Tio Jaime: Aleph One

One more before I go to bed...

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

3am criticism of 24 season 2, 11pm - 12am
ooh baby the bomb just went off

You are now in chat room “BiteMeAIM.” TioJaime858 has entered the chat room. TioJaime858 (12:16:49 AM): hello dere TioJaime858 (12:17:07 AM): and WTF, i can have Bite Me AiM as a chat room name, but not 24seas211pm? TioJaime858 (12:17:12 AM): dumbfucks TioJaime858 (12:17:28 AM): here we go TioJaime858 (12:17:36 AM): PREVIOUSLY ON 24 TioJaime858 (12:17:45 AM): PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER TioJaime858 (12:18:04 AM): TONY ALMEIDA TioJaime858 (12:18:14 AM): that's the first time i've seen tony on the opening sequence TioJaime858 (12:18:24 AM): i hope i've been spelling it right so far TioJaime858 (12:18:27 AM): KIM BAUER TioJaime858 (12:18:37 AM): ! TioJaime858 (12:18:40 AM): JACK BAUER! TioJaime858 (12:18:56 AM): did george mason say "parachute" last episode?" TioJaime858 (12:19:15 AM): THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 11:00 PM AND 12:00 AM TioJaime858 (12:19:29 AM): wow nice graphic of the mushroom cloud TioJaime858 (12:19:48 AM): why would there be a shadow from the mushroom cloud? TioJaime858 (12:20:20 AM): it's pronounced nu-cular! TioJaime858 (12:20:34 AM): well OK then! TioJaime858 (12:20:38 AM): pep talk over! TioJaime858 (12:20:40 AM): no more bomb! TioJaime858 (12:20:51 AM): and yet we're still here TioJaime858 (12:20:57 AM): i'm still 3am Criticizing TioJaime858 (12:21:00 AM): and you're still reading TioJaime858 (12:21:18 AM): and kim's still crying TioJaime858 (12:21:24 AM): which is a nice respite from her fucking shit up TioJaime858 (12:21:34 AM): jack flaring again! TioJaime858 (12:21:53 AM): CTU chopper! TioJaime858 (12:22:00 AM): "whose chopper is this?" TioJaime858 (12:23:19 AM): nice job CTU TioJaime858 (12:23:40 AM): dude, the foreign national is standing right there TioJaime858 (12:24:55 AM): ha ha terrorist bitch-ass TioJaime858 (12:25:07 AM): andnow ann-chick is interrogating you TioJaime858 (12:25:08 AM): ha ha TioJaime858 (12:25:27 AM): eh, just torture the fucker TioJaime858 (12:25:38 AM): ooh yeah guantanamo TioJaime858 (12:25:57 AM): hmm TioJaime858 (12:26:08 AM): sayed ali is denying the meeting took place TioJaime858 (12:26:30 AM): ooh hi ann-chick TioJaime858 (12:26:35 AM): i wanna lick her face TioJaime858 (12:26:55 AM): and now it's getting stickier TioJaime858 (12:27:21 AM): ooh yeah audio analysizing TioJaime858 (12:28:07 AM): black dude says there's no doubt that the recording is authentic TioJaime858 (12:28:15 AM): ann-chick in the meeting TioJaime858 (12:29:04 AM): ooh TioJaime858 (12:29:13 AM): "your experience as an interrogator is limited" TioJaime858 (12:29:47 AM): meanwhile, aboard Air Force One... TioJaime858 (12:30:03 AM): get over it, president dude TioJaime858 (12:30:14 AM): oh! it wasn't bauer TioJaime858 (12:31:03 AM): and the president getting the report confirming the Cypress recordings TioJaime858 (12:31:16 AM): yeah no shit you don't have the option of not responding TioJaime858 (12:31:41 AM): ooh yeah TioJaime858 (12:31:49 AM): emergency session of congress 11:14:07 TioJaime858 (12:31:53 AM): 11:18:18 TioJaime858 (12:32:03 AM): during which he'll ask for a formal declaration of war TioJaime858 (12:32:06 AM): ooh ann chick TioJaime858 (12:32:22 AM): bitch-fest? TioJaime858 (12:33:13 AM): 8-10 weeks for full-scale invasion TioJaime858 (12:33:17 AM): rolling start TioJaime858 (12:33:18 AM): ooh yeah TioJaime858 (12:33:32 AM): ooh yeah TioJaime858 (12:33:38 AM): surgical strikes starting in 6 hours TioJaime858 (12:34:04 AM): deputy prime minister calling for the president TioJaime858 (12:34:14 AM): oh just invade his shit TioJaime858 (12:35:16 AM): deputy prime minister trying to blow smoke up the POTUS's ass... la la la TioJaime858 (12:35:22 AM): "please don't bomb our shit" TioJaime858 (12:35:37 AM): "you'll hear from us soon" TioJaime858 (12:35:43 AM): oh yes motherfuckers TioJaime858 (12:35:49 AM): they're transferring sayed ali TioJaime858 (12:35:55 AM): and here's where teh shit gets fucked up TioJaime858 (12:36:05 AM): oh yeah, still pissed about your son? TioJaime858 (12:36:22 AM): San Jose Sheriff's dept! TioJaime858 (12:36:38 AM): didn't know we had a sheriff TioJaime858 (12:36:44 AM): since it's Santa Clara County TioJaime858 (12:36:52 AM): jack leaving CTU... TioJaime858 (12:36:59 AM): or is he? TioJaime858 (12:37:03 AM): making a phone call first TioJaime858 (12:37:26 AM): WTF? TioJaime858 (12:37:31 AM): not sure what's happening... TioJaime858 (12:37:38 AM): ann-chick looking kinda suspicious TioJaime858 (12:38:02 AM): ann-chick voicing concerns about recording TioJaime858 (12:38:04 AM): ooh hi boobs TioJaime858 (12:38:20 AM): boobs! TioJaime858 (12:38:31 AM): i wanna make out w/ann-chick TioJaime858 (12:38:35 AM): and ann herself TioJaime858 (12:39:05 AM): yeah eff you terrorist TioJaime858 (12:39:45 AM): should've killed his kids anyway TioJaime858 (12:39:46 AM): oops TioJaime858 (12:39:52 AM): sayed ali was shot TioJaime858 (12:40:08 AM): 11:26:57 TioJaime858 (12:40:13 AM): 11:31:09 TioJaime858 (12:40:32 AM): hmm, this complicates things TioJaime858 (12:40:53 AM): now jack thinks ali was telling the truth TioJaime858 (12:41:52 AM): ooh tony getting pissy TioJaime858 (12:42:13 AM): see, there's a reason this show isn't called The Tony Almeida Show TioJaime858 (12:42:16 AM): it's because jack is right TioJaime858 (12:42:22 AM): this should be good TioJaime858 (12:42:25 AM): yeah stupid kim TioJaime858 (12:42:29 AM): the store's closed TioJaime858 (12:42:42 AM): you still have your gun? TioJaime858 (12:42:56 AM): WTF? TioJaime858 (12:43:00 AM): kim you tard TioJaime858 (12:43:18 AM): you stupid tard of a chick TioJaime858 (12:43:23 AM): he's gonna get shot TioJaime858 (12:43:56 AM): 10-30k american casualties TioJaime858 (12:44:22 AM): phone call for the president TioJaime858 (12:44:25 AM): it's jack bauer TioJaime858 (12:44:40 AM): but it's important enough to interrupt TioJaime858 (12:45:43 AM): yeah sayed ali was assassinated TioJaime858 (12:45:57 AM): blah blah blah don't wanna take military action based on erroneous information TioJaime858 (12:46:06 AM): ha ha jab at bush ha ha TioJaime858 (12:46:11 AM): 11:37:16 TioJaime858 (12:46:15 AM): 11:41:28 TioJaime858 (12:46:33 AM): "This is Dessler" TioJaime858 (12:47:07 AM): Usef Auda TioJaime858 (12:47:11 AM): not usef audi TioJaime858 (12:47:18 AM): ooh kate warner! TioJaime858 (12:47:30 AM): ooh yeah momma TioJaime858 (12:47:34 AM): "it's a long story" TioJaime858 (12:48:05 AM): agent gooker is gonna debrief her TioJaime858 (12:48:13 AM): meanwhile, aboard Air Force One... TioJaime858 (12:49:09 AM): "telephone conversation w/jack bauer keeps replaying in my head" TioJaime858 (12:49:19 AM): liability-licious TioJaime858 (12:49:29 AM): oh stop speaking so presidential TioJaime858 (12:49:36 AM): "everyone except jack bauer" TioJaime858 (12:49:44 AM): yeah that sounds very leader-riffic TioJaime858 (12:50:11 AM): was mike cry8ing? TioJaime858 (12:50:25 AM): crying TioJaime858 (12:50:31 AM): there was a tear moving down his left cheek TioJaime858 (12:50:57 AM): yeah fuck you foreigner TioJaime858 (12:51:52 AM): hey, maybe the prevention of your arab country getting all blow'd up is worth something TioJaime858 (12:52:10 AM): somebody planted evidence to frame ali TioJaime858 (12:52:20 AM): and he's talking to jack TioJaime858 (12:52:30 AM): meridian and moorpark! TioJaime858 (12:52:40 AM): this dude wants marie warner TioJaime858 (12:52:55 AM): and oh yes, it was the missing commando! TioJaime858 (12:52:57 AM): damn i'm good TioJaime858 (12:52:59 AM): 11:48 TioJaime858 (12:53:00 AM): something TioJaime858 (12:53:02 AM): 11:52:30 TioJaime858 (12:53:11 AM): ooh kim yeah TioJaime858 (12:53:25 AM): Touch it. TioJaime858 (12:53:36 AM): uh oh TioJaime858 (12:53:54 AM): you dumbfuck TioJaime858 (12:54:10 AM): ooh yeah get some guns TioJaime858 (12:54:15 AM): oh he's just calling the cops TioJaime858 (12:54:27 AM): Soledad Canyon road off route 14! TioJaime858 (12:54:31 AM): oh he's gonna die TioJaime858 (12:54:48 AM): uh oh TioJaime858 (12:55:01 AM): oh this isn't gonna end well TioJaime858 (12:55:05 AM): NO DON'T GET YOUR GUN YOU TARD TioJaime858 (12:55:27 AM): OH JUST SHOOT HIM TioJaime858 (12:55:59 AM): and now he's getting bread TioJaime858 (12:56:04 AM): kinda like that aerosmith video TioJaime858 (12:56:13 AM): should've shot him TioJaime858 (12:56:23 AM): "you're gonna have to trust me" TioJaime858 (12:56:26 AM): ooh ann-chick TioJaime858 (12:56:42 AM): WTF is he paying for it? TioJaime858 (12:56:52 AM): yeah you're not a criminal TioJaime858 (12:56:54 AM): you tard TioJaime858 (12:57:16 AM): Palmdale! TioJaime858 (12:57:22 AM): oh shit TioJaime858 (12:57:26 AM): Ok we're fucked TioJaime858 (12:57:33 AM): i mean *you're* fucked TioJaime858 (12:57:39 AM): oh crazy mesxidude TioJaime858 (12:57:41 AM): oops TioJaime858 (12:57:56 AM): stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid kim TioJaime858 (12:57:59 AM): STUPID KIM TioJaime858 (12:58:03 AM): dammit TioJaime858 (12:58:11 AM): ooh ann-chick TioJaime858 (12:58:19 AM): need you some humpage, perhaps? TioJaime858 (12:58:56 AM): wait, did the dude want kate or marie warner? TioJaime858 (12:59:00 AM): maybe it was kate TioJaime858 (12:59:09 AM): ooh janky mulatto chick TioJaime858 (12:59:11 AM): mulatta TioJaime858 (12:59:40 AM): thought kim was being held hostage TioJaime858 (12:59:56 AM): ooh tony TioJaime858 (1:00:02 AM): i mean, whoa tony TioJaime858 (1:00:30 AM): another instance of jack not being able to tell anybody anything TioJaime858 (1:00:34 AM): and now he just hit tony TioJaime858 (1:00:36 AM): 12:00:00 TioJaime858 (1:00:43 AM): fucking sweet! TioJaime858 (1:01:15 AM): yeahnice visual effects, Fuzzy Logic TioJaime858 (1:02:00 AM): only 8 more episodes to go? maybe 7 TioJaime858 (1:02:02 AM): but it's late TioJaime858 (1:02:06 AM): OK goodnight kids TioJaime858 has left the chat room.