TioJaime858 (11:44:42 PM): 10:35:07
TioJaime858 (11:44:50 PM): 10:39:25
TioJaime858 (11:45:16 PM): jeep-chick letting kim go
TioJaime858 (11:45:27 PM): oh hi ann-chick
TioJaime858 (11:45:46 PM): decrypted the hard drive!
TioJaime858 (11:46:01 PM): recording of conversation between terrorist-dude and some government officials
TioJaime858 (11:46:25 PM): three countries knew about bomb, bought it for exploda-muslim dude
TioJaime858 (11:46:30 PM): ooh yeah ann-chick
TioJaime858 (11:46:55 PM): they didn't ask tony for an authorization code or anything?
TioJaime858 (11:47:36 PM): confirmation w/in the hour of terrorist dudes
TioJaime858 (11:48:02 PM): OK shouldn't a president ask what three countries were the ones?
TioJaime858 (11:48:34 PM): i like how the Air Force One magazines are in the protectors like in doctor's offices
TioJaime858 (11:48:42 PM): waah waah waah, gotta bomb muslims
TioJaime858 (11:48:51 PM): and now you're quoting lincoln
TioJaime858 (11:49:15 PM): cessna time!
TioJaime858 (11:49:42 PM): WTF?
TioJaime858 (11:49:51 PM): sounds in the cessna
TioJaime858 (11:49:56 PM): LOL
TioJaime858 (11:50:01 PM): it's george mason
TioJaime858 (11:50:14 PM): you crazy guy
TioJaime858 (11:50:44 PM): you crazy crazy crazy george mason
TioJaime858 (11:50:53 PM): that's the funniest thing i've seen on 24!
TioJaime858 (11:51:29 PM): george mason didn't have to hide until the final approach
TioJaime858 (11:51:40 PM): he could've popped out after they took off
TioJaime858 (11:51:43 PM): "supplies!"
TioJaime858 (11:52:14 PM): not like jack would've turned the plane around
TioJaime858 (11:53:00 PM): that sucks
TioJaime858 (11:53:04 PM): poor george mason
TioJaime858 (11:53:07 PM): i liked that guy
TioJaime858 (11:53:17 PM): in real life he's married to nina meyers
TioJaime858 (11:53:20 PM): 10:48:10
TioJaime858 (11:53:25 PM): 10:52:22
TioJaime858 (11:53:37 PM): yeah jack dude
TioJaime858 (11:53:53 PM): will four minutes be enough?
TioJaime858 (11:54:07 PM): "i'm bailing out, and george is taking the plane down"
TioJaime858 (11:54:15 PM): that's cool
TioJaime858 (11:54:24 PM): "mason got on board-- don't ask me how"
TioJaime858 (11:54:52 PM): hey fuck you foreigner
TioJaime858 (11:55:00 PM): "we americans what?
TioJaime858 (11:55:02 PM): dick
TioJaime858 (11:55:13 PM): ooh ensign ro on Air Force One
TioJaime858 (11:56:01 PM): oh yes Second Wave had the backing of three governments
TioJaime858 (11:56:18 PM): what a tard of a president
TioJaime858 (11:56:41 PM): oh yes invasion-licious
TioJaime858 (11:56:45 PM): yeah yeah yeah
TioJaime858 (11:56:58 PM): lazy-ass democrud president
TioJaime858 (11:57:10 PM): ooh yeah WW III w/ensign ro
TioJaime858 (11:57:18 PM): do the dew, george-dude!
TioJaime858 (11:57:47 PM): that's probalby because his son doesn't fuck shit up like kim
TioJaime858 (11:58:11 PM): george, you're a bad-ass, dude
TioJaime858 (11:58:30 PM): that wouldsuck if jack pulled the bomb out w/him
TioJaime858 (11:58:32 PM): d'oh
TioJaime858 (11:58:51 PM): do the dew george
TioJaime858 (11:59:19 PM): oh shit yeah i wanna take a look!
TioJaime858 (11:59:40 PM): george-man!
TioJaime858 (12:00:13 AM): aww yeah jack w/the flare-action!
TioJaime858 (12:00:50 AM): ooh shit yeah
TioJaime858 (12:01:01 AM): yeah bad idea to watch the explosion
TioJaime858 (12:01:11 AM): holy shit
TioJaime858 (12:01:35 AM): mushroom cloud-suppers!
TioJaime858 (12:01:40 AM): 11:00:00
TioJaime858 (12:02:13 AM): well, this can be the first new post on Tio Jaime: Aleph One
TioJaime858 has left the chat room.

Public - 1:26 PM

2005-06-08T13:26:00.000-07:00

Eff you xanga! I got your "518 days since i joined xanga" right here! And eff you and your "that's a big number" too.

We're moving to blogspot. Eventually.

Tio Jaime Nation is moving the archive to the Blogspot Province. Check out the archive as it's being converted by hand, oh-so-diligently, at it's new home: http://tjalephone.blogspot.com

Related post here at the SHoP.

And by the time the Blogspot Province catches up to this post, hopefully it'll be fully functional too. Eh. Whatevs.

And for those of you who are completely new and obviously clueless, check out the SixHertz House of Pain where I've been contributing quite regularly. At least more regularly than any of the other contributors. Not that it's hard. I practically have to get uber-pissed at SixH to get him to post on his own blog.enough for now. i've given you quite a few links that should keep you busy for a while

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

Public - 10:42 PM

2005-05-23T22:42:00.000-07:00

I'm mirroring this post here. Better to have and not need than need and not have...

NOT TOO TIRED TO BLOG, BABY BOOYAH

I got home at 945pm. left the apartment at 5am. I hope i'm doing the math right, because i count 16-1/2 hours. I think.

I'm too tired to complain, so here's the rundown. If a gentle SHoPper would be so kind as to maps.yahoo.com these to find the distance i travelled today, i'd be much obgliged.

Piedmont Ave., Oakland, CA to UC Merced (I-580E to I-205 to I-5N to CA-120 to US-99)
UC Merced to San Jose, CA (via 152 aka Pacheco Pass)
San Jose, CA to Milpitas, CA (via I-680)
Milpitas, CA to the Home Office in lovely Benicia, CA
Benicia, CA to sweet sweet Oakland, CA

That seems like a lot. If i wasn't so eff-ing tired, I'd do a cool deallie like this.

Instead, since it only requires a couple of command-F replace deallies in MS word for Mac OS X and a few html tags, i'll leave you w/a chat deallie... jimmy-tastic link below, but provided by SixH.

What a great friend!!! I just wish i weren't too exhausted to enjoy the photos.

chat deallie
9:45 PM
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: yo
SixHertz: yo yo [RACIAL EXPLETIVE]!
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: holy fuck my shit i just got home
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: left the house @ 5am
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: hey you have that girls peeing link again? you sent it to my work thing and i closed it
9:50 PM
SixHertz: http://fotzo.blogspot.com/2005/05/pipi.html
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: why do i like this so much?
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: there is a God
SixHertz: figured you'd like it.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: god there's a ton of them
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: i'm soo fucking tired, i can't even go through all of them
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: that's how tired i am right now
SixHertz: wow
SixHertz: no zoo for you
9:55 PM
SixHertz: no soup for you
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: huh?
SixHertz: nvm
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: i'm too tired to fend off your judgmentalism
SixHertz: I'm not being judgemental, dude.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: s'OK
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: even if you were, i'm too tired anway
SixHertz: I was cracking a joke related to Sienfeld.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: anyway
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: i don't watch that Jew show
SixHertz: you're too tired for the zoo.
SixHertz: neither do I.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: BUT I'M NOT TO TIRED TO BLOG, BABY
SixHertz: but it's a famous line from it.
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: BOOYAH
SixHertz: "No soup for you"
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: oh yeah
JihadJimmyMWCCDF: duh

chat deallie
9:45 PM JihadJimmyMWCCDF: yo SixHertz: yo yo [RACIAL EXPLETIVE]! JihadJimmyMWCCDF: holy fuck my shit i just got home JihadJimmyMWCCDF: left the house @ 5am JihadJimmyMWCCDF: hey you have that girls peeing link again? you sent it to my work thing and i closed it 9:50 PM SixHertz: http://fotzo.blogspot.com/2005/05/pipi.html JihadJimmyMWCCDF: why do i like this so much? JihadJimmyMWCCDF: there is a God SixHertz: figured you'd like it. JihadJimmyMWCCDF: god there's a ton of them JihadJimmyMWCCDF: i'm soo fucking tired, i can't even go through all of them JihadJimmyMWCCDF: that's how tired i am right now SixHertz: wow SixHertz: no zoo for you 9:55 PM SixHertz: no soup for you JihadJimmyMWCCDF: huh? SixHertz: nvm JihadJimmyMWCCDF: i'm too tired to fend off your judgmentalism SixHertz: I'm not being judgemental, dude. JihadJimmyMWCCDF: s'OK JihadJimmyMWCCDF: even if you were, i'm too tired anway SixHertz: I was cracking a joke related to Sienfeld. JihadJimmyMWCCDF: anyway JihadJimmyMWCCDF: i don't watch that Jew show SixHertz: you're too tired for the zoo. SixHertz: neither do I. JihadJimmyMWCCDF: BUT I'M NOT TO TIRED TO BLOG, BABY SixHertz: but it's a famous line from it. JihadJimmyMWCCDF: BOOYAH SixHertz: "No soup for you" JihadJimmyMWCCDF: oh yeah JihadJimmyMWCCDF: duh

On a related note, SixH's Jewish friend doesn't piss me off because he doesn't play the Neurotic Jew card. The Disgruntled Jew card, on the other hand, is by far more entertaining and never gets old. This is worth its weight in free ham.

Neurotic Jew: Woody Allen, Jerry Seinfeld.
Disgruntled Jew: Adam Sandler, SixH's friend, that kid from South Park, Krusty the Klown.

See? My hate is not w/o reason. it is surprisingly thought out and logical.

goodnight,
Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

Public - 4:48 PM

2005-05-18T16:48:00.000-07:00

JihadJimmyCDF (4:26:22 PM): yo
SixH (4:26:31 PM): whatup
JihadJimmyCDF (4:26:49 PM): i'll let you put up vicetivus pics as you see fit
JihadJimmyCDF (4:27:04 PM): you should have a My First Vicetivus segment
SixH (4:27:21 PM): hah, okay
JihadJimmyCDF (4:27:23 PM): since you have parents and a GF w/access to the blog
JihadJimmyCDF (4:27:42 PM): random jimmy-ness and chatting is one thing, but Vicetivus is another altogether
SixH (4:27:51 PM): roger that.
JihadJimmyCDF (4:27:58 PM): you have access to the album right?
JihadJimmyCDF (4:28:08 PM): case-sensitive, in case you're running into trouble
JihadJimmyCDF (4:29:08 PM): DAMMIT I MISS LAS VEGAS
SixH (4:29:24 PM): yeah, I've got it covered.
JihadJimmyCDF (4:29:33 PM): i wanna go back now.
JihadJimmyCDF (4:29:36 PM): right eff-ing now
SixH (4:30:06 PM): i have no desire to lose any additional cash.
JihadJimmyCDF (4:30:16 PM): yeah i figured you'd say something like that
JihadJimmyCDF (4:30:42 PM): you really shouldn't go to vegas with the mindset of making money
SixH (4:31:29 PM): yeah, yeah, yeah. Suck my cock.
SixH (4:31:31 PM): ;)
JihadJimmyCDF (4:31:44 PM): no look, you goddam rookie
JihadJimmyCDF (4:32:00 PM): i'm right, and you know it
SixH (4:32:12 PM): I gots a couple words for ya.
SixH (4:32:16 PM): Who gives a shit?
SixH (4:32:18 PM): :D
JihadJimmyCDF (4:32:28 PM): hey you're the one bellyaching about losing money in vegas
SixH (4:32:41 PM): Hey, I can bitch about it, can't I?
SixH (4:32:50 PM): I'm not going to dwell.
JihadJimmyCDF (4:33:01 PM): sure you can bitch
JihadJimmyCDF (4:33:15 PM): but i'm just telling you that this is standard operating procedure
SixH (4:34:28 PM): Yeah, I know.
SixH (4:34:34 PM): Not like I expected to win.
SixH (4:34:38 PM): shit, dude, what do you want from me?
SixH (4:34:43 PM): I'm vegas'd out.
SixH (4:34:46 PM): http://www.voanews.com/english/2005-05-17-voa66.cfm
JihadJimmyCDF (4:34:55 PM): no that's my point, you should never expect to win
SixH (4:35:03 PM): nor did i, goddammit.
SixH (4:35:07 PM): just drop the fucking thing.
JihadJimmyCDF (4:36:16 PM): re: that article....
JihadJimmyCDF (4:36:19 PM): Well, no shit.
JihadJimmyCDF (4:36:25 PM): What have we got here, a fucking comedian.
JihadJimmyCDF (4:36:27 PM): Private Joker.
SixH (4:36:32 PM): haha
JihadJimmyCDF (4:36:38 PM): Hell, I like you, you can come voer to my house and fuck my sister!
JihadJimmyCDF (4:36:46 PM): **punches joker in the stomach**
SixH (4:36:54 PM): YOU LITTLE SCUMBAG!
JihadJimmyCDF (4:36:58 PM): You little scumbag! I got your name, I got your ass!
SixH (4:36:59 PM): I GOT YOUR NAME!
SixH (4:37:01 PM): I GOT YOUR ASS!
JihadJimmyCDF (4:37:04 PM): YOU WILL NOT LAUGH
JihadJimmyCDF (4:37:06 PM): YOU WILL NOT CRY
JihadJimmyCDF (4:37:15 PM): YOU WILL LEARN BY THE NUMBERS, I WILL TEACH YOU