Tio Jaime: Aleph One

Blogger is taking a giant shit right now, so I'm forced to get my blog-fix through the Xanga Province of Tio Jaime Nation.

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OK and now i'm falling asleep. I better get some work done...

Jihad Jimmy

Curious about the Ghost of Jimmy Past? start here with Cal Percussion

Haven't e-mailed the kids in a while, here's my obligatory e-mail for the semester...

From: "Jihad Jimmy" To: calpercussion Date: Mar 29 2005 10:04:18 Subject: Blast from your Wet Filipino Past or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Math 1A and 1B Hey kids, I've routed all the calpercusion@uclink4 e-mails to my g-mail account set up specifically for that purpose (if you don't know what uclink4 is, hi I'm james, i used to play glock/cymbals/glymbals/bass-drum-every-once-in-a-while. i'm sure they've told you a few stories about me. They're probably all true, except the one about me booting in shmerling's washing machine). I only check my gmail once a month or so, and click on an interesting looking e-mail thread. Clicked on one talking about new uniforms. some old farts checked in, and even some newly oldened old farts (at least I think they're brand new old farts, should've graduated) and Keeper Emeritus Nate asked that I confirm that the vests offered some bit of protection to your typical cal cymbalist. And the answer is a resounding yes, provided that you were as hardcore as Keeper Nate and Cymbals Ben. Be it not me to judge you current Cal Cymbals on your hardcorosity or God Forbid your lack thereof; I know the names of 2, maybe 3 cymbals and in all honesty I paid more attention to Cal Cheer from my young alumni seats in UU than i did to the cymbals despite my never having been in the former while spending two years in the latter. So anycrap, the real reason I'm e-mailing Cal Percussion: my neighbor is asking me, her berkeley engineer neighbor how feasible it is to take Math 1A and 1B w/o having taken pre-calculus. Alas, I was not able to answer her question as 1) I was a freshman in 1996 and 2) fuckity-fuck, I AP'd out of 1A and 1B anyway and grabbed my ankles for 54 and 53 my freshman year right off the bat. So, kids, I ask you: does 1A and 1B require any knowledge which would have been imparted to pre-calculus students? I'm guessing this entails trig, eff-ing around w/polynomials, maybe even limits and shit too huh?? Oh wait, that glock Kim is now a cymbal, isn't she! I think that brings the total number of cymbals who i can name to 4. all my love, James ps- was actually thinking about you kids this morning... 'In the Stone" came up in rotation on my iPod Shuffle on the way to work. Started singing the Surrogate Sara lyrics to myself...

Maybe one of these days I'll post a "Best of Unka Jimmy" to show you just what one of these long e-mails was... good shit... and here's another old fart, he was a year behind me, played snare drum

We were CalPercussion

SnareDrumAsa (10:47:00 AM): just read your email, brings back old times man GlockJimmy (11:00:59 AM): dave flaherty was telling me once that the art of the Long, Rambling E-mail to an e-mail list is long gone SnareDrumAsa (11:04:58 AM): quite right you are SnareDrumAsa (11:05:17 AM): it's all business now, and when it does go to that sort of humour, it's done without the grace that once was GlockJimmy (11:08:37 AM): We were Bandsmen, and young once SnareDrumAsa (11:08:49 AM): lies, I'll deny it GlockJimmy (11:10:18 AM): Sorry... shoudl've read We were Bandsmen Once... And Young GlockJimmy (11:10:27 AM): http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0679411585/qid=1112123373/sr=8-1/ref=sr_8_xs_ap_i1_xgl14/103-3253523-3799008?v=glance&s=books&n=507846 SnareDrumAsa (11:10:51 AM): I understand

Alas, this was a couple of lifetimes ago. I still get my marching band dork fix from time to time though... keep your eyes peeled, as I'm still Cocked, Locked and ready to Glock

all my love,
Jihad Jimmy

Not exactly sure how i managed to send this e-mail w/the link to itself, but I did.  I think.

Weird huh?  I sent her an e-mail which contains a link to this post which is just a recap of the e-mail I sent to her which contains a link to this post which is just a recap of the e-mail I sent to her which contains a link to this post which is just a recap of the e-mail I sent to her which contains a link to this post which is just a recap of the e-mail I sent to her.If a Borg ship is ever threatening your outpost or God Forbid your home planet, just send them an e-mail with a link to that post.  You'll trip up their shit and you'll be fine.  Enjoy.

Reply-To: Jihad Jimmy (R - Dylan, Naomi) From: Jihad Jimmy (R - Dylan, Naomi) To: Dylan (U – James) Subject: Makin' the blog ooh yeah Date: Mon, 28 Mar 2005 08:26:26 -0800 Gorgeous, Here.  You've made the blog.  It wasn't anything really profound, but if anything you'd be the Second Person in terms of narration.  Does that make sense?  I'm an engineer, so there's a huge chance that i butchered something which you humanities kids would've jumped all over in a heartbeat... http://sixhertz.blogspot.com/2005/03/pg-maybe-im-reading-into-this-bit-too.html http://sixhertz.blogspot.com/2005/03/r-3am-criticism-of-amazing-race-7.html (this one gets pretty un-PC, not sure if you're into that kinda thing...  also, i'm culturing a strong distaste for Boston because of Boston Rob from survivor.  don't take it personally) http://sixhertz.blogspot.com/2005/03/pg-13-better-i-post-here-than-on-cl.html and crap, i thought there were more dylan occurrences.  I guess not.  Still confused by the second person thing?  you're like the lawyer in From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler, and I am like Mrs. Frankweiler herself, narrating the story to you but in novel form.  *now* are you confused? http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0440431808/103-3253523-3799008 OK and see, now i've written enough to make yet another post...  http://www.xanga.com/item.aspx?user=TioJaime&tab=weblogs&uid=230912792 it took a bit of dealie-tweakage to get you the link above which is just this e-mail, but in blog form for everybody else to read. take care, Jimmy James

Sent this to myself. Subject line was "post this". It appears as if i was coherent enough to want to post this. here you go

and it's xb0x0r baseball, not real baseball... enjoy

Jihad Jimmy, Chief Defender of the Faith

BloodPfhart (8:17:25 PM): hello dere! BloodPfhart (8:17:45 PM): having beer... BloodPfhart (8:18:06 PM): OK poke00210 is away now Poke00210 (8:18:07 PM): Craftin' right now... BloodPfhart (8:22:40 PM): opening night @ pac bell BloodPfhart (8:22:59 PM): tomko starting for the giants vs. penny for the dodgers BloodPfhart (8:23:53 PM): cesar izturis w/a leadoff triple BloodPfhart (8:26:11 PM): jeff kent 3-run homer BloodPfhart (8:26:16 PM): for the dodgers BloodPfhart (8:26:17 PM): dammit “BloodPfhart” has stopped using the computer at 8:36:22 PM, and is now considered idle. “BloodPfhart” has started using the computer again at 8:45:00 PM. BloodPfhart (8:45:08 PM): OK on the phone and i turned off the game BloodPfhart (8:45:18 PM): i was down 12-0 in the B2 anyway “BloodPfhart” is away from the computer as of 8:46:05 PM. “BloodPfhart” has stopped using the computer at 9:02:36 PM, and is now considered idle. “BloodPfhart” has started using the computer again at 9:09:47 PM. BloodPfhart (9:10:05 PM): OH IT'S BEER BEER BEER BloodPfhart (9:10:11 PM): THAT MAKES YOU WANNA CHEER BloodPfhart (9:10:14 PM): ON THE FARM, BloodPfhart (9:10:17 PM): ON THE FARM BloodPfhart (9:10:21 PM): OH IT'S BEER BEER BEER BloodPfhart (9:10:24 PM): THAT MAKES YOU WANNA CHEER BloodPfhart (9:10:30 PM): ON THE LELAND STANFURD JUNIOR FARM “BloodPfhart” has stopped using the computer at 9:20:35 PM, and is now considered idle. “BloodPfhart” has started using the computer again at 9:30:31 PM. “BloodPfhart” has stopped using the computer at 9:30:32 PM, and is now considered idle. “BloodPfhart” has started using the computer again at 10:00:31 PM. BloodPfhart (10:18:34 PM): ooh, Ok now i'm happily drunk BloodPfhart (10:18:39 PM): and i need another beer BloodPfhart (10:18:47 PM): MINE EYES BloodPfhart (10:18:49 PM): ARE DIM BloodPfhart (10:18:51 PM): I CAN BloodPfhart (10:18:54 PM): NOT SEE BloodPfhart (10:18:59 PM): I HAVE NOT BROUGHT MY SPECS WITH ME BloodPfhart (10:19:01 PM): OINK BloodPfhart (10:19:03 PM): OINK BloodPfhart (10:19:05 PM): OINK BloodPfhart (10:19:06 PM): OINK BloodPfhart (10:19:08 PM): SHIT BloodPfhart (10:19:37 PM): OH IT'S WINE WINE WINE / THAT MAKES YOU FEEL SO FINE/ ON THE FARM, / ON THE FARM BloodPfhart (10:19:54 PM): OH IT'S WINE WINE WINE / THAT MAKES YOU FEEL SO FINE / ON THE LELAND STANFURD JUNIOR FARM BloodPfhart (11:07:08 PM): yay and nown i'm watching seinfeld BloodPfhart (11:07:31 PM): wow you neurotic jew BloodPfhart (11:07:51 PM): i don't get it BloodPfhart (11:08:28 PM): hmm, something about jerry dating a model BloodPfhart (11:08:39 PM): this kinda sucks BloodPfhart (11:08:52 PM): and somehow she's amuse BloodPfhart (11:08:54 PM): amused BloodPfhart (11:09:26 PM): oh they're not gonna get away w/this BloodPfhart (11:10:27 PM): oh the other neurotic jew is getting worked up over a zipper BloodPfhart (11:10:39 PM): great BloodPfhart (11:10:44 PM): wow this show is rad BloodPfhart (11:10:46 PM): hey yeah BloodPfhart (11:11:43 PM): oh, apparently she's showing a nipple in her christmas picture BloodPfhart (11:11:44 PM): great BloodPfhart (11:11:49 PM): jews celebrate christmas BloodPfhart (11:11:53 PM): yeah right BloodPfhart (11:13:32 PM): and newman made an appearance BloodPfhart (11:13:36 PM): this show kinda blows BloodPfhart (11:13:41 PM): LOL BloodPfhart (11:13:48 PM): "everybody's got 'em" BloodPfhart (11:13:58 PM): and now they're fucking around w/the zipper BloodPfhart (11:14:20 PM): wow this show was getting good BloodPfhart (11:14:54 PM): and now they're tying it in w/elaine's nipple BloodPfhart (11:15:02 PM): and jerry's woman thought he was picking his nose BloodPfhart (11:15:04 PM): great BloodPfhart (11:18:15 PM): "was it a 'scratfch' or a 'pick"" BloodPfhart (11:18:22 PM): what a stupid show BloodPfhart (11:18:39 PM): "was there any 'nostril penetration'?" BloodPfhart (11:19:17 PM): lkkkkkkkkkkkkkk BloodPfhart (11:19:23 PM): OK fell aseep BloodPfhart (11:19:27 PM): asleep BloodPfhart (11:19:59 PM): oh BloodPfhart (11:20:15 PM): i was hoping that she'd rip her blouse open jane curtin style BloodPfhart (11:20:29 PM): and now kramer is sniffing her BloodPfhart (11:20:50 PM): lllllllllllllllllllll BloodPfhart (11:20:57 PM): fell asleep again BloodPfhart (11:21:18 PM): ooh george's GF is hot BloodPfhart (11:23:40 PM): OK stupid managed to getintertwined w/kramer's decent story line BloodPfhart (11:23:41 PM): WTF? BloodPfhart (11:26:16 PM): so far, so unfunny BloodPfhart (11:26:27 PM): OK commercialbreak BloodPfhart (11:41:40 PM): andn cheeaer'snbereis won

Why does it always seem like i'm crapping? In the two posts (here and here) prior to this, I'm crapping.

And you know what? I'm about to take a dump before gilmore girls.

with crap,
Jihad Jimmy, Chief Defender of the Faith

From last night. When I get a chance, I'll also post up what my bastard neighbors taped to my door one night when I was listening to the Don and Mike Show on my TINY DAMN CLOCK RADIO yet still managed to disturb them an entire floor away. After 10pm. Whatta bunch of hippie assholes.

3am Criticism of Jihad Jimmy's upstairs neighbors having loud sex

11:40 PM JihadJimmy: upstairs neighbors are having sex again SixHertzWhenIPee:: ugh JihadJimmy: oh she's moaning right now! SixHertzWhenIPee:: are they nasty looking people? JihadJimmy: no fucking idea 11:45 PM JihadJimmy: although these are the same people who got pissed @ me for watching TAR6 drunk in myown goddam apartment JihadJimmy: or rather, TAR5 JihadJimmy: oh that was fast SixHertzWhenIPee:: haha JihadJimmy: she was really screaming JihadJimmy: ooh, here they go again! JihadJimmy: man, i can't believe i'm 3am Criticizing MY UPSTAIRS NEIGHBORS HAVING SEX SixHertzWhenIPee:: you are not putting this on the SHoP JihadJimmy: yeah i'd imagine not SixHertzWhenIPee:: okay. JihadJimmy: pussy JihadJimmy: \Y/ JihadJimmy: aww, they're done =( 11:50 PM SixHertzWhenIPee:: so, that's about 5 minutes. JihadJimmy: wait, i can hear moaning again... SixHertzWhenIPee:: dude, I don't think I want a play by play of this shit. SixHertzWhenIPee:: JihadJimmy: too fucking bad JihadJimmy: the original 3am Critic was never fortunate to have this kind of internet gold SixHertzWhenIPee:: ahahah JihadJimmy: LOL JihadJimmy: and now the water's running upstairs JihadJimmy: off now SixHertzWhenIPee:: hahahaha 11:55 PM JihadJimmy: all silent on teh Bay Aryan front JihadJimmy: lazy bastards JihadJimmy: OK i'm calling it here SixHertzWhenIPee:: haha, probably no endurance. JihadJimmy: maybe they're SHoPpers or citizens of the Xanga Province and they're checking to see if they made the blogs... SixHertzWhenIPee:: delusions of grandeur, my friend. SixHertzWhenIPee:: JihadJimmy: sorry... SHoPpers or citizens of the Xanga Province JihadJimmy: that wasn't delusion of grandeur as it was wishful thinking SixHertzWhenIPee:: Just as long as I don't see this on the SHoP. JihadJimmy: look, nancy, you've already told me not to. i won't JihadJimmy: there'll be a link with explicit warnings JihadJimmy: but rest assured that this revolutionary 3amC will not appear on the SHoP SixHertzWhenIPee:: oh, joy. SixHertzWhenIPee:: JihadJimmy: oh can i have your chat transcript? JihadJimmy: my timestamp sucks JihadJimmy: if you could e-mail it and change your name out SixHertzWhenIPee:: ok SixHertzWhenIPee:: standby JihadJimmy: much obliged 12:05 AM SixHertzWhenIPee:: The TRUTH shall set you FREE! The email hath been sent. JihadJimmy: sounds good JihadJimmy: OH JESUS DUMPCON 2 JihadJimmy: DUMPCON 2 12:10 AM JihadJimmy: ALL HANDS ABANDON SHIP SixHertzWhenIPee:: *KLAXON* JihadJimmy: ALL HANDS ABANDON SHIP SixHertzWhenIPee:: *KLAXON* 12:15 AM JihadJimmy: OK actually your timestamp makes it impossible to change fonts using Find and Replace All JihadJimmy: i think i'll have to make do w/my iChat timestamp JihadJimmy: OK dude, i'm off to bed... SixHertzWhenIPee:: g'night buddy

All my love,
Jihad Jimmy, Chief Defender of the Faith

Welcome SHoPpers! Lay 9 to win 5 that SixHertz wouldn't have let me post this on the SHoP

Well, actually since nothing explicity naughty was put here w/o clicking on a link, i'm gonna change those odds now... lay 7 to win 5 on the Don't.

JihadJimmyCDF (9:59:27 AM): i was thinking about you this weekend JihadJimmyCDF (10:00:01 AM): i was asked if i knew what a "donkey punch" was Rico(10:00:16 AM): "Notice: All instant message communications sent to or from Felching Time Investments personnel may be retained, monitored and/or reviewed by FTI and their agents without notice or consent." Rico(10:00:16 AM): hee hee! JihadJimmyCDF (10:00:33 AM): i told them "we were demonstrating, and i was heidi klum" Rico(10:09:26 AM): "Notice: All instant message communications sent to or from Felching Time Investments personnel may be retained, monitored and/or reviewed by FTI and their agents without notice or consent." Rico(10:09:26 AM): nice Rico(10:09:31 AM): i love donkey punching JihadJimmyCDF (10:10:07 AM): i miss you and your donkey punching JihadJimmyCDF (10:10:46 AM): http://www.tomorrowideation.com/getoffended/Shirtpages/donkey.html JihadJimmyCDF (10:11:08 AM): oh they say the back of the head JihadJimmyCDF (10:12:03 AM): and a recipe for Donkey Punch... http://www.tomorrowideation.com/getoffended/Shirtpages/donkey.html Rico(10:12:24 AM): sounds yummy JihadJimmyCDF (10:12:30 AM): actually yeah JihadJimmyCDF (10:12:49 AM): brb JihadJimmyCDF (10:12:50 AM): dumpcon 2

Solving this jigsaw puzzle and posting about this sweepstakes for Big Red makes me eligible for free Xanga Premium for life...

that was fucking retarded.  thanks, jeff. 

if i win this premium for life, i will devote an entire blog to how xanga sucks gay monkey balls

all my love,
Jihad Jimmy, Chief Defender of the Faith

OK somebody found the Xanga Province of Tio Jaime Nation by searching the following...

http://search.yahoo.com/search?fr=slv1-&p=12%20to%2018%20yo%20getting%20undressed

WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?

so 12-yos are OK but not 11 or 10-yos?  And why the fuck not?  You pervs make me sick.  You're the reason we have guns.  Surprisingly, I have more disdain for you than I do hippies. 

Jihad Jimmy, Chief Defender of the Faith

ps- now that you pedophiles have sufficiently creeped me out, check out the SixHertz House of Pain, as we've now added LMHBrent to our illustrious ranks

Baseball starts a bit early in Tio Jaime Nation...

Opening Day

Bloodpfhart (10:22:21 PM): OH YES Bloodpfhart (10:22:39 PM): in Xbox action, bottom of the 2nd from SBC park Bloodpfhart (10:23:13 PM): Moises Alou hits a 432-ft homer off Odalis Perez in the Giants' Season Opener against rival LA Bloodpfhart (10:23:25 PM): huge towering Splash Hit into McCovey Cove Bloodpfhart (10:23:29 PM): stay tuned "Bloodpfhart” has stopped using the computer at 10:33:34 PM, and is now considered idle. "Bloodpfhart” has started using the computer again at 10:37:41 PM. Bloodpfhart (10:37:48 PM): top 4th Emily (10:37:48 PM): Hi, this is Emily, James's TiBook. He stepped away, he'll be right back. Bloodpfhart (10:38:00 PM): dodgers pick up 1 run Bloodpfhart (10:38:03 PM): bot 4th Bloodpfhart (10:38:36 PM): Jon Dowd hits triple to left center, moises alou hits single to left-center to score him from 3rd Bloodpfhart (10:38:39 PM): 2-all Bloodpfhart (10:47:27 PM): deivi cruz singles to right Bloodpfhart (10:47:36 PM): PH for schmidt Bloodpfhart (10:47:53 PM): ray durham triples to deep right-center in Bloodpfhart (10:47:59 PM): in B5 Bloodpfhart (10:48:04 PM): tied 3-3 1 out Bloodpfhart (10:49:10 PM): visquel reaches on E-6, scores durham Bloodpfhart (10:50:57 PM): brower brought in T6 Bloodpfhart (10:53:50 PM): bako ties game w/RBI single in T6 Bloodpfhart (11:00:14 PM): T7: moises alou hit by odalis perez Bloodpfhart (11:00:26 PM): B7: brower hits former Giant Jeff Kent Bloodpfhart (11:00:37 PM): Kent is 3 for 3 w/a HR Bloodpfhart (11:05:13 PM): dodgers' RF milton bradley injures self diving for line drive Bloodpfhart (11:07:10 PM): Jason Christiansen in for the G-men in the top fo the eighth Bloodpfhart (11:09:36 PM): FUCK Bloodpfhart (11:09:46 PM): Jayson werth 2 run homer for the dodgers in T8 ”Bloodpfhart” has stopped using the computer at 11:19:51 PM, and is now considered idle. ”Bloodpfhart” has started using the computer again at 11:21:26 PM. Bloodpfhart (11:21:52 PM): jim brower gets the opening day loss for the giants

all my love,
Jihad Jimmy, Chief Defender of the Faith

Oh, most glorious, glorious day!

Getting started w/Xb0x0r Live, sans instructions, sans router

7:12 PM Bloodpfhart: OK Bloodpfhart: finished cleaning and work for tomorrow morning Bloodpfhart: i think i've earned some quality xbox time Bloodpfhart: some Xb0x0r, as i was telling brent Bloodpfhart: and is Crimson Skies supposed to be like sky captain & the world of tomorrow or something? 7:15 PM Bloodpfhart: And I'm not sure if I pointed this out to you earlier, but one of the taglines for Xb0x0r Live is "DISCOVER THE FUN OF GAMING WITH REAL PEOPLE" Bloodpfhart: who the fuck comes up with this Micro$uck shit? I swear, I can't make this shit up Bloodfarmer: haha Bloodpfhart: oh, this is going up on a blog, btw Bloodfarmer: i never touched crimson skies Bloodpfhart: most likely xanga, so feel free to use bad words Bloodpfhart: like "poopy pants" Bloodpfhart: and "Dry Moist Hump Loaf" 7:20 PM Bloodpfhart: and wow, excellent work Micro$uck Bloodpfhart: thank you for assuming i know exactly how to sign up for Xb0x0r live, but don't know how to hook up the goddam communicator Bloodpfhart: wow, not a single instruction Bloodpfhart: oh wait, no no.. here it is Bloodpfhart: on the subscription card, hidden inside the free Sky Captain game Bloodpfhart: wow, does this company make an operating system too? i bet their interface would be second-to-none Bloodpfhart: all kinds of intuitive and shit 7:25 PM Bloodpfhart: OK gotta go radio silent, don't have a router Bloodpfhart: barely had enough cat-5 cable Bloodpfhart: heh Bloodpfhart: gotta steal some from work tomorrow... You left the chat by logging out or being disconnected.

And holy shit, can anybody tell me already why i can't have red as a font color in xanga???

San Francisco Giants 3, Los Angeles Fucktards Angels of Anaheim 2

9:03 PM Bloodpfhart: oh dude, finished my first game! Bloodpfhart: was playing against some UCLA dick Bloodpfhart: he chose the angels 9:25 PM Bloodfarmer: and? Bloodpfhart: 3-2 giants over the angels in Anaheim in 11 Bloodpfhart: he let me win because he got bored Bloodpfhart: it was a stalemate... Bloodpfhart: need to work on my timing Bloodpfhart: he had Colon just pitching 98-mph fastballs low the entire game Bloodpfhart: until colon had like 15% stamina Bloodpfhart: pulled him Bloodpfhart: this kid told me "i lick monkey balls" Bloodpfhart: ahh, wonderful 9:30 PM Bloodfarmer: welcome to xbox live

ooh, it appears as if i was able to change the colors in xanga because their html tags had different syntax... FF0000 versus "FF0000"

dumb assholes

OK time for more baseball... this time against the computer


UPDATE:  here's more background info, plus pics, cool japanese banners....  you'll like it.  All at the SixHertz House of Pain

Same game as before... pick from the following:

a) 0-10 mins
b) 10-20 mins
c) 20-30 mins
d) 30-40 mins
e) 40-50 mins
f) 50-60 mins

How long until Tio Jaime gets pissed and turns off The Apprentice?

Poke00210 (8:59:37 PM): an all new apprentice is coming up next right here on NBC Poke00210 (8:59:39 PM): great Poke00210 (9:00:31 PM): whoa i almost revealed my incognito name to you Poke00210 (9:00:47 PM): i turned on the away message and was about to message it Poke00210 (9:00:52 PM): just to see the away message Poke00210 (9:00:55 PM): heh Poke00210 (9:01:04 PM): OK let's get this shitty show on the fucking road already Poke00210 (9:01:55 PM): they did some stupid grafitti shit Poke00210 (9:02:21 PM): net worth lost Poke00210 (9:03:02 PM): tara was fired Poke00210 (9:03:06 PM): not that anybody gives a fuck Poke00210 (9:03:15 PM): and how did the black woman lose on the grafitti task? Poke00210 (9:03:42 PM): so far, so shitty Poke00210 (9:04:17 PM): ooh, she was jumping Poke00210 (9:05:16 PM): shit i should put the BANZAI banners on the xanga post Poke00210 (9:05:20 PM): i'll do it later Poke00210 (9:05:27 PM): oh sorry Poke00210 (9:05:37 PM): you should've PLACEd BETS NOW Poke00210 (9:05:42 PM): like 5 minutes ago Poke00210 (9:05:47 PM): oh she's pissed Poke00210 (9:05:50 PM): hot but pissed Poke00210 (9:06:03 PM): ooh she has nice eyes Poke00210 (9:06:10 PM): "i was so beautiful" Poke00210 (9:06:14 PM): waaa Poke00210 (9:06:19 PM): dumb cunt Poke00210 (9:06:39 PM): bleh, it's absolutely my business Poke00210 (9:06:51 PM): she said the F-word Poke00210 (9:07:02 PM): wow, i could be listening to D&M archives Poke00210 (9:07:06 PM): D&M replay Poke00210 (9:07:10 PM): i could wash dishes Poke00210 (9:07:31 PM): looking very good for 0-10 mins Poke00210 (9:07:35 PM): she said the f-word again Poke00210 (9:07:46 PM): WTF, i could get that on my own D&M clips Poke00210 (9:07:51 PM): this show is shitty Poke00210 (9:08:01 PM): they didn't play the shitty themesong, thank God Poke00210 (9:08:04 PM): oh no Poke00210 (9:08:07 PM): no no no Poke00210 (9:08:39 PM): oh shit, i thought i cauysed the shitty song to come on Poke00210 (9:08:42 PM): no song though Poke00210 (9:09:07 PM): nice tie Poke00210 (9:09:09 PM): not Poke00210 (9:09:26 PM): fillin in for george Poke00210 (9:09:40 PM): with trump on screen he could tdo this in under 30s Poke00210 (9:10:10 PM): they're gonna build and manage miniature golf course Poke00210 (9:10:50 PM): well they survived the first round of Donald retardedness Poke00210 (9:10:54 PM): i'm gonna take another dump brb Poke00210 (9:18:28 PM): OK back Poke00210 (9:18:36 PM): not that i've missed anything Poke00210 (9:19:04 PM): i kinda like the curt schilling / dave coulier looking guy Poke00210 (9:19:09 PM): and that chick looks kinda old Poke00210 (9:19:30 PM): yeah yeah yeah marketing Poke00210 (9:19:36 PM): 30s if you have 10-20mins Poke00210 (9:19:56 PM): wow i really don't give a fuck about this show Poke00210 (9:20:03 PM): i hope the martha stewart version will be better Poke00210 (9:20:26 PM): it should since martha's renewal of her 15 minutes isn't too far from her original 15 minutes Poke00210 (9:20:56 PM): somebody did something to somebody else Poke00210 (9:21:01 PM): and ideally i'd give a flying fuck Poke00210 (9:21:17 PM): nice hat retard-chick Poke00210 (9:21:51 PM): blah blah, john needs to make that decision Poke00210 (9:21:55 PM): yeah no shit Poke00210 (9:22:04 PM): thanks for cueing the dramatic music Poke00210 (9:22:25 PM): well DUMBFUCKS SHE JUST SAID YOU NEED TO MAKE THE DECISION Poke00210 (9:22:27 PM): WTF Poke00210 (9:22:38 PM): SHE DELEGATED YOU FUCKING RETARD Poke00210 (9:22:49 PM): this is shitty Poke00210 (9:22:56 PM): notlooking so good Poke00210 (9:23:04 PM): "this is a waste of time" Poke00210 (9:23:08 PM): no shit you cock Poke00210 (9:23:27 PM): blah blah, you're trying to set me up as a scapegoat Poke00210 (9:23:52 PM): wow, i'm guessing you're the lion and she's the gnat Poke00210 (9:23:58 PM): fuck this show Poke00210 (9:24:00 PM): i'm washing my dishes Poke00210 (9:24:12 PM): and no, i'm not going to fire the show Poke00210 (9:24:19 PM): FUCK YOU APPRENTICE Poke00210 (9:24:24 PM): ooh ooh Poke00210 (9:24:29 PM): victoria's secret commercial Poke00210 (9:24:31 PM): iPex Poke00210 (9:24:37 PM): too lttle, too late Poke00210 (9:24:40 PM): FUCK YOU APPRENTICE

here's a game for you...

How long until Tio Jaime gets pissed and turns off The OC

Poke00210 (7:57:45 PM): OK Poke00210 (7:57:49 PM): let's play a game Poke00210 (7:57:55 PM): well *you* can play the game Poke00210 (7:58:02 PM): it's 2 minutes to 8 Poke00210 (7:58:44 PM): let's play "How long until Tio Jaime gets pissed and turns off The OC" Poke00210 (7:58:48 PM): i've never watched the oc before Poke00210 (7:58:55 PM): really, the only appeal is the theme song Poke00210 (7:59:27 PM): i'm watching american choppers right now(?) Poke00210 (7:59:30 PM): not sure what this show is Poke00210 (7:59:33 PM): i don't watch it Poke00210 (7:59:40 PM): but it has the orange county chopper guys Poke00210 (7:59:43 PM): i miss OCDs Poke00210 (7:59:47 PM): OK gonna put fox on Poke00210 (8:00:01 PM): OK Poke00210 (8:00:05 PM): PLACE BETS NOW Poke00210 (8:00:14 PM): will tio jaime last: Poke00210 (8:00:21 PM): a) 0-10 mins Poke00210 (8:00:27 PM): whoops Poke00210 (8:00:30 PM): yeah Poke00210 (8:00:38 PM): a) 0-10 mins Poke00210 (8:00:47 PM): b) 10-20mins Poke00210 (8:00:53 PM): c) 20-30mins Poke00210 (8:00:59 PM): ooh teh pepsi chick Poke00210 (8:01:12 PM): and already i'm pissed because of this stupid gwen stefani song Poke00210 (8:01:13 PM): ooh Poke00210 (8:01:17 PM): hot gwen stefani Poke00210 (8:01:23 PM): d) 30-40mins Poke00210 (8:01:33 PM): e) 40-50mins Poke00210 (8:01:40 PM): or f) 50-60mins Poke00210 (8:01:46 PM): PReviously on The OC Poke00210 (8:01:55 PM): and they have a show called Teh Valley Poke00210 (8:02:01 PM): ooh a red head Poke00210 (8:02:06 PM): ooha brunette Poke00210 (8:02:16 PM): OK Poke00210 (8:02:22 PM): just go by the time stamp Poke00210 (8:02:23 PM): oh, sorry Poke00210 (8:02:27 PM): i forgot: BETTING ENDS Poke00210 (8:02:37 PM): oh, phone Poke00210 (8:02:38 PM): standby Poke00210 (8:03:04 PM): it's t Poke00210 (8:04:19 PM): he's done @ 9, no zoo though Poke00210 (8:04:21 PM): it's raining Poke00210 (8:04:28 PM): OK and the OC isn't that great Poke00210 (8:04:32 PM): California here we come Poke00210 (8:04:39 PM): right back where we started from Poke00210 (8:04:47 PM): i'm putting this game on hold Poke00210 (8:08:14 PM): OK well goddamit Poke00210 (8:08:17 PM): petros fucked the game up Poke00210 (8:08:27 PM): these kids? they might be kids Poke00210 (8:08:35 PM): they caught two people @ a hotel Poke00210 (8:08:40 PM): so is this about teenagers? Poke00210 (8:08:49 PM): something's gotta end Poke00210 (8:08:52 PM): before somebody finds out Poke00210 (8:09:01 PM): is that dude dave ragowski from Gilmore Girls? Poke00210 (8:09:15 PM): and it's some janky old guy Poke00210 (8:09:33 PM): reminds me of mr. big from that slutty hbo show Poke00210 (8:09:42 PM): sex in/and the city Poke00210 (8:09:59 PM): i could never tell because people who watch that show don'f fucking enunciate and use proper english Poke00210 (8:10:01 PM): oh, sorry Poke00210 (8:10:04 PM): did i say that out loud??? Poke00210 (8:10:17 PM): grown-ups arguing Poke00210 (8:10:23 PM): talking about designing something Poke00210 (8:10:28 PM): this blows Poke00210 (8:10:33 PM): i'm still watching though Poke00210 (8:10:43 PM): and realize that we'll be playing the same game w/the Apprentice Poke00210 (8:10:48 PM): ooh, two chicks on a beach Poke00210 (8:10:51 PM): presumably in orange county Poke00210 (8:11:02 PM): the tall one on the right has nice biznoogas Poke00210 (8:11:06 PM): and a skinny neck Poke00210 (8:11:23 PM): oh, they stumbled upon a shooting of The Valley Poke00210 (8:11:25 PM): great Poke00210 (8:11:33 PM): they're going to say hi Poke00210 (8:11:42 PM): who are these chicks? Poke00210 (8:11:47 PM): oh this is dumb Poke00210 (8:12:00 PM): the uninterested one is gonna end up w/the actor Poke00210 (8:12:14 PM): wow, a shitty show within a shitty show Poke00210 (8:12:19 PM): the brunette is kinda cute Poke00210 (8:12:25 PM): are they in a high school? Poke00210 (8:12:55 PM): that's either dave ragowski or jon favreau 10 years ago Poke00210 (8:13:04 PM): OK i'm getting my dinner... still watching though Poke00210 (8:13:09 PM): when i stop watching, you'll know Poke00210 (8:13:14 PM): oh shit how you'll know Poke00210 (8:15:36 PM): OK the old dude reminds me of mr. big from the kristin davis show because they're both goofy looking shitty white dudes Poke00210 (8:15:40 PM): that's the only real connection Poke00210 (8:15:50 PM): was one of these dudes in dawson's creek? Poke00210 (8:15:58 PM): and i think i might like one tree hill better Poke00210 (8:16:10 PM): brb Poke00210 (8:18:32 PM): well OK it looks as if i went past 10 minutes Poke00210 (8:18:55 PM): but don't let my ignorance of the time be mistaken for absorption in teh show Poke00210 (8:19:16 PM): looks like it won't make it back from the commercial before 20 mins Poke00210 (8:19:27 PM): so if you had 10-20mins, looks like you're out Poke00210 (8:19:36 PM): nevermind those losers who picked 0-10 Poke00210 (8:20:11 PM): although i might've done so, taking into account the proximity of the shitty gwen stefani song to the start of the show Poke00210 (8:20:18 PM): and we're past 20 mins Poke00210 (8:21:40 PM): shitty pizza commercial for roundtable that's a little late on the crankyankers bandwagon Poke00210 (8:21:44 PM): poor bastards Poke00210 (8:22:08 PM): oh look i won another song! Poke00210 (8:22:16 PM): and somehow, i lost one today Poke00210 (8:22:42 PM): i didn't really read the "PLAY AGAIN" or i probably saw it upside down and therefore didn't realize it said "PLAY AGAIN" Poke00210 (8:23:01 PM): this is getting stupid Poke00210 (8:23:05 PM): ha ha Poke00210 (8:23:06 PM): he got faced Poke00210 (8:23:33 PM): oh the guy from The Valley Poke00210 (8:23:51 PM): that old dude is from While You Were Sleeping Poke00210 (8:23:59 PM): ha ha he doesn't like LA Poke00210 (8:24:18 PM): whatevs Poke00210 (8:24:24 PM): orange county.... still LA Poke00210 (8:24:33 PM): oh she looks sickly Poke00210 (8:24:36 PM): she needs a cookie Poke00210 (8:25:02 PM): heh, nice bangs Poke00210 (8:25:05 PM): not really Poke00210 (8:25:17 PM): this show is going nowhere fast Poke00210 (8:25:37 PM): i'm claiming a song righ tnow... Poke00210 (8:25:43 PM): still watching Poke00210 (8:26:13 PM): ooh, cute redhead Poke00210 (8:26:16 PM): is she a grownup? Poke00210 (8:26:42 PM): ooh, she's a non-shitty version of allison janney Poke00210 (8:27:44 PM): WHATEVER YOU ASSHOLE, LIKE YOU DON'T HAVE SHITTY SOCAL TRAFFIC IN THE OC? Poke00210 (8:28:06 PM): ooh natalie portman and kiera knightley Poke00210 (8:28:14 PM): they're not gonna be ont he show are they Poke00210 (8:28:17 PM): ooh hi red Poke00210 (8:29:04 PM): hmm now she's making out w/what seems to be a kid, even though i thought she was his mom Poke00210 (8:29:06 PM): i suppose not Poke00210 (8:29:34 PM): heh, that building's street address was my PIN Poke00210 (8:30:05 PM): Team Grady Poke00210 (8:30:35 PM): ooh striippers Poke00210 (8:30:44 PM): OK that teenager chick loks old Poke00210 (8:30:48 PM): whoa Poke00210 (8:31:04 PM): isn't that paris hilton? Poke00210 (8:31:10 PM): "orange county? eww!" Poke00210 (8:31:22 PM): whoops, he knows one of the strippers Poke00210 (8:31:31 PM): oh yes victoria's secret commercial! Poke00210 (8:31:37 PM): if you had 20-30 you're out, btw Poke00210 (8:31:43 PM): oh my Poke00210 (8:31:48 PM): it's the ipex Poke00210 (8:31:51 PM): iPex, perhaps? Poke00210 (8:32:41 PM): hmm, i could be listening to the don and mike show Poke00210 (8:32:51 PM): that should speed up this game nicely Poke00210 (8:33:06 PM): i mean the realization that i could be listening to D&M will speed up the game Poke00210 (8:33:45 PM): why is there a m3 razor add during this show? what kind of non-blogging man watches the OC? Poke00210 (8:33:52 PM): and oh god, paris hilton is fucking nasty Poke00210 (8:34:10 PM): The Sketch Show Poke00210 (8:34:14 PM): kelsey grammer presents Poke00210 (8:34:35 PM): oh my the trailer for Episode three during The OC Poke00210 (8:34:40 PM): ooh 24 Poke00210 (8:34:44 PM): i could be watching 24 right now Poke00210 (8:35:12 PM): OK the stripper was somebody's sister Poke00210 (8:35:16 PM): is the redhead that somebody? Poke00210 (8:35:20 PM): are you that somebody Poke00210 (8:35:39 PM): grownups talking about a light house Poke00210 (8:36:07 PM): dude that guy's ugly Poke00210 (8:37:01 PM): he was supposed to take care of something Poke00210 (8:37:06 PM): but i'm guessing he didn't Poke00210 (8:38:46 PM): ooh, i was about to switch, but the redhead came back on Poke00210 (8:38:59 PM): meatloaf dude Poke00210 (8:39:17 PM): are you crying? there's no crying in restaurants Poke00210 (8:40:50 PM): and apparently paris hilton is in grad school Poke00210 (8:40:52 PM): that was stupid Poke00210 (8:41:22 PM): oh, and the irony of these actors wondering what it would be like to have shows of their own.... Poke00210 (8:41:33 PM): that didn't escape me, i was cooking up some brats Poke00210 (8:42:34 PM): well, upon futher inspection, i think i would make out w/paris hilton if given the opportunity Poke00210 (8:43:01 PM): hey, timo maas Poke00210 (8:43:44 PM): yeah you OC dumbfuck Poke00210 (8:43:50 PM): talk back to a bouncer Poke00210 (8:43:53 PM): dumbfuck Poke00210 (8:44:02 PM): nice job dipshit Poke00210 (8:44:43 PM): oh and great it's sarah jessica parker Poke00210 (8:44:51 PM): she was cute in flight of the navigator Poke00210 (8:44:55 PM): BACK IN TEH REAGAN ADMINISTRATION Poke00210 (8:45:07 PM): and kristin keruk Poke00210 (8:45:09 PM): kreuk Poke00210 (8:45:19 PM): i'm gonna issue the jimmy veto Poke00210 (8:45:41 PM): ohmy, a bonus episode of the OC?/ really? Poke00210 (8:45:45 PM): yeah right Poke00210 (8:45:57 PM): The Apprentice will be the object of my scorn soon enough Poke00210 (8:46:30 PM): well for those of you still playing, 40-50mins has a few short minutes to make a move, else 50+ will win Poke00210 (8:46:39 PM): and i have 3.5 minutes until that happens Poke00210 (8:47:18 PM): well by that shitty honda logic, you should make your cars out of nerf Poke00210 (8:47:20 PM): it's back Poke00210 (8:47:24 PM): whatta tool Poke00210 (8:47:39 PM): yeah go around dipshit Poke00210 (8:47:50 PM): great Poke00210 (8:48:08 PM): ooh hi red Poke00210 (8:48:11 PM): window Poke00210 (8:48:14 PM): yeah i saw that coming Poke00210 (8:48:30 PM): that chick has an old head Poke00210 (8:48:34 PM): or a young body Poke00210 (8:48:36 PM): ooh boots Poke00210 (8:48:46 PM): her name is ginger Poke00210 (8:49:07 PM): yeah you little shit Poke00210 (8:49:10 PM): one minute left Poke00210 (8:49:50 PM): heh Poke00210 (8:49:55 PM): they vip'd in Poke00210 (8:50:03 PM): and that's 50mins Poke00210 (8:50:17 PM): i'm actually kinda curious what that dude was gonna tell the other chick Poke00210 (8:50:34 PM): that goofy looking young dude Poke00210 (8:51:10 PM): heh Poke00210 (8:51:15 PM): stupid stupid Poke00210 (8:51:17 PM): stupid show Poke00210 (8:51:23 PM): man, that happened two minutes too late Poke00210 (8:51:28 PM): fuck this show i'm thrunign this shit off Poke00210 (8:51:35 PM): see ya Poke00210 (8:51:45 PM): ooh, megan mullaly cleavage on W&G Poke00210 (8:51:53 PM): annoying fag on W&G Poke00210 (8:51:55 PM): see ya Poke00210 (8:52:05 PM): OK, survivor Poke00210 (8:52:07 PM): goodnight kids Poke00210 (8:52:08 PM): ! Poke00210 (8:52:11 PM): i'mposting

fuck the font tag. fucking w/my colors again

and debra messing is fucking nasty