Tio Jaime: Aleph One

Ok. Quote for the post title has nothing to do with 24. But it should illustrate the difference between a 3amC and a regular recap. The focus isn't so much the show, but the jimmy thought process.

Jihad Jimmy, Minister of War Crimes and Chief Defender of the Faith

3am Criticism of 24 Season Two, 4am - 5am

You are now in chat room “bitemeaim.” TioJaime858 has entered the chat room. TioJaime858 (6:25:15 PM): hello dere TioJaime858 (6:25:24 PM): and WTF did AIM miss a line last time? TioJaime858 (6:25:43 PM): DAMMIT I ALREADY PUT MY DVD AWAY TioJaime858 (6:25:47 PM): GOTTA TAKE IT OUT AGAIN TioJaime858 (6:25:54 PM): FUCK EM, THEY OWE ME A RIDE TO THE THEATER TONIGHT TioJaime858 (6:26:50 PM): you fuckers TioJaime858 (6:26:57 PM): stupid apple dvd player TioJaime858 (6:28:33 PM): coulda been halfway through the fucking episode by now if it wasn't for my friends TioJaime858 (6:28:36 PM): PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER TioJaime858 (6:28:50 PM): VICE PRESIDENT JIM PRESCOTT!!! TioJaime858 (6:29:02 PM): KIM BAUER!!! TioJaime858 (6:29:11 PM): ooh yeah KIM BAUER TioJaime858 (6:29:16 PM): TONY ALMEIDA TioJaime858 (6:29:37 PM): JACK BAUER, YOU BITCHES TioJaime858 (6:29:56 PM): THE FOLLOWING TAKES PLACE BETWEEN 4:00 AM AND 5:00 AM TioJaime858 (6:30:28 PM): i like how they put the dumb guy in a trucker hat TioJaime858 (6:31:30 PM): he's going all barefoot john mcclain style TioJaime858 (6:31:42 PM): yippie-kay-yay motherfuckers TioJaime858 (6:31:55 PM): bombers awaiting refueling TioJaime858 (6:32:04 PM): ooh president to the conference room TioJaime858 (6:32:30 PM): oh you are the president of the united states TioJaime858 (6:32:46 PM): there's probably only a number of times you can pull that card on somebody on your own staff TioJaime858 (6:33:04 PM): like, no shit, mr. president you're the POTUS TioJaime858 (6:33:08 PM): ya fucking think? TioJaime858 (6:33:14 PM): going to the conference room TioJaime858 (6:33:15 PM): ooh yeah TioJaime858 (6:33:40 PM): you were busy jim TioJaime858 (6:33:53 PM): ooh yeah this is a unique situation TioJaime858 (6:34:04 PM): kinda like Air Force One being hijacked TioJaime858 (6:34:11 PM): we are invoking the 25th amendment TioJaime858 (6:34:36 PM): section 4 TioJaime858 (6:35:02 PM): VP and majority of cabinet determine unable to discharge duties of office la la TioJaime858 (6:35:15 PM): didn't PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER watch Air Force One? TioJaime858 (6:35:43 PM): and, VICE PRESIDENT JIM PRESCOTT have you ever watched 24? ever heard of that jack bauer guy? TioJaime858 (6:35:51 PM): could've watched season 1 TioJaime858 (6:36:12 PM): instead of a shot of the video screen you could've showed the VICE PRESIDENT TioJaime858 (6:37:12 PM): gonna show a pattern of irrational behavior TioJaime858 (6:37:14 PM): ooh yeah TioJaime858 (6:37:26 PM): how is the camera following PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER TioJaime858 (6:38:15 PM): ooh serious questions raised TioJaime858 (6:39:05 PM): ooh yeah dueling politicians TioJaime858 (6:39:12 PM): yeah i wonder who's gonna win TioJaime858 (6:39:24 PM): yeah, probably not the best thing to say TioJaime858 (6:39:26 PM): 4:11:13 TioJaime858 (6:39:37 PM): 4:15:42 TioJaime858 (6:40:58 PM): oh lucky for JACK BAUER he has an adapter TioJaime858 (6:41:09 PM): heh, ran into some interference TioJaime858 (6:41:15 PM): ooh hi ann-chick TioJaime858 (6:41:32 PM): run a background check on Peter Kingsley TioJaime858 (6:42:00 PM): ooh yeah michelle are you ready for me TioJaime858 (6:42:04 PM): that sounds hot TioJaime858 (6:42:15 PM): LOL it's the reporter TioJaime858 (6:43:00 PM): ooh hustled into a room TioJaime858 (6:43:08 PM): oh eff the first amendment TioJaime858 (6:43:59 PM): well, the bill of rights is probably more important than lives TioJaime858 (6:44:07 PM): oh well, maybe not TioJaime858 (6:44:10 PM): eh who gives a fuck TioJaime858 (6:44:19 PM): la la la, legal precedent TioJaime858 (6:44:23 PM): ooh yeah testification TioJaime858 (6:44:42 PM): ooh yeah ann-chick TioJaime858 (6:44:55 PM): chip is damaged TioJaime858 (6:45:25 PM): KIM BAUER!!! TioJaime858 (6:45:41 PM): what? he'/s gonna let kim through? TioJaime858 (6:46:00 PM): KIM BAUER!!! TioJaime858 (6:46:09 PM): yay! TioJaime858 (6:46:18 PM): yay back to the matheson's house TioJaime858 (6:46:35 PM): OK enough of the social bullshit, grab a cot! TioJaime858 (6:46:56 PM): ooh elisha cuthbert mmm TioJaime858 (6:48:32 PM): yes we get it YOU'RE THE FUCKING PRESIDENT TioJaime858 (6:48:42 PM): you don't call me by my first name! TioJaime858 (6:48:44 PM): 4:24:49 TioJaime858 (6:48:54 PM): 4:29:15 TioJaime858 (6:49:08 PM): ooh yeah TioJaime858 (6:49:12 PM): who's this man TioJaime858 (6:49:16 PM): heh roger stanton TioJaime858 (6:49:40 PM): the dude who was tortured TioJaime858 (6:49:41 PM): heh TioJaime858 (6:49:43 PM): funny shit TioJaime858 (6:50:15 PM): arrived at the OC, had raeburn dismissed TioJaime858 (6:50:27 PM): well, yes it was true TioJaime858 (6:51:02 PM): i thought he did know more about the bomb TioJaime858 (6:51:48 PM): ooh yeah jack sent the data TioJaime858 (6:52:03 PM): ooh should take about 15 mins, ann-chick said TioJaime858 (6:52:16 PM): zap-suppers! TioJaime858 (6:52:24 PM): zap! TioJaime858 (6:52:27 PM): zap-zap! TioJaime858 (6:52:29 PM): heh TioJaime858 (6:52:53 PM): "we knew about the bomb weeks ago" TioJaime858 (6:53:44 PM): oops TioJaime858 (6:53:48 PM): no rest of the tape TioJaime858 (6:54:13 PM): well then how the hell did they find the bomb at norton airfield? TioJaime858 (6:54:47 PM): oops TioJaime858 (6:55:42 PM): yeah you know, i'm sold, i'd have to side w/PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER TioJaime858 (6:56:17 PM): ooh yeah analyze the evidence momma TioJaime858 (6:56:27 PM): perhaps some nude interludes w/ann-chick TioJaime858 (6:56:37 PM): oops audio files gone TioJaime858 (6:57:09 PM): LOL TioJaime858 (6:57:12 PM): 4:37:33 TioJaime858 (6:57:13 PM): oops TioJaime858 (6:57:14 PM): 32 TioJaime858 (6:57:17 PM): 4:37:32 TioJaime858 (6:57:21 PM): 4:42:00 TioJaime858 (6:57:33 PM): ooh yeah jack has shoes TioJaime858 (6:57:42 PM): kate warner!!! TioJaime858 (6:58:01 PM): eh, it's not really your fault TioJaime858 (6:58:15 PM): well, whatever TioJaime858 (6:59:13 PM): hey waste precious time w/some smoochy-smoochy TioJaime858 (6:59:51 PM): hax0r named alex hewitt! TioJaime858 (7:00:06 PM): the programmer who maybe made the recording TioJaime858 (7:00:11 PM): also in NORTH HOLLYWOOD!!! TioJaime858 (7:00:20 PM): ooh take her w/you or something TioJaime858 (7:00:28 PM): heh, her father is still @ CTU TioJaime858 (7:01:38 PM): well, things change because the show is called 24, VICE PRESIDENT JIM PRESCOTT TioJaime858 (7:03:39 PM): novick is pushing for the attack again TioJaime858 (7:03:59 PM): that's kinda retarded.... wouldn't you want to make sure first? TioJaime858 (7:04:29 PM): secretary of transportaion yes TioJaime858 (7:04:35 PM): secretary of treasure no TioJaime858 (7:04:39 PM): 4:49:18 TioJaime858 (7:04:47 PM): 4:53:43 TioJaime858 (7:05:09 PM): a caltech nerd TioJaime858 (7:05:19 PM): and now he went crazy TioJaime858 (7:05:20 PM): phone TioJaime858 (7:10:13 PM): ooh T is coming over and we're gonna hve ice cream TioJaime858 (7:10:24 PM): secretary of defense yes TioJaime858 (7:10:30 PM): and my DVD player is being shitty again TioJaime858 (7:10:32 PM): stupid apple TioJaime858 (7:10:46 PM): yeah you fucker because i was trying to change the region code TioJaime858 (7:10:48 PM): bitch TioJaime858 (7:11:13 PM): i swear apple's dvd player is so buggy TioJaime858 (7:11:46 PM): ANGER TioJaime858 (7:12:05 PM): FUCK YOU APPLE DVD PLAYER TioJaime858 (7:12:12 PM): WHY ARE YOU AN UNBEARABLE PIECE OF SHIT? TioJaime858 (7:12:37 PM): STUPID ASSHOLE TioJaime858 (7:13:34 PM): OK gonna save this 3amC because my entire computer is taking a shit right now TioJaime858 (7:13:37 PM): hopefullyi didn't lose it TioJaime858 (7:14:29 PM): wow, wonderful work apple TioJaime858 (7:14:55 PM): because really, who would want to do something like pause a DVD? TioJaime858 (7:15:27 PM): Scene selection TioJaime858 (7:15:41 PM): The Deciding Vote TioJaime858 (7:15:46 PM): Secretary of Defense Yes TioJaime858 (7:16:03 PM): Secretary of Agriculture... TioJaime858 (7:16:06 PM): ... no TioJaime858 (7:16:14 PM): 7 - 6 TioJaime858 (7:16:20 PM): Secretary of Interior... TioJaime858 (7:16:25 PM): No TioJaime858 (7:16:29 PM): 7-all! TioJaime858 (7:16:42 PM): Seretary of State... deciding vote! TioJaime858 (7:16:57 PM): yeah just vote already you pigfucker TioJaime858 (7:17:27 PM): hmm, what part of we might not need to go to war don't you pigfuckers understand? TioJaime858 (7:17:40 PM): lucky for us little brains in the audience, we know that JACK BAUER will prevail TioJaime858 (7:18:28 PM): whoa, they're taking PRESIDENT DAVID PALMER AWAY TioJaime858 (7:19:29 PM): the president should try to over power the marines TioJaime858 (7:19:52 PM): well, PLACE BETS NOW TioJaime858 (7:19:55 PM): is the programmer dead? TioJaime858 (7:19:59 PM): or a chick? TioJaime858 (7:20:04 PM): uh oh TioJaime858 (7:20:15 PM): probably not a chick TioJaime858 (7:20:31 PM): VICE PRESIDENT JIM PRESCOTT BEING SWORN IN TioJaime858 (7:20:44 PM): yeah nice job w/the spoiler there you pigfuckers TioJaime858 (7:20:46 PM): KIM BAUER TioJaime858 (7:21:03 PM): maybe DAVID PALMER should pullan ensign ro and set shit on fire TioJaime858 (7:21:14 PM): uh oh, bad shit coming up to the loft TioJaime858 (7:21:23 PM): JACK BAUER HIDING TioJaime858 (7:21:27 PM): a glock! TioJaime858 (7:21:46 PM): that was a long 2 minutes TioJaime858 (7:21:49 PM): 5:00:00 TioJaime858 (7:21:59 PM): whoa NOSFERATU CHICK!!! TioJaime858 has left the chat room.