Tio Jaime: Aleph One

Another one of these weird fucknut things...

what is you inner self like by true_poetry
username
your inner model is:
your eating disorder is:	bulimia
what you most desire is:	To be thin.
what you crave most is:
you will die on:	March 23, 2025
you will die from:	drug overdose
Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!

***OK looks like i got a bit carried away when commenting on somebody else's blog... sorry erin***

(original post is here)

This is the first monday I can remember when my Giants have the day off, but my Mariners are getting spanked @ Safeco...

ThunderSpirit: Nothing's wrong with bashing and boycotting michael moore w/o seeing his "movie" first because he is consistently saying stupid and irresponsible things. I hope you don't think people are smarter and better off for trying to sit through one of his egotistical mental-m@sturbation-fests just to be "well-rounded". Or God, even "in the interests of *diversity*."

The difference between Bush II and Clinton is that Bush II didn't use the military for political purposes. Bill Clinton was always one to use the military: 1) to try to prove he wasn't a cowering pansy when it came to standing up to our enemies overseas with his horrendous foreign policy, or 2) to distract us from his scandal and deceit at home. Why did Bush go into Afghanistan and Iraq? The answer lies in his simplicity that you liberals are so quick to mock: he is single-minded-- in his goal of protecting Americans at that haven which they call home.

I'd much rather have a president concentrating solely on that rather than building his legacy.

To clarify some of your points:
- Janet Reno nixed the plan to catch bin Laden (http://abcnews.go.com/sections/GMA/World/GMA030521Bin_laden_plan.html)
- Clinton's bombing of Iraq (not necessarily al Qaeda strongholds) was all part of a carefully orchestrated media blitz designed to make the gullible American public forget about his indiscretions (see also: Buddy the Dog, the supposedly candid picture of Bill & Hill dancing on the beach)

Whew. I haven't written anything that Republican in a long time. My friends were afraid that I'd forgotten...

TheAllies: I like your site, and hope to check it out some other time when i'm not about to go to sleep... However, your conservatism is offset by your choice in baseball "teams". The D-backs and Angels were both flukes, neither of whom deserved their championships. Arizona was a team of obsucre mediocrity with exception of Johnson and Schilling. And maybe Gonzo-- actually i like that guy and don't boo him when he comes to Pac Bell. Anahym was just lucky enough to get hot when everybody and most importantly the Giants got cold. Look what happened to the d-backs and angels the years after they won their championships...

2002: d-backs win their division, but are only 43-33 against their NL West (and lately, the weakest division) division-mates, versus the Giants' 47-29. Eliminated in the first round by the Cardinals.

2003: A year after winning the world series, the Angels, who lost not a single starter from their championship run, end up 8 games below .500 and *19* behind AL West champion A's.

(in comparison, in 2003: the giants, after losing the world series and losing Russ Ortiz, Jeff Kent, David Bell, and longtime manager Dusty Baker (i forgot who else) take the NL West wire-to-wire and win 100
games)

Erin: sorry to have used your comments for such a long response. Please feel free to come to jimmy-land and rock the boat w/my friends. But take solace in the fact that your Republicanism is not going unnoticed.

tio jimmy

To commemorate Devon (U - Jimmy)'s feat of surpassing JL legend Grace (Ret. UE - James), a 5-shot set of Fernet Branca toasts has been issued...

DEVON
EDEN (Devon's daughter)
DEVON (Grace's daughter)
PEPPER
GRACE

I don't remember the Madeline toast, and in fact 'Trose may have snuck that one in there when i was drunky-drunky (****CORRECTION:  T has recanted Madeline and recalled the PEPPER toast.  Shit, I must've been drunk****)

What the FUCK is up with these stupidass kids nowadays???  They mean to say shit and fuck and asshole and bitch and cock, BUT THEY CAN'T BRING THEMSELVES TO SAY IT!!!

they have to say the nice alternatives like sh*t and f*ck and a**hole and b*tch and c*ck.  holy sheep shit that's the stupidest thing i've ever fucking heard of

When I'm thinking "shit" i'll type "shit".  When I'm thinking "fuck-tard" I'll write "fuck-tard"

WHEN I'M THINKING "DUDE I WANNA HAVE LOTS OF SEX WITH LINDSEY LOHAN" I'LL FUCKING WRITE "DUDE I WANNA HAVE LOTS OF SEX WITH LINDSEY LOHAN" since i didn't write it, i wasn't thinking it.  I was talking about a simple spanking, holy jesus, where the fuck do they find these stupid kids?!?

If ever I think, "i wanna double team lindsey lohan with my favorite stripper Chenelle who's wearing a big purple dildo on her cute little forehead while her daughter Victoria watches" then goddam i'm gonna tell you point blank that "i wanna double team lindsey lohan with my favorite stripper Chenelle who's wearing a big purple dildo on her cute little forhead while her daughter Victoria watches"

holy shit you kids are fucking stupid.  and for the record, i would like to be raped hard and repeatedly by lindsey lohan.  While Michelle Branch watches. 

I sincerely hope this clears up any confusion or misconceptions that may have arisen from my previous posts and comments. 

-TJ

In light of the apparent armistice, I will comment on this little asian chicks blog here, and not on her blog.  I'm keeping it real, for the record. 

Stop the hate, baby.  Stop the hate and increase the peace.

(***snickers and chuckles from TJ's bellicose and warmongering brethren***)

her post...

http://www.xanga.com/item.aspx?user=xodivaxo05&tab=weblogs&uid=101851486

my response...

i liked the original 70's freaky friday better with Jodie Foster

And ooh, lindsey lohan!!  I just watched Mean Girls, and man oh man, I want to be spanked HARD by lindsey lohan and her two friends.  bam.

JURY DUTY!!! =(

Here's the letter I wrote. Bear in mind that not only am I an engineer, but I am construction as well...

*****
May 25, 2004

Superior Court of California
County of Alameda
Wiley W. Manuel Courthouse
661 Washington Street, 3rd Floor Room 360
Oakland, CA 94607-3922


Subject: Jury Duty for James [last name deleted]


To Whom It May Concern:

I am writing to request that James [last name deleted] be excused from jury duty.

As the sole Project Engineer on my construction project, he is essential and integral to the day-to-day operations of my project here in Santa Clara. We are unable to replace him with another engineer as his knowledge of and familiarity with the project to date cannot be duplicated.

As is always the case, time is of the essence on construction undertakings of this magnitude. Mr. [last name deleted]'s absence will prolong an already delayed schedule, which in turn could result in liquidated damages.


Sincerely,
R. Ashley Carter, EIT
Underground Construction Co., Inc.
Project Manager


Cc: Correspondence File
Job File
*****

i'm guessing that you aren't commenting on my shit right now because YOU'RE ALL ASLEEP

this is good, i'llt akl to you in the morning

if your name starts with an S and ends in a "ixHertz" i hope your shit wnet OK today... thanks for the golf, BTW

OK going to bed

love you all, especially laker lisa who is HOLY GODDAM ONE FINE-ASS ORANGE COUNTY MOMMA

goodnight googdnight goodnight
TJ

THERE'S A KNIFE IN MY BOOTS, WHY IS THIS?

+GOODNIGHT,.
TIOJAIME

OK kinda drunk, buit i'm told that these make the best kinds of posts...

saw camille toniht @ showgirls... holy kick me in the balls she's a cutie! and her BF was theretonight, andwhen i wantedto say goodbye, another waitress calledout to her "HEY CAMILL,E YOUR FRIEND WANTS TO SAY GOODBYE" but i think she was talking to her BF right then and there... that's not good as he was wearing a raiders jersey.

fucking pussy, everybody knows that norcal is 49ersterritory

you can't tell, but i'm drunk, and blogging because there really isn't anything else to do righ now

except for slep, i'm sure i'll mayke my way over to your sleep studey

WTF did i jus trty t o eyp when i was lahfl asleep?

oh crap i ca tell that the tagalog is rapidly eterioratingdsaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

hmm, i'm falling asleep @ my computer with a toothbrush in my mouthllllllllllww

shit i fell asleep again

LakerLisa: you're HOT!!! post morepics ofyouserself wheneer you get a chanceddddddddssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssllllllllllllllllllllllll;

shit i'm tired

oh, not sure if i mentionedt his already but i'm drunk

Ooh, so Crap-On-Your-Bed Girl's replacement is a full-on scorchcake!!! She's half-filipina, named Camille. Her name can either be Crap-On-Your-Bed Girl Extreme (as i believe she fucked up our order once) or No Ice Girl, as she brings us our backs w/o ice.

I think my parents would be pleased if I found a half-filipina instead of a white trashy Hayward-chick who dates mexican dudes who are on the management track @ Home Depot.

(For those of you scoring the game @ home, that is not a reference to Home Depot Girl. Who, incidentally, is mexican)

and to kick off the weekend, I'd like to salute my crew without whom any of this would be possible. OK that's not true, as there are tons of mexi-dudes who would jump at the chance to replace my crew on the Underground payrolls...

Foreman Jose "Chica" Lopez-Ceja (or ceja-lopez, depending on who you ask)
Laborer Jaime "Chicharra" Gonzalez
Laborer Aldo "Papusa" Abarca
Operator Jeff Howell (token black dude)

I bought them ice cream today. The ice cream mexi-dude was passing by our jobsite just as they were getting out of the pit, so i bought them some. Aren't I a good engineer?

it appears as if i'm ensconced in a xanga-war!

this was left in my comments by some asian chick... undoubtedly, she's one of those who can't write words out like "fuck" or "shit" or "pussy"

>hmm .. maybe that's why that "depot girl" wasn't there.
>she was probably scared of your ugly face so she decided
>not to come.

visit this little spiteful witch here!

hey hey hey, chill out, little asian sister!

What we got here is a fine specimen of Pure Alabama Blacksn-- whoa there, cowboy!

Umm, Home Depot Girl wasn't there for pretty much the same reason Crap-On-Your-Bed Girl moved to Sacramento.... because God has a sick sense of humor and He wants me to end up married to some dumb asian chick like you.

in a bit, i'll post some of me and brent just chatting it up like a couple of little schoolgirls...

I have arranged the following e-mails so they flow chronologically. It is rare that I will sacrifice authenticity in the name of convenience, so please enjoy it while it lasts.

Oh, and for reference, the only women I will live with are my mom and whomever it is I end up marrying. Ideally Michelle Branch.

Oh, and also for reference, I'm either looking for a roommate (1 BR in a 2BR apt in the nice part of oakland), or will be moving to san jose a/o santa clara. My roommate lincoln is starting a new position over on the peninsula...

> >> -----Original Message-----
> >> From: Brent [last name BALEETED][mailto:SPAM-GINA@mac.com]
> >> Sent: Monday, June 14, 2004 10:09 AM
> >> To: James [last name deleted]
> >> Subject: Question
> >>
> >>
> >> James,
> >>
> >> What are a couple characteristics that you would require for
> >> a potential roommate to possess?
> >>
> >> Sincerely yours,
> >> Brent
> >>
> >> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >> "Telling us to obey instinct is like telling us to obey
> >> 'people.' People say different things: so do instincts. Our
> >> instincts are at war.... Each instinct, if you listen to it,
> >> will claim to be gratified at the expense of the rest...."
> >> -C. S. Lewis

Simple enough of a question, no?

> On Monday, June 14, 2004, at 12:03PM, James [last name deleted]
> wrote:
>
> >1) considerate
> >2) compromising
> >
> >or if all else fails,
> >1) left boob
> >2) right boob
> >
> >or if you want to get technical...
> >
> >1) l@bi@ majora
> >2) l@bia minora
> >
> >--------------------------------------
> >James [last name deleted]
> >Underground Construction Company, Inc.
> >oops i left my e-mail here hope nobody saw it
> >o: 707-746-8800 x104
> >f: 707-746-1314
> >c: 707-590-3121
> >http://www.undergrnd.com
> >--------------------------------------

And so it begins... now realize it's Monday, the day after the Sabbath, so you'd expect Soggy Brent/Chocolate Brent/Filipino Brent not to be so soggy, right? Ah, you should be so fortunate...

> From: Brent [last name BALEETED][mailto:CHOCOLATESTARFISH@mac.com]
> Sent: Monday, June 14, 2004 2:53 PM
> To: James [last name deleted]
> Subject: RE: Question
>
>
> Dear James,
>
> Thank you for the clarification. I shall query my
> acquaintances who are in search of room and board in the East
> Bay and determine which, if any, of those qualities are
> inherent in them.
>
> I would hope that I have the first set of attributes, and I
> am sure that I do possess the second set. As for the third
> set, I am not absolutely certain, however I am confident that
> I should be able to purchase them at a reasonable price.
> Unfortunately at this time, I am not requiring to live in Oakland.
>
> Sincerely yours,
> Brent

Poor, poor soggy brent

> -----Original Message-----
> From: James [last name deleted]
> Sent: Monday, June 14, 2004 2:54 PM
> To: 'Brent [last name BALEETED]

'
> Subject: RE: Question
>
>
> OK and see?? you just made the blog
>
> nice job dude
>
> Tio Jaime
>
> --------------------------------------
> James [last name deleted]
> Underground Construction Company, Inc.
> no e-mail here either anymore
> o: 707-746-8800 x104
> f: 707-746-1314
> c: 707-590-3121
> http://www.undergrnd.com
> --------------------------------------

Check and mate.

all my love (especially if your name begins with an "L" and ends in a "akerLisa"),
Tio Jaime

ps- mindee, g/l w/your new prospective work endeavor. You're hardcore. And please have your sac-friends stalk Crap-On-Your-Bed Girl for me.

http://www.fcc.gov/Speeches/Tristani/Statements/2000/stgt026.txt

It's the Don and Mike Show, and they'll say what they wish!

So it looks like a few years back, some town in texas passed a law making spanish its official language.  Which pissed off D&M (which puzzles me, as they're of the liberal persuasion), and so they called the town and told one of the town officials "eat me" in spanish...  also, "eat shit and die" (in spanish)

hilarity ensued.  as did FCC action. 

Now, I do like mexican chicks much like the one who was the subject of D&M's ridicule, but I like D&M better.  Although I can't potentially make out with Don Geronimo and Mike O'Meara.

Went to Home Depot today.  Home Depot girl wasn't there =(

maybe tomorrow...

4 Birdstone 74.00 14.00 8.60
9 Smarty Jones 3.30 2.60
6 Royal Assault 6.10

$2 Ex 4-9 $139.00
$2 Tri 4-9-6 $1,589.00
$2 Super 4-9-6-8 $11,679.00
$2 DD 5-4) $526.00
$2 Pk3 3-5-4 $2,910.00
$2 Pk4 1-3-5-4 $7,309.00
$2 Pk6 4-3-1-3-5-4 $47,421.00

BIRDSTONE BY A LENGTH IN THE FINAL STRETCH!

Poke00210 (3:41:55 PM): i'm gonna try to blog this
Poke00210 (3:42:57 PM): and i'm not going to jinx it by saying Smarty Jones is gonna win the triple crown... i'm actually counting on capturing yet another historical moment slipping through our fingers
Poke00210 (3:43:17 PM): and oh yes, oh yes, i will have captured it in blog form
Poke00210 (3:44:01 PM): fucking stupid New York
Poke00210 (3:44:21 PM): only place more full of itself than L
Poke00210 (3:44:25 PM): than LA is NY
Poke00210 (3:44:51 PM): last time less than even money raced in belmont was 3-5 Affirmed in 1978
Poke00210 (3:45:43 PM): i'm gonna pick the exacta Rock Hard Ten with Smarty Jones
Poke00210 (3:46:05 PM): no, i'm gonna jinx it and say Smarty Jones with Rock Hard Ten
Poke00210 (3:46:20 PM): if he loses now, it's because this blog entry a few minutes before post time jinxed it
Poke00210 (3:47:34 PM): Exacta 9 with 5
Poke00210 (3:47:47 PM): #5 Rock Hard Ten finally made it into the gates
Poke00210 (3:48:41 PM): And they're off!
Poke00210 (3:48:45 PM): smarty jones takes early lead
Poke00210 (3:48:55 PM): rock hard 10 behind
Poke00210 (3:49:02 PM): eddington outside smarty
Poke00210 (3:49:04 PM): caiman in 5th
Poke00210 (3:49:23 PM): purge, rock hard, smarty jones after the first turn!
Poke00210 (3:49:38 PM): rock hard ten and smarty jones coming up on outside
Poke00210 (3:49:43 PM): smarty jones takes lead on outside
Poke00210 (3:49:50 PM): eddington outside smarty jones
Poke00210 (3:49:58 PM): two lengths behind on the back stretch
Poke00210 (3:50:02 PM): smarty jones and rock had ten
Poke00210 (3:50:13 PM): 3/4 1:11 3/5
Poke00210 (3:50:26 PM): smarty jones and rock hard ten going into the final turn
Poke00210 (3:50:31 PM): smarty jones by length and a half
Poke00210 (3:50:38 PM): rock hard 10 3 lengths behind
Poke00210 (3:50:41 PM): 4 length lead!
Poke00210 (3:50:45 PM): rock hard back to third
Poke00210 (3:50:47 PM): in the stretch
Poke00210 (3:50:49 PM): smartyh jones!
Poke00210 (3:50:58 PM): one furllong!
Poke00210 (3:51:00 PM): oh shit1
Poke00210 (3:51:06 PM): bird stone!
Poke00210 (3:51:13 PM): bird stone by a length!
Poke00210 (3:51:16 PM): holy fuck!
Poke00210 (3:51:49 PM): holy shit that was INTENSE
Poke00210 (3:55:26 PM): 4-9-5?
Poke00210 (3:55:35 PM): they gonna post the results?
Poke00210 (3:56:17 PM): wow, yahoo sports posted the results pretty quickly
Poke00210 (3:58:05 PM): oh shit i jinxed it
Poke00210 (3:58:29 PM): I singlehandedly prevented the first triple crown winner since i was born in 1978
Poke00210 (3:59:50 PM): Ok they posted the results but it was too fast
Poke00210 (4:06:16 PM): Ok they're not posting the payoffs
Poke00210 (4:06:27 PM): i'll get them to you later today

RONALD REAGAN HAS DIED

truly a great patriot... and the anti-American community abroad and here at home breathes a collective sigh of relief

and Smarty Jones is down to 1-5

OK correction: Seattle Slew was the latest horse to win the Triple Crown undefeated... the other one was... (gimme a couple of seconds to find it)

Citation in 1948?

oh wait, ESPN is saying that only Seattle Slew was undefeated when he won...

will check in in a bit

Poke00210 (2:02:21 PM): howdy
Poke00210 (2:03:05 PM): and after a brief hiatus, the California Marching Band Glockenspiel Alumni Association is proud to present Fox's 24, Season Two
Poke00210 (2:03:25 PM): Presented without commercials courtesy of My Roommate Lincoln
Poke00210 (2:03:36 PM): 9pm - 10pm
“Poke00210” is away from the computer as of 2:03:42 PM.
Poke00210 (2:04:05 PM): lemme have a bit of lunch before i start
Poke00210 (2:04:44 PM): why do i feel like Sam Byck, sitting here, eating BK, talking to nobody in particular
Poke00210 (2:04:48 PM): PREVIOUSLY ON 24
Poke00210 (2:04:52 PM): PRESIDENT JACK PALMER!
Poke00210 (2:04:55 PM): I MEAN DAVID PALMER
Poke00210 (2:04:59 PM): oops, commandos are dead
Poke00210 (2:05:02 PM): KIM BAUER!!!
Poke00210 (2:05:24 PM): MARIE WARNER, semi-cute terrorist chick
Poke00210 (2:05:31 PM): JACK BAUER!
Poke00210 (2:05:51 PM): oops, it's a decoy!
Poke00210 (2:06:02 PM): The following takes place betwen 9:00 PM and 10:00 PM
Poke00210 (2:06:17 PM): Dude, Where's Our Bomb?
Poke00210 (2:06:37 PM): torture him!
Poke00210 (2:06:54 PM): aww yeah, requesting translator @ hangar 21
Poke00210 (2:07:03 PM): I repeat, requesting translator @ hangar 21
Poke00210 (2:07:17 PM): George Mason!
Poke00210 (2:07:22 PM): jack bauer on line 2
Poke00210 (2:08:36 PM): the george man is spacing out
Poke00210 (2:09:25 PM): ooh, dude where's my seventh commando
Poke00210 (2:09:39 PM): surprised that terrorist didn't eat a cyanide pill
Poke00210 (2:10:29 PM): yay! i love you dad
Poke00210 (2:10:41 PM): even though you raised a terrorist for a daughter
Poke00210 (2:11:53 PM): yeah siddown First Bitch
Poke00210 (2:12:17 PM): i don't like the First Bitch
Poke00210 (2:12:46 PM): I'm not the President right now!
Poke00210 (2:12:54 PM): Whatever you did, I'm sure... that you're sorry.
Poke00210 (2:13:10 PM): Don't do this First Bitch!
Poke00210 (2:13:22 PM): bitch!
Poke00210 (2:13:53 PM): hmm, i think i need to go back one episode and see what exactly that roger stanton dude did again
Poke00210 (2:14:04 PM): oh yeah, you conniving bitch
Poke00210 (2:14:10 PM): only to gain his confidence
Poke00210 (2:14:20 PM): yeah right
Poke00210 (2:14:24 PM): beeyotch
Poke00210 (2:15:36 PM): i like how agent baker is an asian dude
Poke00210 (2:15:47 PM): maybe it's a code name
Poke00210 (2:16:05 PM): uh oh, something bad's gonna happen
Poke00210 (2:16:23 PM): oh shit, it's terrorist sister
Poke00210 (2:16:31 PM): !
Poke00210 (2:16:36 PM): 09:11:26
Poke00210 (2:16:45 PM): 09:15:42
Poke00210 (2:17:06 PM): ooh kim bauer
Poke00210 (2:17:29 PM): we may have to repopulate the LA area
Poke00210 (2:18:05 PM): uh oh
Poke00210 (2:18:08 PM): stupid kim
Poke00210 (2:18:29 PM): SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU CRASH CALIFORNIA HIGHWAY PATROL VEHICLES?
Poke00210 (2:18:38 PM): oh, and you still don't listen to your dad
Poke00210 (2:18:42 PM): dumbshit
Poke00210 (2:18:51 PM): new chick
Poke00210 (2:19:13 PM): paula replacement
Poke00210 (2:20:29 PM): whoops, he slipped
Poke00210 (2:20:52 PM): dueling CTU-chicks
Poke00210 (2:21:23 PM): yay! playing the jack card
Poke00210 (2:21:55 PM): dumbfuck did it too
Poke00210 (2:22:07 PM): hey sis!
Poke00210 (2:22:16 PM): hey, sis w/gun!
Poke00210 (2:22:58 PM): blah blah blah CIA is bad
Poke00210 (2:23:23 PM): ouch
Poke00210 (2:23:27 PM): duelling sisters!
Poke00210 (2:24:12 PM): YEAH
Poke00210 (2:24:24 PM): EAT THAT TERRORIST CHICK WHO USED TO BE ON NICKELODEON
Poke00210 (2:24:38 PM): 09:23:44!
Poke00210 (2:24:43 PM): 09:27:57
Poke00210 (2:25:02 PM): yeah that's right
Poke00210 (2:25:09 PM): stupid sister
Poke00210 (2:25:18 PM): "blah blah blah, you have to treat her!"
Poke00210 (2:25:34 PM): oh YES! torture her
Poke00210 (2:25:40 PM): use electrodes
Poke00210 (2:25:49 PM): i take it she's not getting married then
Poke00210 (2:26:03 PM): well, what w/her shooting her not-so-terrorist fiance
Poke00210 (2:26:14 PM): and getting shot herself
Poke00210 (2:26:44 PM): torture her!
Poke00210 (2:27:42 PM): yeah bitch! you can't step to jack's shit!
Poke00210 (2:27:45 PM): hmm
Poke00210 (2:27:52 PM): that Rooney guy again
Poke00210 (2:28:40 PM): Ok after this, we're gonna watch coverage of the Belmont Stakes, where Smarty Jones seeks to become the only other undefeated winner of the Triple Crown
Poke00210 (2:28:44 PM): oh look, the TV works
Poke00210 (2:28:51 PM): stupid kim
Poke00210 (2:28:57 PM): oh, smart kim!
Poke00210 (2:29:04 PM): hey, i found sugar!
Poke00210 (2:29:27 PM): hi ann-chick
Poke00210 (2:29:53 PM): and ann-chick's nemesis
Poke00210 (2:30:02 PM): dueling CTU-chicks!
Poke00210 (2:30:59 PM): George Mason is stepping down
Poke00210 (2:31:10 PM): after a season and a half of being somewhat of a dick
Poke00210 (2:32:12 PM): i think i'm spoiling this tender moment by eating onion rings
Poke00210 (2:32:19 PM): Goodbye, George mason!
Poke00210 (2:32:53 PM): whoa that was weird... the time stamp didn't beep
Poke00210 (2:33:07 PM): it was like 9:40 or something...
Poke00210 (2:33:37 PM): tony almeida rallying the troops!
Poke00210 (2:33:56 PM): nice chest hair, tony
Poke00210 (2:34:19 PM): yeah dude
Poke00210 (2:34:37 PM): extract that shit, jack!
Poke00210 (2:34:48 PM): jax-traction!
Poke00210 (2:35:13 PM): dueling sisters, redux!
Poke00210 (2:35:39 PM): ooh yeah, hi kate
Poke00210 (2:36:08 PM): annoying spacey terrorist chick
Poke00210 (2:36:51 PM): yay! i'm not going to tell you even though you're my sister!
Poke00210 (2:37:10 PM): she was cuter when she was on nickelodeon
Poke00210 (2:37:11 PM): brb
Poke00210 (2:41:10 PM): ooh demerol is wearing off
Poke00210 (2:41:14 PM): stupid terrorist chick
Poke00210 (2:41:32 PM): not so ready to die are you?
Poke00210 (2:43:04 PM): conniving terrorist chick
Poke00210 (2:43:26 PM): ooh yeah
Poke00210 (2:43:32 PM): 09:47?40
Poke00210 (2:43:37 PM): 47:40
Poke00210 (2:43:41 PM): 09:51:55
Poke00210 (2:44:07 PM): aww yeah gettin' your CIA mojo on baby
Poke00210 (2:45:46 PM): hmm, looks like sherry isn't the bad chick
Poke00210 (2:45:53 PM): right now
Poke00210 (2:45:56 PM): and not yet
Poke00210 (2:46:19 PM): you leave now!
Poke00210 (2:46:38 PM): ooh yeah
Poke00210 (2:46:42 PM): place her under arrest
Poke00210 (2:47:04 PM): i bet that's executive code for "get all freeky deeky"
Poke00210 (2:47:58 PM): stupid kim
Poke00210 (2:48:08 PM): don't use knives you dumbass
Poke00210 (2:48:55 PM): umm, OK this is getting weird
Poke00210 (2:49:04 PM): ooh ooh ooh, i have an idea!!!! give kim amnesia!
Poke00210 (2:49:20 PM): it can be a running gag... each season, at the stupidest time, somebody can get amnesia
Poke00210 (2:50:08 PM): this is totally fake.
Poke00210 (2:50:15 PM): dudes with bomb shelters get MASS chicks
Poke00210 (2:50:41 PM): kim's a heartbreaker
Poke00210 (2:51:06 PM): OK is *that* the bomb?
Poke00210 (2:51:46 PM): OK and an episode later, they find the bomb
Poke00210 (2:52:09 PM): 10:00:00
Poke00210 (2:52:15 PM): ooh yeah
Poke00210 (2:52:24 PM): OK that's enough for now, gonna watch the belmont stakes
Poke00210 (2:52:33 PM): Smarty Jones 2-5

It's all about Vietnamese...

you mighta seen this already..

tio J

I wanna grow my goatee again!

My foreman, Jose, is starting up a fu-manchu. They call him "Chica", apparently because he's effeminate. But he's married with children.

Mexican chicks are pretty dope-tastic, yo. Only problem is, it looks like I'm the only Californian who doesn't know any Mexican chicks.

**Hola, muchacho**
**Whoa, how'd you do that?!?**

Well, Ok lemme see...
1) Mindee, but she's only half (i think) and i'm not white,
2) Priscilla, but she's probably still pissed at me for mentioning her in my letter-to-the-editor in the Daily Cal five years ago,
3) Priscilla's mom, but she's married to priscilla's dad and i like priscilla's dad and they're dodger fans anyway,
4) Gaby, but she's a blondish-sorority mexi-chick who has a boyfriend and a cute ecuadorian friend Maria,
5) Maria except she's Ecuadorian and not mexican,
and 6) Crap-On-Your-Bed Girl, except that she's white and only dates mexicans who work at fucking Home Depot.

Did i miss anybody?

Oh, 6) speaking of Home Depot, Veronica, that cute chick who flirtatiously rang me up yesterday as I was picking up some safety fence, fence posts and some silt fence. Except that she might not even be 18. We saw each other in our safety orange clothing, and we knew we were *meant to be*.

There, see? I'm the only Californian who doesn't know any Mexican chicks. I know an armenian and more hapas than I know what to do with, but no Mexican chicks.

OK so i should ask out Home Depot Chick. Hopefully she'll have a fake ID.

>
> SO F*CK YOU U FAG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>

check out the comments on my last post and ask yourself this... how is the "you" in "fuck you" different from the one in "you fag"?

why the hell would this little socal fuck-tard spell out the pronoun, but abbreviate it the very next word??

stupid little girls. please, don't even bother next time.

and such a foul mouth from a little girl, you'd think she could be one of the mexicans on my construction site

(no offense to any mexicans reading this... that sounded odd, i realize, but it's the truth-- my projects in California will be manned by mexican crews)

Tina Krol, esq. sent me another one of those quizzlets again. Lemme see if I can answer it in under 5 mins.

Oh, and just for shits-and-giggles, I'm gonna do it 3am Critic style too...

Shit, how the hell am i supposed to set that up?

here goes...

**********
Poke00210 (12:25:41 AM): OK i think Poke00210 (me) can ask the questions...
unkajimmy858 (12:26:05 AM): ...and Unkajimmy858 (also me) will answer
Poke00210 (12:26:19 AM): ahh jesus this is gonna take a while, huh?
Poke00210 (12:26:28 AM): OK opening up tina's e-mail
Poke00210 (12:26:51 AM): Subject: Another one-a these for ya . . .
Poke00210 (12:27:01 AM): Where has our time for nurturing friendships gone? Welcome to the Spring2004 edition of getting to know your friends. What you are supposedto do is copy (not forward) this entire e-mail and paste it onto a new e-mailthat you'll send. Change all the answers so they apply to you, and thensend this to a whole bunch of people including the person who sent it to you.The theory is that you will learn a lot of little things about your friends, if you did not know them already!
Poke00210 (12:27:15 AM): 1. What time do you get up?
unkajimmy858 (12:27:31 AM): around 5am... construction world starts @ 7am
Poke00210 (12:27:58 AM): 2. If you could eat lunch with one person, who would it be?
unkajimmy858 (12:28:19 AM): Ronald Reagan
Poke00210 (12:28:30 AM): 3. Gold or silver?
unkajimmy858 (12:28:35 AM): silver
Poke00210 (12:28:43 AM): 4. What was the last film you saw at the cinema?
unkajimmy858 (12:29:14 AM): "At the cinema???" did you get this from canadians, tina? I'll have to say The Ladykillers w/tom hanks... that coen brothers film
Poke00210 (12:29:29 AM): 5. What is/are your favorite TV show(s)?
unkajimmy858 (12:29:38 AM): 24, and The Shield
unkajimmy858 (12:30:06 AM): and interestingly enough, I've never watched an episode of those two during the network broadcasts... DVD collections only
Poke00210 (12:30:17 AM): 6. What did you have for breakfast
unkajimmy858 (12:30:25 AM): brekk-fust?
Poke00210 (12:30:42 AM): 7. Who would you hate to be locked in a room with?
unkajimmy858 (12:31:00 AM): A Laker fan, unless it's Crap-On-Your-Bed Girl
Poke00210 (12:31:30 AM): 8. What is your middle name?
unkajimmy858 (12:31:35 AM): Jordan
Poke00210 (12:31:44 AM): 9. Beach, City or Country?
unkajimmy858 (12:31:47 AM): City
Poke00210 (12:32:19 AM): 10. Do you own or rent your home
unkajimmy858 (12:32:24 AM): rent
Poke00210 (12:32:38 AM): 11. Butter, plain or salted popcorn?
unkajimmy858 (12:32:57 AM): No more popcorn!! worked at the UA theaters in SJ after high school... never again
Poke00210 (12:33:11 AM): 12. Favorite color?
unkajimmy858 (12:33:15 AM): Yale Blue
unkajimmy858 (12:33:19 AM): Go Bears
Poke00210 (12:33:26 AM): 13. What kind of car(s) do you drive?
unkajimmy858 (12:33:48 AM): 7am-5pm: Chevy 1500 1/2 ton, UCCo truck # 120035
unkajimmy858 (12:34:04 AM): after hours, 2001 Toyota Tacoma, answers to the name UESC Lorelai
Poke00210 (12:34:17 AM): 14. Favorite sandwich?
unkajimmy858 (12:34:37 AM): The Monte Cristo at the cardinal lounge (san jose, CA)
Poke00210 (12:34:47 AM): 15. What characteristic do you despise?
unkajimmy858 (12:35:06 AM): disrespect
Poke00210 (12:35:13 AM): 16. Favorite flower?
unkajimmy858 (12:35:36 AM): Orchids. whether in bouquets or corsages... i always give orchids
Poke00210 (12:35:48 AM): 17. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go?
unkajimmy858 (12:37:01 AM): New York, New York... Paris... Treasure Island... Slots of Fun... Bally's
unkajimmy858 (12:37:13 AM): oh wait, he's talking about *vegas*
Poke00210 (12:37:23 AM): 18. What color is your bathroom?
unkajimmy858 (12:37:56 AM): whatever it was painted. IDFK, IDFC
Poke00210 (12:38:07 AM): 19. Favorite brand of clothing?
unkajimmy858 (12:39:06 AM): I like Burberry accessories, but lately have had a penchant for Dolce-Gabanna and Versace.
unkajimmy858 (12:39:11 AM): Ok that's a fucking lie.
unkajimmy858 (12:39:21 AM): I wear Cambridge Classics from Mervyn's
unkajimmy858 (12:39:27 AM): Big Dog
unkajimmy858 (12:39:33 AM): Old Navy
unkajimmy858 (12:39:46 AM): I have a pair of Bugle Boy jeans...
unkajimmy858 (12:39:54 AM): and socks. lots of brown socks
Poke00210 (12:40:04 AM): 20. Where would you retire to?
unkajimmy858 (12:40:39 AM): Vegas, baby. giants games, horse racing and complimentary scotch... can't hardly wait
Poke00210 (12:40:51 AM): 21. Favorite day of the week?
unkajimmy858 (12:41:01 AM): Febturday!
Poke00210 (12:41:10 AM): 22. What did you do for your last birthday
Poke00210 (12:41:14 AM): ?
unkajimmy858 (12:41:41 AM): Joe's for dinner, Larry's for drinks/cake/Grace
Poke00210 (12:41:51 AM): 23. Where were you born?
unkajimmy858 (12:42:03 AM): my mom said a stork brought me to el camino hospital
unkajimmy858 (12:42:15 AM): mountain view, CA... right by maud's parents' house
Poke00210 (12:42:25 AM): 24. Favorite sport to watch?
unkajimmy858 (12:43:03 AM): LAKURZ BASKETBALL, BABY!!! BOOYAH SHAQ-DADDY'S TAKING THE BOYS ALL THE WAY JIGGA WHA?!?
unkajimmy858 (12:43:07 AM): LOL
unkajimmy858 (12:43:11 AM): FUCK THE LAKURZ
unkajimmy858 (12:43:20 AM): basketball is for retards
unkajimmy858 (12:43:46 AM): Baseball makes your mind sharp. It's dull to those with dull minds.
Poke00210 (12:43:57 AM): 25. Who do you least expect to send this back to you?
unkajimmy858 (12:44:09 AM): Tina Krol, esq.
Poke00210 (12:44:17 AM): 26. Person you expect to send it back first?
unkajimmy858 (12:44:32 AM): "Chocolate" Brent [last name BALEETED]
Poke00210 (12:44:40 AM): 27. What fabric detergent do you use
unkajimmy858 (12:44:54 AM): whatever's @ my mom's house or grandma's house
Poke00210 (12:45:01 AM): 28. Coke or Pepsi?
unkajimmy858 (12:45:15 AM): Coke... otherwise Pepsi
unkajimmy858 (12:45:24 AM): hmm, duh
unkajimmy858 (12:45:33 AM): dr pepper, otherwise coke. otherwise pepsi
Poke00210 (12:45:45 AM): 29. Are you a morning person or a night owl?
unkajimmy858 (12:45:49 AM): night owl
unkajimmy858 (12:45:56 AM): SHIT IT'S 1245
unkajimmy858 (12:46:14 AM): damn you tina krol, esq.
unkajimmy858 (12:46:40 AM): and your nice eyes, and your enchanting fervor for Mariners baseball
unkajimmy858 (12:46:43 AM): go m's
unkajimmy858 (12:46:47 AM): i wanna go to sleep
Poke00210 (12:46:57 AM): 30. What is your shoe size?
unkajimmy858 (12:47:07 AM): 10 1/2 or 11 extra wide
Poke00210 (12:47:15 AM): 31. Do you have any pets?
unkajimmy858 (12:47:31 AM): i did until my sister brainwashed my Georgia-dog
Poke00210 (12:47:39 AM): 32. Who sent this to you?
unkajimmy858 (12:47:46 AM): tina krol, esq.
unkajimmy858 (12:48:00 AM): helping perpetuate my thing for lawyers since 2003
Poke00210 (12:48:09 AM): 33. What is your favorite leisure-time thing to do?
unkajimmy858 (12:48:25 AM): lately? go to the racetrack
**********

OK that took waay longer than i expected

lemme send you all a link, and goodnight

go giants,
James

ps- i hate arizona